Neighborhood crisis

"Chariotoflove" (chariotoflove) 02/02/2019 at 13:12 • Filed to: fast and furious

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Our newly elected HOA officers just announced by email that they will be having speed humps installed in our community to help enforce the 15 mph limit. This has started a huge back and forth over the ether over the last 12 hours.

On the one hand, we do have a consistent problem with speeding over the 18 years I’ve lived here. On the other hand, speed bumps ice for cars and make bicycling troublesome.

I am the person who started the 15 mph limit when I was on the Board, and I observe it. But I am against humps. Knowing our neighborhood, this is going to be a real drama.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:18

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Enjoy the sounds of creaking suspensions forever, and  BANGS from people hitting them too fast.

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:19

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i love those humps... especially the slightly too high ones

i speed up for them and hit em full pelt makes for great jumps

my front suspension hates me

*bunnyhops for shits and giggles*

benjrblant > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:22

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HOA’s are a speed hump for getting anything done.

Dash-doorhandle-6 cyl none the richer > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:24

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There are some benefits to living amongst the poors.  And the shirtless/shavenheaded/meth enthusiasts stay indoors for half the year in Canada.  

ttyymmnn > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:28

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Speed bumps suck. 

His Stigness > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:31

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Just send the speed bumps to me, I’m tired of people speeding down my narrow street. I have been tempted to just buy my own.

XJDano > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:38

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Are these your neighbors?

https://twitter.com/bestofnextdoor/status/1090419857227538433?s=21

Urambo Tauro > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:39

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Is this a private street, or more of a parking lot? Generally speaking, 25 is low enough unless you’re in the immediate vicinity of pedestrian traffic (like in parking lots, or if they’re walking along the edge of the road on account of there being no sidewalks). That’s when 15 (or sometimes even 10) becomes more appropriate.

Speed bumps suck though. They punish the innocent along with the guilty and actually make me WANT to speed between them to make up for lost time...

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:46

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A better solution is to narrow the street. https://nacto.org/docs/usdg/speed_control_and_speed_humps_szplett.pdf

gogmorgo - rowing gears in a Grand Cherokee > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 13:47

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I dislike speed bumps, and refuse to acknowledge their presence and cruise over them at the speed limit without even letting off the throttle. The people who wanted them installed them can put up with the noise it makes. My Jeeps can handle it.

We had some extra tall ones on my first university campus, to the point my first-year design project featured them as a joke because everyone complained. They were probably at least six inches high, and navigating them was done in two styles: either stopping on the brakes immediately before, and then crawling across, dragging the underbelly of your car then gunning it to the next one; or else just running them at a cruising speed that launched the front end high enough you didn’t scrape. Sitting and watching traffic was an enjoyable pass time because watching every other minivan grabbing air was hilarious. They also kept campus security occupied at night , as students had obviously turned it into a sport to see who could launch their car the furthest. Because obviously.

I saw a system online recently that radar tracked vehicles speeds, and deployed the bumps if they were excessive. The tracking was extensive enough to be able to distinguish between someone cruising at the designated “safe” speed and someone going too quickly but slowing down for the bumps. It’s probably one hell of a lot more expensive to install because it needs dug into the road , and you’d still hear traffic hitting the collapsed  metal plate, but in my mind that's the way to go. 

Chariotoflove > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/02/2019 at 14:05

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someassemblyrequired > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:08

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Oppo Solution: add chicanes 

Chariotoflove > Urambo Tauro 02/02/2019 at 14:10

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This is a gated residential community with no outlet. We have had kids playing right next to the street for its entire history. I’ve had to watch for balls rolling into the road countless times. 15 works here, and if people would just do it, they wouldn’t lose that much of their day. Our most consistent offenders are the dinks and the delivery vans in a schedule. 

Chariotoflove > benjrblant 02/02/2019 at 14:11

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They can be. We’ve worked hard to prevent that here. 

Chariotoflove > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 02/02/2019 at 14:12

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Ugh. Try it on a hand cycle and it’s not so fun. 

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:13

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ah sorry mate... hadnt thought about that

Chariotoflove > His Stigness 02/02/2019 at 14:13

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Oh won’t you be popular. 

Chariotoflove > someassemblyrequired 02/02/2019 at 14:14

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I want you on my HOA board. 

Shoop > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:14

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Lmao, there's a street I used to take at 30 in my truck, then they put in speed bumps and a speed table, so now I take it at 45 and the suspension absorbs the bumps. 

Chariotoflove > XJDano 02/02/2019 at 14:16

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Alas, no bobcats next door. 

WilliamsSW > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:19

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I’m glad I live in town and not in an JIA.

Is it me or are HOAS ubiquitous in Texas?

Speed bumps are dumb - 

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck 02/02/2019 at 14:20

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A lot of good stuff in there. We have a straight away over the creek between our two side streets. That’s where many people build up a head of steam. If I could build this place from scratch, I would implement a bunch of those methods. 

Chariotoflove > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 02/02/2019 at 14:22

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Nah, for you it would be great. Gotta see the fun in things where you can find it.

My daughter though perceptively noted  that there will be toddlers face planting.

Chariotoflove > Shoop 02/02/2019 at 14:23

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That’s probably what all the big SUVs will do here. 

Chariotoflove > WilliamsSW 02/02/2019 at 14:24

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They are ubiquitous. Every developer sets one up before all his lots are even sold.

We actually do live in the city per se. it’s just not down town row house living. 

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:27

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yep... there will be

*laughs maniacally* uhh i mean.. thats terrible... poor kids

(i faceplanted a lot as a tod)

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:28

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This is what they’re gonna install:

Chariotoflove > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 02/02/2019 at 14:29

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That actually explains a lot. :p

Chariotoflove > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 02/02/2019 at 14:29

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Fu...

His Stigness > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:34

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I would do it in the dead of the night. I already secretly call PD for illegal parkers.

Yes, I’m an asshole. 

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 14:57

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Our street is a 1/4 mile straight with a short side street at the far end. The people at the back are often doing 40+ by the time they get to our end of the street. Our neighbors and I would park our cars on the street to create a slalom or choke point when the kids were out front playing basketball or riding their bikes. When the street is choked down to one lane, traffic really slows down.

Nick- Professional Car Destroyer > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 15:08

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My grandmothers HOA did speed bumps 20 or so years ago, after a few years they regretted the decision and removed all but 3 after the plow trucks kept destroying them, and a number of people complained about having to drive over them.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 15:11

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I always giggle when i see a “speed hump” sign, I don’t know why...

facw > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 15:41

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Neighborhood near me in Austin did this type:

Placed so that they are in the track of normal traffic, but easy enough for bicycles and emergency vehicles to bypass. I don’t remember exactly where it was, but somewhere I lived had a “ mesa” style bump in each lane that was just wide enough that normal passenger cars would have to hit it, but wider track emergency vehicles and trucks would at most hit the lower ramps on the side, and they also left plenty or room for bikes on the side.  

facw > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 15:48

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My parent’s neighborhood has four of these:

In the picture it looks a bit flat, but it’s actually quite tall, and t hat 5pmh limit is no joke, as you can see by the number of gouges in the bump and the pavement in front of it (people bottom out on the bump or land nose first). I’ve seen one car get completely airborne on this one. I don’t actually take the other road to their house because one of the b umps there always bottoms out my car regardless of speed.

Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 15:48

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They recently installed humps in my neighborhood. Mixed bag, but they do have a break in them for motorcycles, bikes and scooters to make it through, which is nice.

Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 15:50

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Also, depending on budget, looks like “active” speed bumps are becoming more viable. Basically a speed bump that only exists if your exceeding the limit.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > facw 02/02/2019 at 16:33

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Seems a little malicious.

The harsher s peed bumps here are usually just used to deter people using their road at all. I like the ones that are discontinuous. They have breaks in the middle and sides for a soft bipass, and the are loooong but only a couple inches tall, so no one has to come to a dead stop and traffic moves nice and smoothly at 25 mph.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 16:43

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Chariotoflove > His Stigness 02/02/2019 at 17:09

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Remind to not piss you off. 

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck 02/02/2019 at 17:10

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Sounds like a nightmare. Good solution. 

Chariotoflove > Nick- Professional Car Destroyer 02/02/2019 at 17:17

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I’m pretty sure that will happen here. There has been a huge email war ongoing since this morning over it. Hopefully we can stop it. 

Chariotoflove > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 02/02/2019 at 17:18

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Saw a sign that said humps next quarter mile. Told my wife that was giving us permission.

Chariotoflove > facw 02/02/2019 at 17:21

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If you’re gonna have them, that’s at least a good compromise. 

Chariotoflove > facw 02/02/2019 at 17:23

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I don’t like these because even a reasonable 15 mph will scrape the front on a car like mine. Not all of us drive lifted vehicles yet. 

Chariotoflove > Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo 02/02/2019 at 17:25

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I mean, I was the person who instituted the speed limit originally. If we end up having the humps, I hope we can at least get accommodations like that. 

Chariotoflove > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/02/2019 at 17:30

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That’s just evil, camouflaging it like that. 

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 17:31

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I agree, basically a booby-trap, which is illegal if it were private property.

Nick- Professional Car Destroyer > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 18:03

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Even if you can’t stop it whoever is on the board will get angery about them and have them removed. That is basically what happened. The ones that were removed were all conveniently on the streets with the board members living there.

His Stigness > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 18:28

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I’m sure we’d get along just fine. As long as everyone follows the rules.

And speaking of that, I want to be in your hoa. Mine won't enforce crap so I'm 99% sure I'm going to sue them. Keep that in mind running the hoa. I think most tenants wouldn't resort to a lawsuit, but this place deserves it as they tried to blame me for a dog going in the common areas. They didn't say anything to us, they just sent a letter to the property owner and the property management. And of course they didn't provide any evidence. 

Chariotoflove > His Stigness 02/02/2019 at 19:22

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I was vp for several years and still do all the architecture change approvals. I always try to do things with an eye toward helping people, not coercing them. There have been a few times when we’ve had to get tough, mostly about refusal to pay dues. There was one guy who parked a large piece of industrial machinery in front of his house. Mostly we fine, and if people don’t pay, we put a lien on the house. We get ours eventually. 

facw > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/02/2019 at 19:42

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harsher speed bumps here are usually just used to deter people using their road at all 

Exactly the case here. Basically, a large office park was built just across the town line, so my parent’s town made three changes:

Convert the road to the office park to one way. so the office workers can only use it for half their commute at most

Remove a right-turn yield lane from the intersection off that road, so that driver’s turning right have to stop.

Install these giant speed bumps to make going through less appealing.

facw > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 21:11

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I mean they are legitimate options in places where parking isn’t tight:

https://safety.fhwa.dot.gov/speedmgt/ePrimer_modules/module3.cfm

Chariotoflove > facw 02/02/2019 at 21:18

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I wish we could assemble a blue ribbon panel of opponauts to come talk some sense into my community. 

someassemblyrequired > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 22:30

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That’s a slippery slope - next edict:

All homeowners must own and street park at least three project vehicles. A t least one of these vehicles must be a parts car or non-runner.

someassemblyrequired > Chariotoflove 02/02/2019 at 22:48

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In all seriousness, these are great because drivers are not focused on speeding between the speedbumps. It keeps the speeds low and requires full attention from drivers. Where a design like that fails is with emergency vehicles, which is where facw’s design works much better, as there is a full lane available down the center of the street with traffic pulled over. It can also use existing curbing (just requires a restripe and the planters).

Seattle has two cool concepts as well - the first is that residential intersections are straight up unsigned in some neighborhoods. There are no stop signs or yield marks. Apparently it drops speeds and reduces collisions, though I’d have to find the reference, but here’s a quote from the Seattle Times:

If three or more crashes occurred at a particular intersection over a year, or at least five within a two-year period, the intersection may qualify for a stop sign, SDOT says. Another condition is if more than 6,000 vehicles travel through the area each day.

The agency, however, does not install stop signs to slow traffic.

“When stop signs are installed as ‘speed breakers,’ accidents don’t decrease, and sometimes increase,” the department’s website says.

SDOT pointed to research that says because not all motorists safely stop at the signs, the signs can give pedestrians a false sense of safety. Also, vehicle speeds in an area may actually increase with stop signs since motorists tend to drive faster after stopping to regain time, the research says.

They also do a lot of mini-roundabouts. They’ll just dump a planter in the middle of an intersection, and instant roundabout:

http://www.seattle.gov/transportation/projects-and-programs/safety-first/neighborhood-traffic-operations/traffic-circles

Chariotoflove > someassemblyrequired 02/02/2019 at 23:50

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Take the good with the bad, I guess.