"TheHondaBro" (wwaveform)
05/28/2015 at 11:36 • Filed to: driving assholes
7
36|
"TheHondaBro" (wwaveform)
05/28/2015 at 11:36 • Filed to: driving assholes | 7
| 36 |
All the driving-related stuff that irritates me.
If I’m stopped at an intersection on an incline, don’t pull up right behind me. Even though I drive an automatic, I will roll back, thanks to GRAVITY!! Don’t get mad if my car hits your car.
Relating to the first one, if I start pulling forward a little bit, don’t see that as an opportunity to fill the gap by continuously pulling closer to me. No, the line won’t progress faster the closer you are to my groceries, and I just don’t want to be rear-ended by a moron.
Holy shit don’t weave through the traffic doing 30MPH over the speed limit. Someone in a yellow Honda Fit was doing this recently. We wound up stopped at the same intersections at the same times. Ironic, no?
Maybe take consideration to traffic that has the right of way? For god sakes, you have the stop sign, I DON’T!! Don’t turn on to my road, I almost hit you, moron.
buford-t-justice
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:39 |
|
Turning into the wrong lane, from a left hand or right hand turn.
Milky
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:41 |
|
Obligatory
Party-vi
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:41 |
|
I’m pulling up right behind you to make sure you don’t roll back too far. I’m like your automotive safety net.
I fill the gap behind you to make sure no one can take pictures of your license plate and scam you online.
I weave through traffic at high speeds to draw the attention of the cops away from you so you don’t get pulled over.
I roll through stop signs to make sure your brakes are working and your reflexes are good.
I’m just your friendly neighborhood Spiderman Asshole Driver.
Mattbob
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:44 |
|
how much do you really roll back? I roll back at the most, a few inches, usually not at all.
|
TheHondaBro
> Party-vi
05/28/2015 at 11:45 |
|
|
TheHondaBro
> Milky
05/28/2015 at 11:46 |
|
Pretty sure that bubbly Taurus isn’t a race car.
|
TheHondaBro
> Mattbob
05/28/2015 at 11:47 |
|
My car tends to roll back a few inches, but considering how close some people get to my ass, that’s enough.
nermal
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:47 |
|
If there is a queue at the Starbucks to get coffee, you need to fall in line.
If five people order ahead of you, you go from the order line, to standing behind the person that ordered right before you did in the pickup line.
DO NOT GO STAND AT THE FRONT OF THE PICKUP COUNTER AND LOOK AT EVERY DRINK THAT COMES OUT LIKE A MORAN BECAUSE IT ISN’T YOUR’S!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!1!
They make the drinks in order! You standing in front of the five people that ordered in front of you will not make them make your drink any faster, it will only make the others look at you like the idito that you are for standing there. Then you have to GTFO the way while everybody else gets their drink ahead of you.
Ugh!
OPPOsaurus WRX
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:51 |
|
when I see someone do #2 (on your list not the other thing) I pull up a foot, wait for them to fill the gap, pull up another foot, wait, and repeat til I run out of room.
|
TheHondaBro
> OPPOsaurus WRX
05/28/2015 at 11:53 |
|
THE LINES GONNA GO FASTUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:55 |
|
1-4. Fuck you, I’m a bear.
I agree with all these. However I would add to #3 if they had time to go around the people in front had time to move over. Not condoning the actions of the Fit (30MPH faster is pretty stupid), just saying as a note to the people who are habitually in the way.
5. The pedestrian countdown timer is FOR PEDESTRIANS. It does not mean start slowing down so you are at a stop before the light goes yellow.
6. The lane which starts at the end of the cloverleaf is called an acceleration lane . Use it. I don’t care what happens to your MPG, put your foot down and get in traffic properly.
7. Yield does not mean stop.
8. You don’t need to sit in the left lane just behind and beside the semi in the next lane over. If your so terrified of going by, either rug it or get in behind, you’re safer in either of those places, AND you aren’t holding people up.
|
Milky
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 11:57 |
|
Every car is race car if you drive it right.
|
TheHondaBro
> Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
05/28/2015 at 11:57 |
|
Oh my god #6 in California was torture. PEOPLE JUST WOULDN’T MERGE!!!!
|
Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
> buford-t-justice
05/28/2015 at 11:59 |
|
And then flipping off the people who honk.
|
TheHondaBro
> nermal
05/28/2015 at 12:01 |
|
Sure, I guess.
Sweet Trav
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 12:04 |
|
Yes, yes it is.
|
Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 12:05 |
|
I actually do agree with this, to some extent. If the lanes are constantly moving, the reactions tend to be faster when the light goes green. However a buffer of, say around 2’, if still needed you can start rolling and begin to accelerate at almost the same time as the person in front without worrying about hitting them. Pulling up within inches just slows you down in the end, since it makes this impossible.
BigBlock440
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 12:05 |
|
I’m impressed that people can get close enough that you might actually hit them on a rollback. (I’m assuming you’re not driving a semi because you said car)
|
Sweet Trav
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 12:06 |
|
Anyone who does more that 15 mph in a parking lot that isn’t hosting an autocross. Seriously there are kids and people walking everywhere, don’t Drive like a prick and hurt someone or bang up a car because you had to get to Walgreens .03 seconds faster.
cornerslide
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 12:15 |
|
Every single one of these screams, mememememe first. These people seem to go through life that way and are somewhat frustrated all the time. At this point I just don’t let there frustration become mine.
Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 12:25 |
|
Unfortunately there are probably some people who still don’t know what gravity is. Or think it’s not real because religion.
MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner
> buford-t-justice
05/28/2015 at 12:30 |
|
nailed it, that’s probably my biggest rage moment
Klaus Schmoll
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 12:36 |
|
Handbrake? Like somebody should have taught you?
Sir_Stig: and toxic masculinity ruins the party again.
> nermal
05/28/2015 at 13:03 |
|
Stapleface-Now Hyphenated!
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 13:34 |
|
Another to add to the list. Don’t hang out in blind spots. My wife does this and drives me up a wall. Why put yourself somewhere you can’t be seen?!
|
TheHondaBro
> Stapleface-Now Hyphenated!
05/28/2015 at 13:37 |
|
That’s why I never pass a semi truck unless there’s room for me in front of it.
CaptDale - is secretly British
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 13:55 |
|
No they don’t and it fucking kills me!!!! I have a car and I hit 70 on the on ramp when its clear just to better merge with he real speed of traffic. Though it may surprise you the speed limit in the freeway is not 35 mph.
|
Stapleface-Now Hyphenated!
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 14:00 |
|
Yeah, it’s amazing what good drivers truckers are. I rode in a cab of one once, and was astounded by how little you could see around you.
|
TheHondaBro
> Stapleface-Now Hyphenated!
05/28/2015 at 14:01 |
|
I have so much respect for truck drivers. They have to drive long distances with limited visibility in a vehicle much larger than everything else on the road.
Trevor Slattery, ACTOR
> Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
05/28/2015 at 14:47 |
|
#6 for real man! It is called an accelerator pedal for a reason! You are not going to hurt you car by revving the engine to 4000rpm to merge. Trust us, you car will be fine.
norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback
> Sweet Trav
05/28/2015 at 15:18 |
|
rekt
NJAnon
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 18:27 |
|
Its a free for all in the US. So defensive driving doesn’t even work. Its humanly impossible to drive defensively against a senior citizen with onset Alzheimers, someone riding the brake, someone not knowing they are going, someone with GPS on and doesn’t know how to use it and not knowing where they are going, someone who has no job and drives slow to be a douche, someone who hates their job so they don’t really care about anyone else on the road, someone who is too scared their car will have a leaf fall on it so they drive 15mph, someone on the phone and suddenly crosses 3 lanes to make a turn?
I see why that person in the Honda Fit was speeding;
to get away from it all!
wiffleballtony
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 19:32 |
|
One that really gets me is that when I’m leaving safe distance between me and the person in front of me, it’s taken as an invitation to get in front of me. And then brake and/or slow down.
|
TheHondaBro
> wiffleballtony
05/28/2015 at 19:34 |
|
Yep that happened to me one time. No blinkers too. Shouted at the driver at the next intersection.
|
wiffleballtony
> buford-t-justice
05/28/2015 at 19:35 |
|
I can’t count the number of times I’ve almost been side swiped by someone making a left and going wide.
|
wiffleballtony
> TheHondaBro
05/28/2015 at 19:40 |
|
Happens to me at least three times every morning. Usually by an SUV.