An American In Montreal

"Justin Hughes" (justinhughes54) 06/02/2016 at 15:46 • Filed to: montreal

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Canada is sometimes referred to as America’s hat. Many TV shows taking place in the US are actually filmed in Canada, and they look so similar that we are none the wiser. But Quebec is special, and traveling there really does feel like you’re visiting a different country.

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This is where the French first settled and lived until the Treaty of Paris transferred it to British rule in 1763. It may have been more than 250 years since then, but many Québécois are more reluctant to let go of their French heritage than some southern US residents are of letting go of the Confederacy. They even held referendums on secession from Canada in !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! and !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , and a separatist political party has remained active to this day. A family emergency swept me out of Massachusetts and suddenly dropped me into Montreal for nearly two weeks. It was a culture shock in many ways, including the driving culture there. Here’s what I learned in my crash course.

Bilingual = French

When it came time for me to take a foreign language in school, I had a choice between French and Spanish. My parents left the decision entirely up to me. After careful deliberation, I decided that I lived much closer to Quebec than to Mexico or places with significant Hispanic populations, and that I would be most interested in learning French. My parents disagreed and made me take Spanish.

Then I married a girl from Montreal. While I may have proven my parents wrong, I remain ill equipped to deal with street signs in Quebec. While Canada is officially bilingual, and you will find signs in both English and French throughout most of the country, in Quebec the signs are typically in French, and only French.

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It’s still possible for a non-French speaker like me to get around thanks to the use of standard signs and pictograms. There’s no question that a left arrow with a red circle and cross through it means no left turn, or that a red octagon that says “arrêt” means stop. Navigation can be a little tricky if you don’t know the French words for compass directions, but a little help from a GPS will get you where you need to go. I did need my wife’s help to translate the electronic signs on Boulevard Décarie to understand their traffic flow advisories. As you can see in this photo, they don’t call it the Décarie Parking Lot for nothing.

The Metric System

Don’t let this sign fool you into thinking you can scream down the autoroute at 100mph. As in the rest of the civilized world, the metric system rules here, and this sign limits you to a far more reasonable 62mph. There are no miles, feet, or yards here - it’s all kilometers and meters. (Though interestingly, some Canadians still prefer to think of temperature in Fahrenheit. It’s a more precise scale than Celsius, where 0 is freezing and 30 is a hot summer day.)

Personally, I have no problem making the switch. My !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! makes it easy with a button on the dashboard to switch my digital speedometer to metric. I also switch !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! in the Settings menu. In fact, I find the metric system much easier to use than the English system. It also makes the long drives seem to go by more quickly, as kilometers are shorter than miles. I don’t get why so many Americans are opposed to the metric system. I’d welcome it.

Radar Detectors Are Illegal

As much as I’ve enjoyed using the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , I left it home on this trip. It is illegal to use a radar detector in much of Canada, including Quebec. Though !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! for many years, I have to admit feeling a little bit naked without it. Though I didn’t see many speedtraps during my time there, I did run through a few - fortunately at 100km/h, not 100mph.

Terrible Roads

Photo credit: CTV News

The main reason we got the rental car was because we thought I was going to be heading home much sooner than my wife, and she would need her own wheels after I left. This turned out not to be the case, but we still had no regrets about renting the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! because it handled the horrible pothole filled roads of Montreal much better than my BRZ. Its stock suspension is still rather stiff, which is great on the track but not so good on bumpy roads. After our first trip to Westmount on The Boulevard we were both in literal pain. From that point on, we parked the BRZ and put the miles kilometers on the Mazda. It soaked up all but the worst bumps, and never caused us any pain.

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Incomprehensible Parking Regulations

It’s difficult enough to find parking in most any city. Montreal is no exception, and their parking regulations make it far more difficult than normal. On this particular road, parking is prohibited except for school buses from 7:00am to 8:30am, and 2:30pm to 3:30pm, Monday through Friday, from September 1 through June 30. On top of that, parking is also prohibited from 12:00pm through 2:30pm on Thursdays from April 1 through November 30 for street sweeping. This means that you can only park on this street for very brief periods of time during the week, especially Thursdays. This, plus a four hour limit for parking in this area (which is not indicated on any sign that I saw), makes it pretty much impossible to park anywhere for any useful period of time, even if you can decipher the word problems of parking regulations.

No Right Turn On Red

Image credit: The Main

That’s right - turning right on a red light is illegal on the entire island of Montreal. This includes not just the city of Montreal, but also a number of smaller municipalities on the island. So it makes no sense to stick your nose out into the intersection to see around other cars and make a run for it at a red light. You’ll get busted just as surely as if you ran straight across. And Montreal does use red light cameras.

But this actually isn’t as bad as it seems, because...

Green Arrows Work Differently There

Photo credit: Biker Law Blog

And no, I don’t mean a hooded figure with a bow running around at night telling bad guys “You have failed this city” in French. In the States, a green arrow may indicate that people going a certain direction have priority over others. They’re often used in conjunction with an ordinary green light. But in Quebec, a green arrow means that you may ONLY go in the direction of the arrow. If you’re waiting to make a right turn and the light changes from red to a green arrow pointing up, you’re still not allowed to go right, only straight. Only when you see either a green arrow pointing right or a green light with no arrow are you allowed to make your turn. I’ve seen this used to give pedestrians a chance to start crossing the road before turning cars that would cut them off are allowed to go.

Flashing Green Lights Are Actually Useful

Photo credit: Montreal Gazette

In the US, a flashing green light tells you you’re allowed to go, which you were already doing anyway, and is pretty much completely useless. But in Montreal, a flashing green light is a happy thing. It means that you may go while oncoming traffic is stopped, enabling you to make a left turn with ease. This can indicate either an advanced or delayed green. I think this is a really nifty way to convey this information with no need for additional lights.

Excellent Traffic Light Designs

I have some friends who are color blind. They can’t tell the difference between red and green, which is pretty important at a traffic light. It’s not a problem with vertical lights, but horizontal ones can make it impossible for them to tell whether they’re red or green. I have never seen this problem addressed as well as I did in Montreal. For one thing, there are two red lights rather than one. Even if you see no color at all, you can tell the two outboard lights are lit, which means stop. On top of that, the lights are different shapes. Red lights are square, yellow lights are diamond, and green lights are round. So if a light isn’t red, the shape of it will tell you whether you can safely proceed or whether you should be stopping for the red that is about to follow. Utterly brilliant.

No Front License Plates

Our !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! looked great, in part because it had no front plate tacked to the front of it like an ugly afterthought. Front plates are ugly on most cars, but are not issued in Quebec, requiring only one plate on the back.

Porsches Are As Common As VWs

The roads may be terrible, but there are a LOT of sweet cars in Montreal. Porsches, in particular, are more popular there than anywhere else I’ve seen in recent history. I didn’t even see this many Porsches at my last track day. They might as well be Volkswagens for how common they are. It actually became a game to count how many we saw each day, and if I had a Loonie ($1 coin) for every Porsche I saw I could probably afford to buy one. Our daily counts, on the days we played, were 7, 8, 7, 22, 25, 6, and, 12.

The selection wasn’t limited to Porsches, either. Ferraris, like this one, were uncommon but not unusual to see in our travels. Bentleys were also rather popular. We also saw a few Maseratis, an Ariel Atom, and a Mercedes-AMG GT S. Speaking of Mercedes, they were so common they might as well have been Fords.

And The Food

OK, it’s not related to driving, but I have to talk about the food. I’m no foodie. I typically handle food like a pit stop - stop, refuel as quickly as possible, and I’m outta there. But the food in Montreal is just so good! I’d already been turned on to poutine, pictured above in a pulled pork variation, enough to buy my wife a deep fryer so she could make the proper kind of fries it requires. We ate at !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , a Montreal fixture, a number of times, and caught the tail end of their famous weekly !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! one night. (I’ll definitely check it out more closely during a future visit.) And the bagels. I don’t even want American bagels anymore after having the Montreal variety. I even brought some back home with me to hold me until my next visit. I’m glad I’m not in the habit of weighing myself, because if I did I’m sure I’d be depressed about an increase after eating my way across Montreal.

One Day, I Shall Come Back

Due to the circumstances and family commitments of our visit, there’s a lot I didn’t have a chance to see. I’d hoped to meet up with RFD’s Montreal correspondent, !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , but sadly our schedules didn’t line up. He had hoped to show me some fun driving roads on the South Shore, as well as !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , where the Formula 1 race takes place. A little bit to the north is !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , another excellent track. We’re already talking about taking my wife’s kids back to visit sometime in August. I may take my motorcycle and go exploring.

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CB > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 15:51

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On your bilingualism bit, the official language of Quebec is French, and they actually have a language police that go around and enforce that. I think the only officially bilingual province is New Brunswick, although the territories have multiple official languages.

But yeah, Montreal is pretty great (except for driving in). Was there a few weeks ago with my girlfriend and had a great time. If you’re bringing kids, go check out the Biodome next time you visit.

Anon > CB 06/02/2016 at 15:55

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Can you elaborate more on the language police?

PotbellyJoe and 42 others > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 15:55

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When I worked in tandem with an office in Montreal, every conference call started with “Bonjour. Bienvenue...” for them because the etiquette (might be law, not sure) for businesses is ‘French First.’

As for them being America’s Hat, there are some who see America as Canada’s scranus.

Justin Hughes > CB 06/02/2016 at 16:00

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Officially, the entire country is bilingual thanks to the Official Languages Act . But in practice, what you said. Parts of Cape Breton Island, Nova Scotia, are bilingual, except it’s English and Gaelic rather than French!

Justin Hughes > PotbellyJoe and 42 others 06/02/2016 at 16:00

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I can’t argue with that...

CB > Anon 06/02/2016 at 16:02

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Bill 101 was established in order to make French the official language of the province. The Office québécois de la langue française was established to monitor businesses and making sure they are offering services in French and that French was being used commonly in day to day situation, and businesses that receive complaints can receive fines between $500 and $1500 .

Luc - The Acadian Oppo > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 16:02

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BJ is totally right. Quebec is NOT Bilingual it is strictly French. New-Brunswick is the only officially bilingual province in the country. In NB the signs will be both french and english. In quebec only French and everywhere else only English.

CB > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 16:05

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While that is the case, individual provinces also have the ability to declare their own official languages. For example, Bill 22 in Quebec established French as the sole official language for the province . The Northwest Territories have eleven officially recognized languages .

ChooChooMotherFudger > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 16:14

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In the US, a flashing green light tells you you’re allowed to go, which you were already doing anyway, and is pretty much completely useless.

Wait what? As a Canadian who has driven in the States many times, what does this mean? Is a flashing green light not always an advanced green?

Justin Hughes > ChooChooMotherFudger 06/02/2016 at 16:19

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Nope. I’d never heard of such a concept until my wife explained it to me in Montreal.

Wacko > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 16:21

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the thing about montreal is that’s its people are basically 50%french and 50% english(includes everything but french)

normally they serve you in english first.

the rest of quebec on the other hand is 90-95% french. Like my hometown, Rouyn-Noranda is 96% french.

that being said, is the reason my quebec is a French provence. Since basically(very quick math here) 75% of the population is french, and 25% english and others.

I actually live in quebec by choice, since most english or bilinguals leave our regions for montreal or other provinces. From my graduating class in 96, we are 2 of 12 that stayed here.

Great article BTW

not for canada - australian in disguise > PotbellyJoe and 42 others 06/02/2016 at 16:26

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Alaska is Canada’s hat, America is the pants, Mexico is the legs, and Florida is the dick.

ChooChooMotherFudger > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 16:26

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So what does a flashing green mean in the states?

I have driven in Florida and the northeast of the states a few times and never noticed.

Justin Hughes > Wacko 06/02/2016 at 16:27

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Thanks! I’m glad to hear from a Québécois that I got at least most of it right. :)

I can definitely see the Franco/Anglo split you’re talking about, both in Montreal and in other areas. In Montreal we were often greeted “Bonjour, hello” - French first, but also a polite option for English. But at a restaurant we went to on our way to the Laurentians I was the only one who ordered in English. Fortunately the waitress was very kind and accomodating. I think my wife warned her that I’m American.

Mid Engine > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 16:28

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I lived in Montreal for 50 years and will be returning for a visit next week, can’t wait! The drivers in Quebec have absolutely no regard for speed limits, nor do they care about pesky things like one way streets, or sidewalks. Traffic laws are simply a suggestion, as such they don’t much care. God help you if you camp out in the left hand lane though! Oh, be careful where you park, they have parking cops (lovingly referred to as “green onions”) whose sole purpose is to write parking tickets. One last thought on driving: I’ve always thought it was idiocy to have all the road signs in French, what if some tourist from Boston is in town? Leave it to the government to screw up something so basic.

I’ll be sure to get some smoked meat at Smoke Meat Petes and Schwartzs, definitely score some bagels @ St. Viateur, and scarf on the best sub in town @ Bocci’s in LaSalle. This time of year all the bars and restaurants have outdoor seating, chilling out on a terrasse is a national sport. And you’ll wanna sit on a terrasse so you can watch all the smoking hot women stream by, must be something they put in the water.

Justin Hughes > ChooChooMotherFudger 06/02/2016 at 16:29

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Go. Nothing more. You don’t see it much, but when you do, it’s someplace where you’re already unlikely to stop anyway. It’s pretty much a complete waste of resources here.

Justin Hughes > Mid Engine 06/02/2016 at 16:33

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As some tourist from Boston, I agree about the signs! And yes, I noticed that the lane markings were vague suggestions of where people actually drove. I won’t say anything negative about my wife’s driving while we were there, only that she was much better in that environment than I was! Though neither of us interpreted the parking signs adequately to avoid one ticket. We were a bit distracted at the time and not paying close enough attention.

I’ll be taking notes on your suggested stops (already knew about Schwartz’s) for our next trip, which will hopefully be more planned and relaxing.

Mid Engine > Anon 06/02/2016 at 17:51

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Road signs are in French only, business can have bilingual signage so long as the French type is 2x the size of the English.. i.e. French is in 20pt, the English equivalent is in 10pt. When hiring in Quebec you’re supposed to make sure the person can speak French, if they can say boujours that’s good enough. Business meetings and the like are supposed to be conducted in French but no one really worries about that too much, unless you have a disgruntled employee rat you out to the OLF. A bunch of rules that are routinely ignored, but do you really expect a government program would be enthusiastically implemented?

ranwhenparked > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 19:12

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Canada is bilingual, Quebec is not.

Wacko > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 19:18

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I’m québécois, but a Canadian first.

And btw. Montreal is like no other place in North America. It’s completely different than the rest of North America. It has a European atmosphere, an incredible night life.

I’m just not a big city boy. I lived in Montreal when I was in college in 96-97, until I quit to come back home. I guess I like driving to much to be there. Where a 1 hour drive gets you 15-30 Kms. When here a 1 hour drive you actually get 100 Kms. I manage IT and many other thing for an insurance company here with 8 offices, and I got a hour drive between each office. I live in the middle, about an hour from all offices.

Justin Hughes > Wacko 06/02/2016 at 20:09

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Sounds wonderful! When I get my motorcycle out there I’ll have to find some fun roads to ride.

Nauraushaun > Justin Hughes 06/02/2016 at 23:15

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It sounds like a weird cross between America and Australia :)

What makes the Farenheit system more precise?

Flavien Vidal > Justin Hughes 06/03/2016 at 07:24

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Canada is bilingual, but Quebec has a different status from other provinces and the sole and only official language is french. It just happen that 51% of Montreal inhabitants are anglophones. That’s only the case for Montreal though. The rest of Quebec is francophone by a huge majority.

Cool to read your article! I’m french but I’ve lived for about 8 years in Montreal. Fun to look at your pictures as I know where most have been taken haha :)

Justin Hughes > Nauraushaun 06/03/2016 at 09:16

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The difference between each degree F is a lot less than each degree C. While the difference between freezing and a hot summer day is between 0-30C, it’s 32-86F - a difference of 54 degrees rather than 30.

Though I do agree with the logic of a temperature measurement system where 0 is the freezing point of water and 100 is the boiling point.

Justin Hughes > Flavien Vidal 06/03/2016 at 09:18

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Thanks! I sit corrected on that point. There are many anglophones in Montreal, including my wife.

So being French yourself, how much of an adjustment did you have to make between French French and Canadian French? Is it comparable to the differences between American and British English?

Flavien Vidal > Justin Hughes 06/03/2016 at 09:38

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Nah, not that much really, but probably because I had just spent a few years in the US before coming to QC... Quebecquois are quite a bit americanized and much closer to americans than to french. Sure there is the language and they have an attachment to their origins that americans don’t really have, but overall, in their day to day life, they definitely are north americans :)

Keep in mind I’m talking about Montreal francophone Quebecquois here though... Quebecquois outside of Montreal are quite a bit different. They don’t look at NYC, thinking it’s the next best thing after poutine for exemple. Outside of Montreal, Quebecquois are extremely friendly, a bit rough on the edges, rednecky but not too much. I love QC!

In Montreal it’s different, the youth of le Plateau wish they lived in Brooklyn, while the youth of Peel wish they were in Manhattan, while the youth of Hochelaga-Maisonneuve wish they had a proper job and a full night sleep.

After 8 years, I’d say I was happy to leave Montreal though. 6 months winters, daily driving a Corvette with massive snow tires, going by with it but not really enjoying it half of the year ( article here: http://oppositelock.kinja.com/living-with-a-… ) I was happy to move to Japan, in a place where I have to drive 1 hour to go surf and 1.5 hour to go snowboarding, having to deal with 1 morning of snow every year :)

I also make a better living here than in Montreal so there is that.... Oh, and no potholes. Really guys, stop paying the mafia to do your streets. They suck at it. Make some good thick fucking roads that don’t crack instead of just putting a new 5cm layer on top of the holes every two years. That was fucking annoying lol...

I am an expert in reading those parking signs though ;)

Justin Hughes > Flavien Vidal 06/03/2016 at 09:51

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Great post! I can’t imagine taking my BRZ to Montreal in the winter, even though I have good snow tires. I imagine the Corvette probably soaked up the potholes better than my car. Then again, so would a skateboard! We’ll be taking my wife’s Ford Flex in the future. More difficult to park since it’s bigger, but it’ll handle the environment much better.

So if I take a crash online course in French, I may not be learning quite the right kind of French, but it’ll be close enough to communicate - or, at least, make an honest effort, then fall back on English after impressing people that an American at least tried. :)

Nauraushaun > Justin Hughes 06/03/2016 at 20:00

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Fair enough. I feel that 1 degree celsius is imperceptible anyway, so it’s never concerned me. I’m a big metric fan

Wrong Wheel Drive (41%) > Justin Hughes 06/10/2016 at 14:59

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Yup, reading it here was the first time I have ever heard of that. Ive done some driving in Ontario but I guess their roads are more Americanized. I definitely would not have started going until people behind me honked at me. Since I would assume no arrow means the other side also has a green. Left turns in general are foreign to me anyways since Im in NJ.

Wrong Wheel Drive (41%) > Justin Hughes 06/10/2016 at 15:02

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Do they do the flashing yellow light thing like in Europe? I really enjoyed that while driving in Italy that while at a red light, the yellow light will blink like a drag strip Christmas tree before turning green. Also, I am curious why Canada didn’t pick up the European trend of roundabouts everywhere. Definitely changed my world of driving while overseas!

Justin Hughes > Wrong Wheel Drive (41%) 06/10/2016 at 22:53

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Unfortunately no. It would be nice to have the warning to get back into gear before it turned green.