I can't even right now

"AestheticsInMotion" (aestheticsinmotion)
04/06/2018 at 19:19 • Filed to: None

One of my guys rolled his Tahoe. How? By parking in the same spot he’s parked in for the past four years for work, but like, really, REALLY badly. He now needs an offroad extraction according to the first tow company I called (they refused).

Here’s what I saw when I pulled in to work today. I legitimately thought he’d been hit by a big truck and gotten pushed. Nope. That’s how he parked. For reference, myself and all of my other employees park completely on pavement. Notice the Tahoe, completely off pavement.

When asked if he was in a collision, he said “I just slipped a little, I’ll be fine”.

No. No you won’t be but we have a big day so moving forward....

We finish up our day, get back and I tell him to call a tow company. Instead he attempts to drive out—swaying dangerously, right two wheels now in the stream—and gets stuck even worse. That’s what you see in the header picture. I refuse to try to pull him out because I try not to respond to DUMB with more DUMB, so he tries again.

And rolls the Tahoe.

I need a drink

DISCUSSION (23)

Tekamul > AestheticsInMotion
04/06/2018 at 19:27

Invincible-SUV-itis

You should probably remind him never to drive 70 in a blizzard on all seasons, because it seems like something he’d do

MM54 > AestheticsInMotion
04/06/2018 at 19:27

No use being dumb unless you show it.

Flynorcal: pilot, offshore sailor, car racer and panty thief > AestheticsInMotion
04/06/2018 at 19:28

I needed a drink yesterday and it certainly helped. I’m having another right now so Virtual Cheers

AestheticsInMotion > MM54
04/06/2018 at 19:30

He’s a good guy... But I genuinely do not understand how something like this happens. I don’t think my mind could ever comprehend the way that his works

AestheticsInMotion > Tekamul
04/06/2018 at 19:30

No it’s okay it has awd

BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind > AestheticsInMotion
04/06/2018 at 19:34

To be fair, it doesn’t look like it’s *that* steep of an embankment and I’d totally try to drive out. I’ve been in way worse situations with a Subaru and gotten out without drama.

TahoeSTi > BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind
04/06/2018 at 19:35

Yeah but SUVs don’t have a low center of gravity, and most have pretty shitty AWD/4wd setups.

AestheticsInMotion > BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind
04/06/2018 at 19:38

A lot lower CG though. I’m not exaggerating in the slightest when I say I could have pushed it over on its side by myself.

All four wheels were spinning the first attempt. And you can’t really tell from the pictures, but the two right wheels are submerged about 5 inches in water, with mud underneath. I’m doubtful if my Miata would have been able to get out without assistance. My Outback would have had no chance...

AestheticsInMotion > Flynorcal: pilot, offshore sailor, car racer and panty thief
04/06/2018 at 19:39

Have another. I’ll join as soon as possible