I just tried to explain the Star Trek time line to my co-worker

Kinja'd!!! "Highlander-Datsuns are Forever" (jamesbowland)
03/08/2019 at 14:37 • Filed to: Star Trek

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She stopped me after Deep Space Nine, when I was trying to describe the Delta quadrant to her in Star Trek Voyager. “This sounds like Chinese to me, and I don’t speak Chinese, I am literally not registering any of this.”

I didn’t even get a chance to rant how Voyager made it 7 seasons!!!

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Nor did she know Patrick Stuart was the captain in TNG, and was not called James T Kirk !!!

Kids these days, they need to know their history.

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DISCUSSION (43)


Kinja'd!!! Svend > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 14:50

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I was having a good time forgetting those existed.

Thanks,

I hat ed Deep Space 9 the most of them , but at least it wasn’t as bad as Babylon 5.


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Svend
03/08/2019 at 14:52

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Of the series, I think I actually like the next generation and “Enterprise” the most. The production quality on Enterprise is pretty good and I like the Archer character. TNG is just classic star trek with an exceptional cast.

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Kinja'd!!! user314 > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 14:56

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Aw! I bet trying to explain STD (it’s a prequel to TOS, but all the technology is better  somehow ...) would have been a trip.


Kinja'd!!! Deal Killer - Powered by Focus > Svend
03/08/2019 at 14:56

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Babylon 5 “Bad”? Yeah, right..

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Kinja'd!!! facw > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 14:59

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I tried watching Enterprise, but I couldn’t do it. Everything just felt sort of wrong about it.


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > user314
03/08/2019 at 15:00

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When our real life technology exceeds what they are doing on TV I think there is a good cause to continue to make the technology look futuristic. The bridge of the Discover is by far the best of all the series tho, large, with a huge view screen.

STD, lol.


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Svend
03/08/2019 at 15:00

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I need to watch Babylon 5 now, I never disliked it.


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > facw
03/08/2019 at 15:01

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I really like Scott Baculla, after quantum leap I was a fan.


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:02

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My general take is that Voyager had a lot more immediate appeal (spectacle, likable/”pretty” characters, etc.) than DS9, but tended on average to be dumberer. Not to say that Voyager didn’t have some really good episodes or that The Dumb didn’t raise its head on DS9 on a regular basis, just taken at averages.

TNG of course had good immediate appeal * and* mostly wasn’t too dumb, placing it (to me) higher than either , but some of the production design and low ebb written episodes... wow. Strangely, I think it runs a little in reverse to TOS, in that the high concept episodes were often worse than the planet-of-the-week episodes.


Kinja'd!!! Arrivederci > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:03

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I enjoyed TNG, DS9 and most of Voyager.  I won’t die on a hill for Voyager, but I will admit that I liked *most* of it.  


Kinja'd!!! VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely > Deal Killer - Powered by Focus
03/08/2019 at 15:03

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Love the show, but if you don’t like lengthly monologues or obscure references , B5 is not for you.


Kinja'd!!! VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:04

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I have several opinions about this that I will have to share later. 


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely
03/08/2019 at 15:05

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Kinja'd!!! benn454 > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:06

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 Does she at least know how many lights there are?


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > benn454
03/08/2019 at 15:07

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Ummm no... but I see four lights!

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Kinja'd!!! Svend > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:09

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Oh man, it dragged and b anged on and on.

I must prefer The O rville. 


Kinja'd!!! ranwhenparked > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:13

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Fun fact, did you know that the spaceship itself was not actually called the Star Trek? 


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > ranwhenparked
03/08/2019 at 15:15

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Kinja'd!!! facw > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:15

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I think it’s on Prime streaming? Though apparently the CGI looks quite bad, even beyond being mid-’90s vintage: ‘Babylon 5’ is great, so why does it look so bad?


Kinja'd!!! Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:15

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Star Trek TV Ranked:

The Next Generation

The Orville

TOS

DS9

Enterprise

Voyager

Discovery

also dont believe me that the orville is a trek series

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Boom!


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero
03/08/2019 at 15:17

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I’m watching Discovery and really enjoying it. It’s just a more modern production and writing . Folks are panning it but it has good characters and a plot that involves a young S pock.


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > ranwhenparked
03/08/2019 at 15:20

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And weirdly, there never was a Star War. It was the Naboo Trade Conflict (?), the Clone Wars and the Galactic Civil War.


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Arrivederci
03/08/2019 at 15:22

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Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Arrivederci
03/08/2019 at 15:24

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My wife always called Jeri Ryan 6 of 9. I was like umm yeah?


Kinja'd!!! Arrivederci > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:29

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LOL - she was close.


Kinja'd!!! VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:40

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Oh, I was always here. That’s why there’s no more chips. But I’ll go get more. 


Kinja'd!!! Chariotoflove > ranwhenparked
03/08/2019 at 15:42

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Starred for creative trolling.


Kinja'd!!! Chariotoflove > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:43

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You could’ve really messed her up with this:

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Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Chariotoflove
03/08/2019 at 15:53

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Was this the parody show Fox tried last fall?


Kinja'd!!! Bman76 (hates WS6 hoods, is on his phone and has 4 burners now) > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 15:54

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I’ll never get the Voyager hate. I loved all of the Star Trek series with TOS probably being my least favorite just because of its age.

Hell, I thoroughly enjoyed Enterprise.


Kinja'd!!! MrDakka > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero
03/08/2019 at 16:08

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1. DS9

FTFY


Kinja'd!!! CompactLuxuryFan > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 16:09

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It’s a Black Mirror episode.


Kinja'd!!! Chariotoflove > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 16:11

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This is from a series called Black Mirror . You can see it on Netflix . It’s anthology sci-fi with a dark side . The pic is from the first episode of season 4, titled “ USS Calister” .


Kinja'd!!! MrDakka > Svend
03/08/2019 at 16:12

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You’re dead to me now. XD

DS9 was the best trek, because it best showed the struggle to maintain the ideals of the federation in a realpolitik ga laxy.

And B5 is underrated


Kinja'd!!! user314 > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 16:26

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True, and stuff like that I’d let slide, but Sarek’s hologram just killed it. 


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Bman76 (hates WS6 hoods, is on his phone and has 4 burners now)
03/08/2019 at 16:30

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I don’t hate voyager at all, but there are some pretty weird episodes. My friends sister was the producer of Voyager and was very proud of that, I teased him on how the heck they kept getting renewed .


Kinja'd!!! Kiltedpadre > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero
03/08/2019 at 21:02

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Something seems to be missing from your list. Hint: it belongs at the bottom.

I agree that the Orville is an excellent Trek series.


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/08/2019 at 23:21

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For every “Year Of Hell” there was a “Threshold”. It was a very inconsistent show.


Kinja'd!!! BaconSandwich is tasty. > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/09/2019 at 01:11

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I'm currently watching season five of Voyager. I never really got to watch Star Trek as a kid, so I'm watching it all now. I've finished TNG, then after Voyager I might try DS9.


Kinja'd!!! VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/09/2019 at 02:52

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Okay.

So what I am thinking is that trying to explain the entire franchise and its extremely convoluted timeline to the uninitiated is probably a bad idea without distilling it down into a few ways.

1. KISS - keep it simple stupid

Although it’s tempting to go into detail remember that this is probably washing machines to them. As such it’s important to keep things simple. What’s TOS? It’s about a starship crew that goes on an exploration mission for 5 years with a Kennedy-esque leader and was known for breaking casting conv ention by casting different races for like the first time. What’s TNG ? It’s a show a hundred years after that about a smart bald captain solving problems in bigger ship in our corner of the Galaxy. He also likes tea and is scared of cyborgs.

It sucks but the reality is TL;DR helps.

2. Make it personable - if they liked bingeable season wide arc narratives then tell them a bit about Sisko’s conflict with Winn and Dukat. If they like space battles talk a bit about the Dominion War or the first 20 minutes of First Contact. If they prefer nuTrek (my wife does) talk a bit about Zachary Quinto and maybe how Nimoy-Spock helps him. Craft your recommendation a bit.

3. The analogy system that ST uses in everything helps. “Like putting too much air in a balloon!... Or like a balloon... When something bad happens!” Voyager’s premise is loosely similar to Homer’s Odyssey, but they might like Greek myths so that’s a good jumping point I think. TNG talks a lot about civil rights diplomacy and ethics but they also have a lot of passionate feuds, growing-up-poor stories and broken families, like a Starfleet version of Law and Order SVU. So there’s always those comparisons. And yes I know these shows are sectors apart, but it helps to demonstrate similarities to keep your audience interested.

Or you can suggest the Star Trek Futurama episode. It’s a fun way to introduce the TOS cast.

The Federation is just what happens when people get together and they don’t need to boost their own egos or show off how much money they make. They want to help people and sometimes it’s fun and interesting drama when they fuck up. That’s the premise of the shows at their core. How a society of near perfect people display flaws, become personable, and learn what’s really important to them through the art of fucking up and exploding consoles.

For specific timeline stuff just tell them it’s set in the 23rd century. There was a big nuclear war in the around like 2040 and then aliens came (you could say that the Vulcans are like space elves who like logic) and helped mankind rebuild and then they go explore the Galaxy for 200 years, making friends and enemies along the way.

I think getting more mired in the details will turn casuals off and you should always craft answers to the questions and comments they have. If they look bored or confused back off and make it simpler and funnier.


Kinja'd!!! CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/10/2019 at 19:08

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Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever
03/10/2019 at 20:38

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A batholith, oh my god I need to go there next time I’m in Portland. 


Kinja'd!!! ateamfan42 > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
03/11/2019 at 09:57

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Kids these days, they need to know their history.

Would this be considered the “cliff notes” version?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwhAq3F8NCE