Going to do an incredibly unofficial 0-to-60 time in the shoebox

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck)
07/09/2017 at 17:10 • Filed to: I'm blue aba di aba die

You may now assault my with your predictions. Takin’ all bets! Who ya got?!? Winner gets a knuckle sammich. Remember: this thing is slower than your local DMV on a Tuesday afternoon.

DISCUSSION (40)

mazda616 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:10

I say 13 seconds even.

jasmits > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:12

Don’t forget your calendar

Maxima Speed > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:13

I don’t think it will be smart car slow so I’m gonna say, 14.65.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > jasmits
07/09/2017 at 17:13

JASMITS SELECTS ONE FORTNIGHT

Mini Guy- Now has a 4Runner > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:14

16-21 seconds

Seat Safety Switch > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:14

20 seconds flat.

AestheticsInMotion > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:15

It’s sorta light though right..? 12 seconds.

slipperysallylikespenguins > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:15

Serious guess is 17.6 seconds.

OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:16

12 seconds is my guess IF it can get to 60. Can it?

wafflesnfalafel > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:17

12.5 w/o doggo, 12.9 with doggo.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
07/09/2017 at 17:17

60, yes

75, still no

RallyDarkstrike - Fan of 2-cyl FIATs, Eastern Bloc & Kei cars > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:17

0-60? I’m going to guess.....14 seconds!

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:21

16.7

PS9 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:21

If you think this is how you’re going to get your wife on board with an AWD LS1 swap, you’re about to be sorely mistaken.

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:26

18 seconds

Please substitute the knuckle sammich with a Cuban sammich

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:29

24 hours

fintail > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:29

Sundial.

The fintail can pull it off in about 11.5-12, I think - I will guess 16 for this.

XJDano > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:35

Kinja'd!!!

This was the metro time taken with the torque app. So I’ll say 24.7

it is an automatic correct?

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:42

I feel I’m probably overestimating it, but I’m going with 16 seconds.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 17:46

14.3 seconds

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > XJDano
07/09/2017 at 17:52

5-speed

MM54 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 18:16

My guess would be a 27 second quarter mile at 65mph, so I’ll go with... about 20 seconds to 60?

TheHondaBro > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 18:41

Don’t thrash it too hard. If I ever buy that thing off you I don’t want it smelling like butter and lobster sauce.

HammerheadFistpunch > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 19:06

14.6

I have another burner, try to guess it! > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 19:07

1) You fixed it? Yay!!!

2) 17 seconds. And can I get a side of fries if I win?

promoted by the color red > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 19:16

10.5 seconds if you cheat and use 4-lo.

Spaceball-Two > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 20:23

18, assuming you didn’t have a big lunch and have regular bowel movements

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 21:37

0-60, when dreams come true.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
07/09/2017 at 21:38

I did a preliminary test earlier... the results were shocking

TO BE CONTINUED

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 21:40

I’ve got a lot of seat time in this car, and I know the excitement of speeding in a 35 zone.

Kiltedpadre > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 22:22

While I want to imply that the time will be slow enough to need to account for tectonic drift, I’ll give a real guess of just under 16 seconds.

The Crazy Kanuck; RIP Oppositelock > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/09/2017 at 23:37

A 5spd, such luxury.

The Snowman > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/10/2017 at 00:10

16.7

shop-teacher > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/10/2017 at 00:48

21 seconds.

RPM esq. > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
07/10/2017 at 00:56

That seems optimistic.

RPM esq. > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/10/2017 at 01:01

I bet 17.5 seconds if you run it up to redline for maximum powerrrrr, and like 20 if you shift like a normal human on an onramp.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > RPM esq.
07/10/2017 at 01:07

I don’t think it’s capable of redlining. I’ve tried.

RPM esq. > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
07/10/2017 at 01:51

Well, I don’t really know anything about this engine so maybe revving it that high wouldn’t help anyway...I guess I’ll stand by my guesstimate and/or range.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > RPM esq.
07/10/2017 at 01:53

It’s a SOHC 8-valve engine that made 63 HP.

OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > RPM esq.
07/10/2017 at 08:20

I regretted my answer immediately but will stick by it.