I've Completley Re-Written My Craigslist Ad

"JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!" (jqj213)
11/12/2014 at 10:02 • Filed to: craigslist, ad, volvo, vikkie, v70R

In an effort to sell my Volvo, I have done a complete 180 and changed my ad. Let me know what you think! I don't have it on CL yet but want your opions of the ad itself. Thanks!

My Owner Doesn't Love Me Anymore

Hello there potential soulmate! My name is Vikkie and I am a 15 year old Volvo V70 R AWD sport wagon. I love long drives by the beach and road trips and am looking for someone to love me and treat me right. My current owner has lost the love he once had for me. I don't know what I did to upset him but he went and got a new car; a Honda Civic and no longer gives me the love I deserve. I barely get driven now. But I assure you I am just as quick and sporty now as I was when I left Gothenburg, Sweden.

I've had a rough life. Back in 2012, some men stole me from my owner. I went missing for a little over a month and the insurance company was sure I was a goner. Luckily, the police department found me in one piece on the opposite coast. Unfortunately, the state punished me and gave me a record. It's in bold font right on my title: REBUILT. But please don't let that scare you. I was never totaled or wrecked. Allstate even gave me full insurance coverage with no premium for being rebuilt. They treat me like everyone else. I still love being driven and pushed. There are few feelings better than letting all five cylinders fire up and having that turbo kick in and flying past everyone. The looks I get from the kids in their Mustangs and Camaros when I fly by is priceless.

My owner did spoil me a bit. He got me brand new Dunlop high performance tires. They are some of the best shoes for me and really help me show off. He also got them aligned so I track straight every time. My oil was just changed not even 300 miles ago. He got me brand new lights so I can see great at night now. I have very nice RainX Contour wiper blades so rain isn't a problem for me. My interior is spotless. My two tone suede and leather seats have no rips or tears. All my interior lights work and even my popout cup holders still work! My air conditioning blows ice cold! My upgraded sound system is super powerful and clear. I have power everything including seats, windows, locks, and sunroof; all of which work perfectly. I have no lights on my dashboard and drive perfectly. My five speed automatic is nice and smooth. My 2.3 Litre turbocharged five cylinder purrs but when given a little throttle will open up and scare everyone around you. I only have 131,000 miles on me. I can hold five people with ease and all of their stuff! I have so much room in the back and love when you load me up. My rear seats fold flat if you need to haul even bigger things like that new flatscreen TV or dresser. I am just as practical as that SUV or truck, but way more sporty! I also have all wheel drive and will keep you planted; even in the worst weather. I am also a Volvo; one of the safest cars on the road. I am full of airbags and will keep you and your family safe.

Sadly I am not perfect though. I still need a little bit of love to be perfect. My rear wiper motor died a few weeks ago in heavy rain. My front bumper is white and from one of my sibling's S70. One of my previous owners wasn't careful with me and hit something; I'm kind of foggy on what though and don't know for sure. When I was stolen, the men stole my three disc CD player. I still play cassettes though! My owner used one of those adapters to play his tunes right off of his phone. With a little bit of your love I could be perfect again.

Won't you please come at least give me a look? I want someone new to buy me and give me the love I deserve. I have had it rough these past few years and just want to settle down with someone who will love me for what I am: a rare sports wagon. I promise to be reliable and do everything you ask of me. They say you can't buy love but for $3,000 you can buy me… and I have so much love to give. Please let me be the same great car I was when I left Sweden in 2000. Please give me a chance.

My owner can be reached by text, e-mail, or phone calls and he promises to get back to you as soon as possible. He can answer any other questions you might have about me. I look forward to meeting you and going on that nice long drive!

DISCUSSION (10)

EL_ULY > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 10:05

Needs more BECAUSE RACECAR but good overall :] I'd take it off your hands if you lived down here in Tex-Mexville.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > EL_ULY
11/12/2014 at 10:06

Thanks! I want something kinda clever that may get shared around and also have a lot of people clicking on it

PilotMan > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 10:17

Make sure you get better pics, the hazey look is not good for that ol Volvo.

Your boy, BJR > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 10:22

"Volvo Wagon- Will trade for drugs

Got a fast Volvo wagon perfect for a road trip. I'd rather go on a different kind of trip though so this is up for grabs for a pound of drugs. Doesn't even matter what kind!

Send me a text saying "Volvo", and I'll call you from a pay phone to discuss the details.

Will also take $3000 cash."

Here's how you should do it.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 10:27

one problem. No one reads a CL ad with more than 5 sentences.

Mattbob > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 10:34

tl;dr

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 10:48

Where is your ad at? Also, how much are you asking? And also, does she have Manuel?

Hiroku > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 11:58

Have you tried advertising it in Volvo enthusiast forums like Swedespeed, Turbobricks, etc? I'm sure someone would take that off your hands in no time.

AM3R > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 15:24

"my owner doesn't love me anymore" —-> I'm boring and require a lot of work is what most non enthusiasts are gonna interpret that as.

Not bad overall, a little long but good.

m-b-w loves his SUBAROO > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
11/12/2014 at 16:36

It's like a pet adoption ad. I love it.