Mainstream chocolate brands, ranked.

"not for canada - australian in disguise" (for-canada) 07/18/2018 at 19:18 • Filed to: LISTICLES

3

54

1. Lindt

2. Ikea

3. Purdy’s

4 . Cadbury (Canada + Commonwealth version)

5. Milka

6 . Neilson

7 . Nestle (I don’t think Nestle actually make a regular normal chocolate bar. If they do, they don’t sell it in Canada. Aero is close enough)

8 . American Cadbury

9. Hot garbage

10. American v omit chocolate Hershey’s

AestheticsInMotion > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:33

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Where’s C ookies & C ream Hershey’s tho

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:35

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I’m just glad to see Lidnt on #1. And placement of Hershey’s is the correct take.

benjrblant > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:35

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I’m most shocked that Ikea made #2.

lone_liberal > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:35

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No Ghirardelli, Sees or Mars?  

Berang > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:39

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hot take: chocolate is bad

dudebra > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:43

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Milk chocolate is garbage.

Go dark or go home.

not for canada - australian in disguise > AestheticsInMotion 07/18/2018 at 19:45

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White chocolate is not chocolate.

Then again neither is regular Hershey’s.

not for canada - australian in disguise > lone_liberal 07/18/2018 at 19:46

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Never had Ghiradelli or Sees. Mars doesn’t make a straight up chocolate bar to my knowledge.

not for canada - australian in disguise > benjrblant 07/18/2018 at 19:46

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Ikea has very good chocolate for very cheap. It used to be like 99c for a bar, but I think it’s a bit more now. 

CRider > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:47

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Why isn’t there any real choco late on your list?

lone_liberal > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:51

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They kind of do, as they own the Dove brand and the 3 Musketeers bar is all “chocolate” of a sort . 

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:52

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I like Lindt Balls. I used to throw balls out of my bag of balls at my coworkers and they loved the salty ones.

Nestle makes that chocolate type coating that covers Coffee Crisps, too.

You’re missing at least G hirardelli among American-made chocolates, too, not to mention regional ones like Theo.

AestheticsInMotion > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:53

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So you're saying Cookies & Cream Hershey’s has transcended normal pedestrian chocolate? 

LOREM IPSUM > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 19:55

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Hershey’s syrup > Nesquik

fhrblig > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:03

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I can’t speak on Lindt, because the bar pictured would be poisonous to me (hazelnuts). I don’t think I’ve seen the Ikea brand. Every time I’ve gone to Ikea, they’ve had Marabou chocolate which is fantastic.

shop-teacher > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:04

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Lindt  is wildly overrated.

PyramidHat > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:07

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Many years ago I dated someone from the UK and she introduced me to UK Cadburys...took my head clean off, it did...

Tekamul > LOREM IPSUM 07/18/2018 at 20:07

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No!

Svend > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:07

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Mars owns Galaxy, who make a plain chocolate and flavoured chocolates.

It’s the most incredibly  smooth and creamy chocolates you’ll ever taste.

PyramidHat > lone_liberal 07/18/2018 at 20:08

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Ghirardelli and See’s are West of the Mississisiiisispppiii, mostly.  While they’re good in a “yeah, you’re eating chocolate” sort of way, they’re not the be all end all.  To me See’s is more of a nostalgic thing - family always used to get it for the holidays...

Tekamul > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:11

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Half of those I've never heard of. Cadbury (American) should be higher. I assume Ikea contains either horse meat or pressed sawdust.

not for canada - australian in disguise > LOREM IPSUM 07/18/2018 at 20:14

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This is the worst take.

not for canada - australian in disguise > shop-teacher 07/18/2018 at 20:14

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No u

not for canada - australian in disguise > Svend 07/18/2018 at 20:14

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I didn’t realise Mars made Dove/Galaxy. I haven’t seen either in a store in a very long time though, I think they’ve been discontinued in Canada.

LOREM IPSUM > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:19

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Best syrup is best though.

Svend > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:20

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For me it’s

Galaxy (Mars),

Nestle,

Cadbury,

Milka,

Thorntons,

Lindt,

Heidi,

Green & Black,

LOREM IPSUM > Tekamul 07/18/2018 at 20:20

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Indubitably.

Svend > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 20:25

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That is an absolute shame.

http://www.galaxychocolate.co.uk/

They do some great stuff.

Though I want to know when salted caramel became such a thing.

For years we’ve been told to reduce our salt intake, then they put salt in caramel, suddenly having salt is fine. 

Svend > PyramidHat 07/18/2018 at 20:31

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Visit the U.K. and prepare to put on a lot of weight.

There are a mass of companies now, many making better chocolate than Cadbury’s. 

AntiSpeed > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 21:09

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AntiSpeed > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 21:11

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Hershey’s*

*Processed cocoa product

not for canada - australian in disguise > AntiSpeed 07/18/2018 at 21:12

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You know, I’ve never had Ritter Sport. I’m probably missing out.

fintail > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 21:37

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MMmmmmmm

Edit: I am also into Lindt, here’s the outlet store from my last visit, with my rental Jaaaaaaag out front:

fintail > shop-teacher 07/18/2018 at 21:39

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I suspect the US has different offerings than some of the rest of the world. I think it might be sweeter, like the Nutella, KitKat and Ovaltine for that market.  I know some production is in the US now, I assume for the US market.

I’ve visited the Lindt outlet store at the HQ factory 4 times, they have some awesome stuff.

dogisbadob > LOREM IPSUM 07/18/2018 at 21:40

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not Bosco? :p

dogisbadob > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 21:42

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Totally agree that Lindt is #1

But you also forgot Schogetten from Aldi. It’s only $1 and from Gerrmany :o)

Godiva is ok too

not for canada - australian in disguise > dogisbadob 07/18/2018 at 22:11

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We haven’t got Aldi in Canada, sadly.

415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°) > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 22:26

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Milk chocolate tastes awful to me, I mainly eat 88 % dark Chocolove.

not for canada - australian in disguise > 415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°) 07/18/2018 at 22:36

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I could never eat dark chocolate that strong. I think like 65% would be my personal limit before things get too bitter.

dogisbadob > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 22:38

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oops sorry

shop-teacher > fintail 07/18/2018 at 22:50

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Having never left US soil, I cannot comment on the differences between what we get and what the rest of the world gets. I like Lindt, but at least what they sell here, Cadbury is superior.

shop-teacher > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/18/2018 at 22:50

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Are pooping.

AestheticsInMotion > PyramidHat 07/18/2018 at 23:13

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Interesting. Besides Hershey’s, I would have guessed See's and Ghirardelli had the largest share of chocolate brand awareness, followed by Lindt. I'm certainly west of the Mississippi though... 

fintail > shop-teacher 07/18/2018 at 23:24

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You should head up to Canada and check out their Cadbury selection - they get loads more than what is seen in Murka.

My weakness for Cadbury is their hard shell chocolate mini eggs at Easter .

415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°) > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/19/2018 at 00:28

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Ah but the really good companies can make a smooth one, shit companies mess up the high % bars. The 65% is very good actually, t hat red one, they make it with cherries in it too, yum. 

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/19/2018 at 00:50

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I agree with the Hershey’s ranking.  I once bought a Hershey’s dark chocolate bar... it was THE WORST chocolate I had in a very long time. 

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > not for canada - australian in disguise 07/19/2018 at 00:51

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It’s at least as good as the Ikea chocolate. 

shop-teacher > fintail 07/19/2018 at 08:56

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I will do that, if the state department deems me worthy of a passport next time around. I was denied the first time I applied. That was well.over a decade ago now.

Yes! The mini eggs are amazing! I'm pretty sure they put cocaine or something in them.

fintail > shop-teacher 07/19/2018 at 09:42

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Denied a passport? Do you have a crazy past we don’t know about? Scratch that - in this day and age, those with sketchy histories receive cushy government appointments. I think an “enhanced” DL is also valid for Canadian travel.

Cadbury Mini Eggs - Betcha Can’t Eat Just 20

shop-teacher > fintail 07/19/2018 at 11:34

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When I applied, I was sent a letter from the state department saying that I had been randomly selected to provide more information, along with a stapled packet of papers that essentially asked for my life’s story from birth to that day. They wanted the address of every place I ever lived, every school I ever went to, every job I ever held and who was my primary supervisor, copies of three current IDs , copies of 5 expired IDs (who keeps those?), etc, etc. The packet was so poorly xeroxed, it looked like it was a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy, that I thought it was a scam. If that info had fallen into the wrong hands, my identity would be wholely screwed for eternity. I almost called the local police to report the scam, but decided to just throw it away.

Two months later I got another letter from the state department saying that since I hadn’t provided the additional info, I couldn’t have a passport. They sent my photo back, and invited me to apply again in the future. I’m worried that I am now on some sort of watch list.

How many mini eggs I eat, depends entirely on how big the bag is.

fintail > shop-teacher 07/19/2018 at 19:15

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Wacky.  I wonder if some kind of criminal has the same or very similar name as you.  I’ve never been given a second look, even my application/interview for Nexus/Global Entry was almost nothing.

shop-teacher > fintail 07/19/2018 at 22:38

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I don’t know. The initial letter said I was randomly chosen ... Not that that means it's true. There was another person in my state with my name. I know that because I met his mother, who was very surprised, because it’s a somewhat unusual name.

I have been used twice as a character reference for people’s top security clearance, so maybe that would help. Probably not though.

fintail > shop-teacher 07/20/2018 at 14:57

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Bizarre.

I wonder if you could do the enhanced drivers license route.  Although I suppose you have enough projects at hand to reduce demand for international travel anyway.

shop-teacher > fintail 07/20/2018 at 18:46

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Yeah, right now it's not a priority. I do want to get a passport in the next couple of years. I want to travel and see things. Unfortunately life and family and our house haven't made that possible yet. It will happen though.