5 Days Without a Car

"Quadradeuce" (quadradeuce) 10/27/2018 at 18:49 • Filed to: Are you all children?

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Flew out to our cottage to close it for the season. We usually drive, this is actually the first time in my life we’ve ever flown without renting a car. Thanks Uber! It’s a weird experience. Walking everywhere, including the grocery store, which is about 20 minutes away. I need to get my golf cart restored and bring it out here (yes, they allow them on the roads for $75/yr registration ). Cigars, beer, chopping wood, and getting ready for a long winter’s rest. Life holds little more. Except...

It would be a very relaxing weekend, but I get to see all the damage my cousins have done to the place. Flag pole is missing, gum stuck under the bar counter, paint spilled on the carpet, indoor furniture left outside and rained on (then brought back inside like nothing happened), tons of indoor firewood burned outside in the firepit instead of all the pine and garbage wood that I wanted burned, and screen door AN NIHILATED by someone’s dog, just after I fixed it in the spring from someone else’s dog.

I’m debating what to do about this. This is a multigenerational cottage that is loved by many. But the younger generation is abusing it, and by extension me. I’m the current caretaker, and I’ve put a lot of time and money into it. About 24 weeks of vacation time in the last 6 years have been spent fixing deferred maintenance, and six figures of cash.

I’m debating not letting a good portion of my family use it any longer. I’ve already told them and warned them about how I feel about the situation. We’re beyond that.

The funny part is, the non family people who use it treat it significantly better than my own family. Ugh, why are people such savages?

Time for another beer to wait out this nor’easter. Prost, oppos!

WilliamsSW > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 19:16

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Honestly, if you know who did it, it’s time to cut them off.

That’s bullshit. 

AestheticsInMotion > WilliamsSW 10/27/2018 at 19:18

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This. Don’t get conned by the whole “but we’re family!!!” thing.

The Dummy Gummy > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 19:22

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Give them boot. Period. Best thing you can do. If you don’t respect the property, you didn’t earn the privilege to be there. Fuck any man child that can’t understand this basic concept.

I legit never understood why someone would destroy what is theres.

facw > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 19:24

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You should not feel bad about either not letter bad actors return, or sending them a bill for damages. It’s obvious that one of the two needs to happen if the place is going to be maintained.

atfsgeoff > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 19:27

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Bunch of self-entitled ingrates. Change the locks.

Quadradeuce > WilliamsSW 10/27/2018 at 19:46

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That’s the problem, I don't know 100%. And people have lied to me in the past.  Like when someone dumped bug spray on the concrete counters I made and installed...

Quadradeuce > The Dummy Gummy 10/27/2018 at 19:47

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It boggles the mind.  

Quadradeuce > atfsgeoff 10/27/2018 at 19:48

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The locks are more of a suggestion around here. None of the windows lock.  We avoid burglaries by not having anything worth stealing (unless you value books).  We've suspected people have used the place without us knowing.  "Huh, how did this recent magazine get here?"

WilliamsSW > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 20:19

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Ugh. That makes it hard to know who to say no to.

From the pictures it looks like a nice cozy place- enjoy the escape!

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 20:20

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Cut them all out or cut yourselves out. Shared/family properties suffer from the usual Freeloader Problem.

Quadradeuce > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 10/27/2018 at 21:10

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It was really bad when it was coowned.  Maintenance never got done due to labor and money issues.  We bought out a cousin and never looked back.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 21:19

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Sounds like you'll be buying out a few more

atfsgeoff > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 22:50

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In a perfect world, we wouldn’t need locks, and perfect strangers could put up for the night in your cabin and leave it in better condition than they left it as compensation for the lodging.

But then your ruining relatives enter the picture. They are why we can’t have nice things.

cbell04 > Quadradeuce 10/27/2018 at 23:51

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So rry your dealing with that. We have access to a beautiful remote cabin though family and could never imagine disrespecting it. No way to fix peopl e like that. Ban hammer time. In all seriousness even if you install cameras and digital locks with individual codes so you know who comes and goes your still a jerk in thier eyes for holding them accountable and they will likely just be more sneaky and spiteful. I’d pretend you had   a break in claim squatters moved in on the off season (no damage but a big mess) so you had to go next level on security and will be closely monitoring who comes and goes and make it very uncomfortable for the offending party but that will cost you get again. Good luck whatever you choose but don’t give up and let aholes win too many good memories at these kinds of places both past and the ones you've yet to make .

ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com > Quadradeuce 10/28/2018 at 00:00

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That is fine choice of IPA. I haven’t had a bad Founders beer yet.

Quadradeuce > cbell04 10/30/2018 at 10:51

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I will end up being the bad guy in the family if I take any aggressive measures. They see nothing wrong with their behavior, which is the hardest part to deal with.  It’s a no win situation, which is why I keep telling my mom to just use it for the whole summer so I can turn everyone away.

I’ve decided that I’m just going to reach out to the people who treat it properly to use it first, and then tell the abusers that it’s full for the summer. (Even though they’ve yelled at me in the past for “not giving us priority”, LOL).

functionoverfashion > Quadradeuce 11/01/2018 at 11:16

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While we’re not dealing with that level of disrespect, my wife and I are lucky enough to have three houses that are shared with family, none are a primary residence. I could go on and on about the various, ahem, challenges, that go along with this scenario. It’s not going to get easier as those in our parents’ generation get older, and are less able to do things and/or eventually pass away.

I wish you luck in this, and if you can put a stop to it before the place gets burned down or something, that will be a huge load off your shoulders.

A family I know nearly lost a 150 year old tiny cabin on a tiny island in a remote location because a family member was careless with a grill and nearly burned the place down. Luckily with the proximity of the water, they were able to put out the smoldering ember under the porch.

We also saved a huge old cabin on an island nearby a few years back, as some people had left a campfire smoldering over a weekend. Days later we were going by and noticed smoke, went to check it out, and the fire had smoldered underground via dead tree roots and 100 years of dry hemlock needles, and was creeping its way toward the house. With no rain in the forecast, the whole island likely would have burned if we hadn’t happened to notice.

So yeah. If these people are so careless, and there’s a woodstove there, I’d be concerned.