I might have lost my drivers license.

"My citroen won't start" (lucasboechat)
08/18/2015 at 15:30 • Filed to: None

Damn you speed tickets and that time I accidentally parked the Range Rover in the bike lane by accident.

EDIT: I am a complete asshole but our bike lanes work as normal lanes in alternate schedules, so let’s say from 10pm to 7am it works as parking spots/normal lane and in the other time of day it works as bike lanes, I had forgotten I parked there and spent the night at a friends house.

DISCUSSION (44)

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:38

Well, that’s unfortunate.

Manic Otti > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:39

We have a law here where if you get 3 tickets in an 18 month period they yank your license for 30 days, even if you get them all at once. It’s a stupid law and doen’t make any difference to safety.

TheHondaBro > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:41

I accidentally parked the Range Rover in the bike lane by accident.

So if you accidentally parked it by accident, then that means the accident was an accident, which means it was a double accident. A double accident only occurs when an accident accidentally accidents like the accident was another accident.

Accident accident accident accident accident accident accident accident accident.

Milky > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:41

You said accident twice, I don’t believe you.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > Manic Otti
08/18/2015 at 15:41

That’s almost as dumb as our rule that if you lose traction or travel 50km/h over our absurdly low speed limits, you get slapped with the charge of ‘Street Racing.’

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:44

What’s the problem? Don’t the cops drive around in old Beetles there?

ttyymmnn > TheHondaBro
08/18/2015 at 15:44

Yo dawg.....

ttyymmnn > Milky
08/18/2015 at 15:44

It was an accident.

DrScientist > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
08/18/2015 at 15:46

when i was getting my license the number was 30mph over any speed limit would result in loss of license (maybe 30 days, maybe a year, i forget exactly), and could result in jail time.

this was in PA a long time ago, not sure if that is still the case

djmt1 > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:46

Not to insult Brazil but I’m surprised your police give enough of a shit to do that.

Sneaky Pete > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:51

Stop getting tickets.

Milky > ttyymmnn
08/18/2015 at 15:55

Clearly very accident.

My citroen won't start > Sneaky Pete
08/18/2015 at 15:58

I can’t the new 50 km/h everywhere limit annoys me.

My citroen won't start > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
08/18/2015 at 15:58

And clearly my fault.

MultiplaOrgasms > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 15:58

How does one get speeding tickets in a damn Range Rover? Also if you park in a bike lane “by accident” you are a douchebag who deserves to have his license seized. And no I don’t care if you were just grabbing some cash at a bank or waiting for a mate, parking on a bike lane is easily avoidable.

BeaterGT > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
08/18/2015 at 16:05

How about in NJ where if someone cuts you off (a cop), you get a tailgating ticket which is 5 points. Welcome to my life.

ttyymmnn > Milky
08/18/2015 at 16:12

Actually, I didn’t mean to type that.

My citroen won't start > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
08/18/2015 at 16:13

They have 1 liter econoboxes but a shit ton of speed cameras.

My citroen won't start > djmt1
08/18/2015 at 16:13

Police here is shit when it comes to investigating crimes and fucking ace when it gives them revenue.

My citroen won't start > Milky
08/18/2015 at 16:14

Yes.

My citroen won't start > Manic Otti
08/18/2015 at 16:15

Here we have a max of 20 points in a 12 month period, medium infractions are 4 points, grave infractions are 5 points and extremely grave are 7 points.

My citroen won't start > TheHondaBro
08/18/2015 at 16:15

It was dark ok??

My citroen won't start > MultiplaOrgasms
08/18/2015 at 16:18

Our bike lanes are normal car lanes but with specific time schedules, so between 22:00 and 7:00 am it works as parking spaces/lane, and after that it works as a bike lane. I forgot I had parked in such lane, and spent the night at a friends house, when I woke up, bike lane. Also I can’t stand driving 50km/h in express lanes and they had new speed traps.

TheHondaBro > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 16:20

I’m getting anxiety just thinking about your bike lanes.

MultiplaOrgasms > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 16:22

How inconvenient.

My citroen won't start > MultiplaOrgasms
08/18/2015 at 16:24

Completely my fault, I did’t plan on spending the night there but I got drunk, so I decided to leave in the morning.

Tohru > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 16:28

You don’t need a license to drive. Just a license to be seen by the police driving.

My citroen won't start > Tohru
08/18/2015 at 16:29

That’s how my mother thinks, I think I’ll transfer some of my points to someone else, maybe my dad or his driver.

MultiplaOrgasms > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 16:38

The speeding thing I can understand to an extent, there is a stretch of road where I live with small groups of one to five houses loosely scattered alongside it. Thing is local authorities count that as one village, meaning a 50kph speed limit for the entire stretch of road. Of course there is no indication for that anywhere, which leads most people to believe this is a normal open road with a 100kph speed limit. The speeding tickets are plentiful and expensive to say the least. My dad nearly got his license revoked due to that, but his employer bailed him out of it as he works in a fairly important position. #whitepeopleprivileges

Still, shame on you for not knowing your traffic regulations.

wiffleballtony > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 16:41

Ugh, our residential streets are 45 mph. Which means most people do 55. I can’t imagine 50 kph.

My citroen won't start > MultiplaOrgasms
08/18/2015 at 16:42

Oh I know the speed limit, I just don’t respect them. The bike lane thing was totally my fault, I’m not against them or cyclists, I think we need more of them.

My citroen won't start > wiffleballtony
08/18/2015 at 16:46

Now imagine 50 kph in a express lane.

Kinja'd!!!

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 16:49

So, just like American ones.

The last police force I trust in the Americas is the RCMP.

TheOnelectronic > Eric @ opposite-lock.com
08/18/2015 at 17:06

From what I’ve heard, no. American cops are shining angels of truth and justice compared to Brazilian.

My citroen won't start > Milky
08/18/2015 at 17:06

I wanted to make sure everybody understood it was accidentally an accident.

wiffleballtony > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 17:08

That’s stupid.

Officer Jim Lahey is not a real cop > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 17:41

I’m not a big Jim Carrey fan, and I don’t actually think you’re an asshole, but relevant:

Kinja'd!!!

Hope it all gets worked out!

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > TheOnelectronic
08/18/2015 at 18:11

Alternate reality, maybe? They only care when it makes them money or when it involves shooting unarmed people (because they have a harder time making an excuse for it).

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 20:03

Maybe what you need is a Citroen 2CV...

My citroen won't start > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
08/18/2015 at 20:04

Maybe....

Vicente Esteve > My citroen won't start
08/18/2015 at 23:49

SO LATIN AMERICA

pip bip - choose Corrour > My citroen won't start
08/19/2015 at 06:20

been there done that , got caught too.

My citroen won't start > pip bip - choose Corrour
08/19/2015 at 10:09

It sucks.

pip bip - choose Corrour > My citroen won't start
08/20/2015 at 05:15

couldn’t agree more!