My Moment of Weakness: Buying a 2000 Volvo V70R

"JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!" (jqj213) 11/11/2014 at 10:06 • Filed to: learning, vikkie, mistakes, regret, volvo, v70R

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We are all guilty of it. We browse Craigslist all the time, searching for "it". We all have one car that we hunt for. We all have that one car that we always joke about buying instantly if it showed up at the right price. That was the case with Vikkie: my 2000 Volvo V70R. I bought her during a moment of weakness in my life. I thought she would make me happy. It didn't. This is the story of admitting defeat and learning from your mistakes. This is a warning to all you opponauts out there.

A little bit of backstory. My name is Justin and I have an addiction. I am addicted to everything automotive. I am 16 years old, still in high school, now working two jobs to make ends meet. I was not gifted anything. I pay for both my cars, the insurance, and other things like most of my food and my cell phone bill and my clothes. I also give back to my parents to help them out. I have been working since I was 14 years old to try and help them out. I have not had a very easy life by any means.

When I was about 15 and a half, I began making the gear head's biggest decision ever: the first car. I spent hours a day browsing Craigslist ads. I sent hundreds if not thousands of texts and emails to sellers throughout my area. I had no real restrictions: just a budget of around $5,000 and a need to be an automatic. This was because I would have to share this car with my grandma (she was loaning me about half of that money). I looked at everything from a Honda Element to a Volvo C70 to a Camry. Nothing really seemed right.

One day, very early into the search, I found something for $6,000. It was beautiful. A black 1998 Volvo V70R. It was a one owner gem with around 120,000 miles. I was hooked on the car. But before I could even do anything, it was gone. I lost this car. It was essentially my first dream car. But I kept looking. I drove a 240, a Mercedes C class, Honda Passport, a Saab 9-5, none of which were right.

I ended up with something not used. It was brand new: only 24 miles on the odometer. She was a 2013 Honda Civic LX Sedan in Polished Metal Metallic with the five speed automatic. A lease. Grandma decided that this was the better, more reliable choice. On one hand, I had a brand new car. It had Bluetooth, a backup camera, room for my friends, and a warranty. It smelt new; I was the first owner. But, it was a Civic. It was just… boring. I will never have a problem with it, but it just is somewhat dull. So I kept looking.

About one month ago, I found my dream car again on Craigslist. This time, a 2000 Volvo V70R for only $2,000. I had been saving my money from working and still wanted a second car. This car, from the pictures seemed nearly perfect. I had to drive it. So I contacted the seller and scheduled a test drive.

It should also be noted that around this time, I began suffering with my rather severe depression. I had hit a rough patch in my life. Nothing was going my way. I began getting lonely and felt worthless and useless. I had feelings that no one really cared for me at all. I was dangerous. I had considered suicide many times, and had days where I missed school because I lacked the motivation to move. I had become snippy; having an attitude towards my parents. But my pride had gotten in the way. I refused help. I never told my parents. Meanwhile, I was losing friends, gaining weight, was falling behind in school, and nearly drove into a tree to try and end it more times than I'd like to admit. I was weak. This car, it gave me hope. Maybe it was what I needed to help.

When I got behind the wheel of this Volvo, things felt right. It was so powerful. I loved the noise of the turbocharged inline 5. I loved how comfortable the two tone seats were. I loved how much space there was in the back for everything. I just… didn't have the money.

I began talking to grandma again, who agreed to loan me $2,000 so I could fully buy and register the car without affecting my bank account too badly. I needed this car. Even though dad said no, I went behind his back and purchased it, for $1700 cash. My friend drove me there to pick it up and follow me home. It was as I was driving it that I already began feeling some regrets.

Every once in a while, there was a rough shift. It creaked and rattled. The door ajar light didn't go off. It had a white bumper from a stock S70. It even had a rebuilt title. Had I gotten in over my head? As I pulled into the driveway, I walked in rather quietly. I had just gotten my dream to come true, but it didn't make me happy like I wanted.

I drove the car everywhere at first. My big purchase was new tires, at the cost of $400 I had brand new Dunlop around all those beautiful Pegasus rims. I was enjoying her more. I loved the sound and the passing power and the looks I got flying past everyone.

Dad meanwhile was trying to find every way out of this car. He began researching laws and rules and found out that since I was a minor, I could somehow return the car and he would have to agree since dad could sue him otherwise. But I kept telling him NO. This was MY car and I wasn't giving her up.

As sad as it sounds, one main reason I got the wagon was to impress this girl whom I liked at work. She had a bicycle and I would always give her rides home. Her bike barely fit in the Civic and she would end up having to hold the wheel just to make sure it didn't fly out of the open trunk. So, with the wagon, it'd fit perfectly!

It was the first time driving her home in it, the bike fit like a dream. Being young, I had to show off. I gave it a lot of throttle pulling onto the highway. The speed limit was 55. I floored it, putting her through her first acceleration test. Being 11 PM, the road was empty. Before I knew it I was going about 85 MPH. I backed off; now cruising at about 60. I took a turn a little fast, her bag flying across the backseat. I apologized to her, saying I'd clean up once we stopped. She turned to me, smiled, and said that it was alright and she was having too much fun to care. As I stopped in front of her house, I pulled the handbrake and she put her hand on top of mine. We shared a glance, she kissed my cheek, and got out. I lifted the bike out of the wagon and walked her to the door. As I walked away, I felt accomplished.

Now I needed some gas. The gas station was right down the road. As I pulled up to the pump, the car began idling extremely rough. The whole car was shaking. I thought maybe my gas gauge was a little off and I was out of fuel. I turned the car off and began trying to fuel. It wasn't taking any fuel. It kept acting as if the car was full and the pump stopped itself. After very slowly getting a gallon of gas inside, I started the car up again. It made some horrible noises as I watched the RPMs go extremely high then drop below idle. The car stalled. I was very confused. I pulled the key out and started again. It stalled once more. I put the car in neutral, gave it some throttle and then put in drive, trying to stop it from stalling. I just squealed my tires a bit before stalling, now in the middle of the gas station. I immediately call my dad, fighting back the tears. He says he will be right over. Some guy in a lifted Tacoma asks if I'm alright. I explain that it just killed itself and he agrees to help me push it out of the way. With his GF in the driver seat, we pushed it out of the way, and miraculously, it started. With the hood open, it sounded like it was leaking air. There were no fluids on the ground though and it was okay. I limped the car home; not breaking 20 MPH. Once I stopped in my driveway, it stalled out again.

Dad and I began playing mechanic in the driveway. We were not really sure what had gone wrong. It just kept acting very strange; with no control on the RPMs. When I gave it full throttle, I wasn't even hitting 3000 RPM. According to Google, I assumed the worst. My electronic throttle module was shot. This was about a $1500 repair at the dealer or $800 at the independent shop. Volvo knew this part was faulty. They actually put a 10 year warranty on it because of these issues. My car was now out of that window. I thought for sure I was toast. The next day, in the light, I noticed that my ETM was actually replaced at one point in its life. It would have been rare if it died twice, but I still thought that. I didn't touch the car for about 5 days. Finally, I got the courage to open it up again. Dad then found the problem, it was a loose air hose which connected to the ETM. Of all things, it was the little hose which gave air to the ETM. We tightened the clamp, and it was alive again.

I posted it on Craigslist again. I had enough of this car already. It was costing me too much money. And now, I was scared to drive it. I had messed up. When I had someone about 40 minutes North show interest, I agreed to show it. This led to the other story (link) where long story short, the car killed itself when I tried to sell it but miraculously came back to life when I was taking it back home. I now learned my car was possessed. It refused to leave my possession. This added to my fear of driving it. Once a week, I would take it to work, and it would be fine.

I had a night about a week ago when it was 60 degrees out. I had my break at work and it was hotter inside than outside. I went out to the wagon, folded the rear seats down, and just laid in the back of her. It was why I had gotten a wagon. I began to appreciate the car more and more.

Unfortunately for me, the girl who I drove home, had gotten a boyfriend. And I looked like an idiot when I tried to ask her out and learned the hard way she was in a relationship when she started telling me about the sex they were having. This put me into a deeper funk. Again, I was miserable. It didn't help that I was coming home to a now unemployed dad who would be fighting with my drunk mom. My whole life was falling apart. I had so much stress from still being in school and the hours of homework. I'd also have 25-30 hours of work a week. My bank account, which used to have around $700 in it, now had about $50. I was living pay check to pay check. It got to the point I couldn't even go out to the store and buy my $10 CD. My dad was cutting back on everything and hounding me for the insurance money I didn't really have at that exact moment.

The wagon is still for sale. I still can't get anyone to look at it. I have virtually no money left in my bank account. My parents are still fighting and miserable. I am still lonely and single. I just failed my math test and destroyed this 10 page essay I had to write for history. I am losing my friends and fighting with my parents. I missed school on Monday because I didn't want to move from my bed. I sleep too much. The only good thing is I lost about 50 pounds just because I was too stressed to eat.

I bought that Volvo to make me happy. It was my dream car. Sadly, it has been a disappointment. The car has made me worse. I look at it every morning with regret. When my parents make fun of it, I just want to break down and cry. I fucked up. I hate that car. It has just made me so much worse. I'm about to drop the price on Craigslist. At this point, I just want to break even or even take a little loss.

My tip to you fellow opponauts is to be careful. The car of your dreams, may not be as special as you thought. Also, buying on impulse is a horrible idea. We have a passion that unfortunately costs a whole lot of money. And although many of us don't buy a car every single day, when we break down and buy one, it'll consume your life and wallet. I'm at a point now where I don't really know what to do. This is my warning to all of you. Just be careful out there with what you do.

As for myself, I am still hanging in there. When I think I am getting better though, my life seems to fall apart again. I just... refuse to seek help. Mainly because I have too much pride to admit I need it. Also, we can't afford to see anyone professional. My dad would also laugh at me and not believe how stressed I am. I am in a bad spot here. My nose is just above the water line. Just every once in a while, when that wave comes by and I go under, seriously bad thoughts come into play. I just don't really know what to do anymore. I do know one thing, impulse buying... do NOT do it.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 10:21

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Don't know what to say about your life problems, but I don't think that the car is as fucked as you think. Being unable to get gas in means that the lines going to your evap canister or the evap canister is clogged, probably from the previous owner overfilling the tank. This can also put a vacuum on the gas tank making it hard for the fuel pump to pull gas out of it since there's no way for air to get in. I'd replace the canister and lines and see what happens. Whereabouts in Florida are you?

area man > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 10:24

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That sucks man. Sorry to year you're so down. Do you still have access to the Civic? If so, you should just put the Volvo out of your mind for a while as your bank account recovers until you can look at it as a fun project. Either that or put it on eBay as a winter beater from Florida (that's where you are right)

WesBarton89 - The Way to Santa Fe > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 10:25

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Man, rough period, I've been there. Here's my advice: if you are going to do something, do it for yourself, not to impress anybody else, especially not somebody you have a romantic interest in. Don't listen to people getting on your ass about what you buy. If you have the money, and want to buy a car, buy the shit out of that fucking car. If it's giving you problems, learn to fix them. As far as depression, that is a nasty beast. I've been there too many times, but I tell you this, as having been depressed myself, as well as being surrounded by severely depressed people all my life, you have to fight it. If you're going it alone, it's harder but it's possible. I've seen people fight it and win, and come out much better people, and I've seen people give up on it. Sometimes it's hard to fight, but there is joy in everything you see, even if it's not clear. What is life but a bar and grill of emotions, all you can eat, but the sad stuff (comfort foods) tastes the best, and the happiness tastes bitter, like beer, but once you acquire a taste, you'll never go back. I'm not telling you to become an alcoholic, but that was the first metaphor that popped in my head. I digress. Anyways, do what makes you happy, don't try to impress anyone else. Fight your depression. Get help if you can and if you need it. Do not give up. We Opponauts do not give up, it's not in our brown diesel blood. Good luck man.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 10:30

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FerrousJackal > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 11/11/2014 at 10:39

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I think the issue is less the vehicle itself and more what it represents. Having a physical manifestation of your problems doesn't do a whole hell of a lot for your mental state.

gawdzillla > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 10:43

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florida ? theres not even emission

see if you can dig up a how-to on removing all that evap crap and save some weight

BKRM3 > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 10:58

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True story: we bought my girlfriend a silver 1998 V70 because she needed something that would last a year or so. It was in horrible condition. I think the front end was held together with zip ties and coat hangers. It was the worst car. We loved it. We haven't quit talking about it and it's been gone since April of 2013. We miss it every day. Man was it a pile of crap. Appreciate yours while you have it. The amounts of money you're talking about aren't significant in the bigger picture. Your experience with this car, however, is. Someday you'll remember what it taught you and smile.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 11/11/2014 at 11:08

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And that is essentially my point. Ive learned. And hopefully someone out there will as well

Grindintosecond > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 11:16

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Life is always going to have rough patches. You're in one of them. Havinh lived through High School drama, College drama, single post-college drama, and the thirties, I can tell you something about your dad's outlook. It's not fair to you he thinks this way but to him, your problems aren't nearly of the magnitude of pressure he is feeling. I'm not siding with him. That's just how he is feeling now, and that's the difference of viewpoint.

Now, as a husband and parent, I can tell you this. With what I make, I know for a fact that if I loose my job at any moment, I will loose my house my wife and children are in. I will never forgive myself if I put them through that. I can only imagine the stress level your father feels not only loosing his job but combating the day to day of his wife. If my wife developed a problem, I wouldn't know how to handle that.

That's a look at at what he is feeling.

Now, thank you so much for sharing what a younger person feels on a day to day basis. It shows all of us that are in that life now or past it in another time what normal or abnormal is. We understand more now. Nothing is perfect and any small change to a young life is a huge issue even though to people with much more life experience, it may seem otherwise. I can tell you taking away a small stuffy from my 19 month old is like ripping her whole world away.

Your writing is very good by the way, keep working on it. It can take you places. Keep a journal on this period of you life. It's quite amazing how writing out what you're feeling and doing can help organize the crazy and you can find a direction on where to go and what to focus on next. Getting through challenges takes a plan and a follow through. It's tough to do it. Focus on the important parts. do those basic things and what you ned to happen will get closer. Grades. School. Get out to a better opportunity through that. Working at part-time jobs wont get you ahead, it just covers the bills along the way to the future. Just ensure you have a future with school work, otherwise college will cost quite a bit more. I used to have a '79 242 Volvo. It spent all of my money and never said thank you, which was good because I beat it to death over 100,000 miles.

Good luck in selling the car. Whatever you get out of it call it a loss and chalk it up as a learning experience. A big one. See what Sidewaysondirt said and if it's true, you might be one step ahead in getting this thing gone.

P.S. if that girl is having as much adventure as she says she is, she will be the first one to get a problem a doctor has to be seen about. That, or an accident will happen screwing up her whole academic future. (Ie: watch MTV's pregnant and 16, what a horrible situation of no future.) you didn't need her anyway. Good solid healthy fiends are better than drama.

Another thing. there is help. free help. I know that people don't like them, but any public school has counselors and they're not there for just academic problem kids. You might find a good one and just talking helps weather or not they care. At least they have resources to help if you start bombing tests and papers. Fight this thing, not yourself, not the car. Dont let the funk get you.

Grindintosecond > FerrousJackal 11/11/2014 at 11:20

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Oh that was deep. Accurate. fixing the car will do lots for an emotional turn around.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > BKRM3 11/11/2014 at 12:01

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Thats pretty much what this car is at this point. In the future, $2k wont be much. But now its hurting me.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > area man 11/11/2014 at 12:06

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Yeah the Civic is still mine and its my DD.

I just want the Volvo gone now

sellphones2493 > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 12:32

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Volvo Owner Here - Post it on Swedespeed .

You'll be able to gauge more interest, as it is an enthusiast website.

Sadly, I will tell you that even with the new tires, you're probably going to lose money. Honestly, I think you overpaid even at $1,700 for a V70R with a rebuilt title.

Have you ever considered parting it out?

ps. Your wheels aren't Pegasus'. These are Pegs:

Jayhawk Jake > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 12:41

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-"I pay for both my cars"

-"just a budget of around $5,000 and a need to be an automatic. This was because I would have to share this car with my grandma (she was loaning me about half of that money)"

-"grandma again, who agreed to loan me $2,000"

Something doesn't add up...and in hindsight I'm sure you realize that there's a big difference between having money and being able to afford something. The first step towards financial independence, however, is being honest with yourself about your finances.

On the personal front, just take a chill pill. Yeah, that's mediocre advice at best but you're 16: you have plenty of life ahead of you to get hung up worrying about some high school girl or some money problems when you have a supportive family (It doesn't sound like your parents/grandparents will kick you to the curb and let you starve). I know that probably doesn't sound like much, but trust me: when you're older you'll look back on some of the problems you're having now and laugh that you made a big deal of them.

Forget the car, forget the girls. Focus on school, maybe find a hobby that isn't as expensive as cars to keep yourself occupied.

ClarkRodriguez > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 13:22

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HOW DO YOU GET A JOB??????????? I'M ALMOST 17, AND I'VE APPLIED EVERYWHERE!!!! NOBODY WILL HIRE ME!!!!!

DancesWithRotors - Driving Insightfully > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 13:22

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It won't be a bad fix... If I were closer, I'd pitch in to help get her back in top shape, but I'm in Kansas, unfortunately...

Trust me, sometimes your dream cars bite you, but you have to bite them back and keep going. My Fiat is an example of that. My Amazon is, too.

Have a pic for inspiration...

And another:

(Fiat not pictured with the others, because it's still in a "some assembly required" state, in Tennessee.

And here's my Fiat, from the last time I drove it:

If that infernal Italian thing hasn't made me give up on it, you can pull through and get your semi-reliable Swedish wagon going again.

Dsscats > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 13:50

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Here's what you do: let it sit. Put it on the "in storage" option on your insurance (really cheap, 10 mile weekly cap) and keep it for sale.

Baked Goods > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 14:02

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I am not a therapist. I have been through some tough times like everyone else. Working and going to school is tough. Maintaining a healthy social life as an adolescent/teen is hard as well. I don't know if I buy the fact that the v70r is the root of your troubles. To be honest it may be worth keeping. Having a project to tinker with when you are stressed is a great way to cope. While I am nearly double your age I still have problems. Wrenching on my s2000 helps me get through them. While you may not be able to afford the parts you need at one time you can piece together the puzzle and work on other things which are free or have a minimal cost. My suggestion would be to devise a budget and see if it is feasible to keep it. Work on it when you are done with your homework. Make some friends who like to work on cars as well. I recently changed the suspension in my s2000 with the help of a friend and saved in the ballpark of $500 doing the work myself. I ended up spending maybe $200.00 on tools, pizza, and umm well lets just say soda. In the end it was gratifying experience that gave me confidence. Completing the work myself and spending time with my homey took my mind off dealing with the breakup I was going through with my girlfriend of 2.5 years. While this project cost money I still could have duplicated the feeling by polishing my wheels with $10 worth of sand paper. The moral of the story is not to give up. also if your friend devotes 6 hours to helping you work on your vehicle return the favor by devoting sometime to help him/her out as well.

graciousss > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 14:05

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Hey man just keep pushing on, and try to stay up. I have been there myself, and I know sometimes how you can feel down and like everything is falling apart. Girls come and go, there are billions of them out there, and some day you will find someone that is right for you. You are young, so don't get caught up on that. As for the car, I think it really isn't as bad as you think. In the big picture of your life, this purchase isn't going to be a big deal. I think the car will be fine, to be honest. It is your dream car after all, remember that. Things aren't always perfect, but I promise they are never as bad as they may seem. I know how tough family issues can be, especially involving alcohol and money. You have a good head on your shoulders. You are responsible and are stepping up to help out, and that's an awesome thing that most kids your age just don't do. Try to be positive and bring up some good vibes for your family, it will help alot more than you think. Look at all of the good things in life, and appreciate the little things. Realize that you really can do great things in your life, but you have to stay positive even when things aren't going your way. If you ever are having bad thoughts or are feeling down or need someone to talk to, post your email or something here and I will get in touch with you. I have been there before and talking to people is important. I know it's weird that I'm a random kid on the internet trying to help you, but when you are having bad thoughts I know it helps to know that people care and that other people have been through that too. Stay up, everything is going to be okay. Like I said, I've been there, and believe me, it gets alot better than this, just keep your chin up.

JGrabowMSt > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 14:38

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Oh hell no dude. You need to come back to Jersey for some cheering up.

SidewaysOnDirt is most likely 100% correct. Dodge LX platform RT models with the 18.5gal gas tank have a stalling issue when the gas tank vent gets clogged. An automatic with a stalling issue. Guess what my Magnum is? I'm just waiting to stall when leaving a gas station....

In fact, the Magnum was everything I wanted as well, but it's been sitting at a shop for a month now, because the worst case scenario, a lifter probably broke, and may have fucked up the cam too. The work required on the motor is going to hurt, but I will not give up the car.

Learn from your mistakes, but most importantly, do you still have pride in the wagon? I would. It's a challenge, not a roadblock. Having met you, I think I can honestly say that you're too young to throw in the towel over anything. You've got a learning experience at your fingertips. The weather might not be great, but you can roll the thing in and figure out one thing at a time. Is it a perfect car? No, nor should it be. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Many threads from a lot of other Oppos about their really cool cars is also a rant about what broke, or what isn't working right, or something that is expensive that it will need soon. That SL600 you saw, I bought it. And the turn signal came off on the highway. And it's overdue for an oil change, spark plug change, fuel filter, and the soft top is fraying. The Thermostat is broken, and it has a leak somewhere, which I'm pretty confident is actually the oil pan gasket (which is convenient since I need to change the oil anyway).

In short, you've got a really cool car. Don't give up because it's a pain in the ass. Cool cars are just that. So many guys I know own some insanely cool cars, and you know what, our best conversations come from talking about how shitty some aspects are. Maybe it's due to negligence of the previous owner, maybe it's because they just have shitty designs. In the end, no one tore the Countach off their bedroom wall because they wouldn't be able to afford them, and no one ignored the Veyron after learning it got worse gallons per mile than an 18 wheeler.

The girl is always an added bonus, but the hard part to keep in mind is that there will be another girl, and she'll probably get away, and then it'll likely happen again, at least another couple times before you find the right one. Just like the car, she'll knock you down, and then bring you back up. It's the rhythm of life, there's no getting around it. We've all been there, and from experience, in both departments (the girl and the car), you just have to make the best of it. Look around and see if there's a Volvo club, or a Volvo website with people that may be able to help you directly. If you were in Jersey, I'd be under that Volvo, whether I had to drag you out of the house kicking and screaming, or you walked out willingly. Love your car for everything about it, the good and the bad. It's no different than any woman you'll ever date, except the car doesn't share your bed. That's a good thing.

You have a DD to fall back on, so just use it to your advantage. It'll be tough, but in the end, getting your dream car running again is always worth it. Always. Never forget that you were able to fix it yourself . No better feeling than that.

9brghtn4 > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 15:43

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Hi mate, I hope you read this. I'm 20 years old and got my driving license exactly 2 months ago today. For a few days I got to drive my dad's car, but I'm studying far from home (shitty associate degree) and when I had to go, it was as if I had accomplished nothing by getting my license since I don't have a car.

Like you, I'm depressed most of the days. I feel alone, dead inside and unable to grow up / become and adult. Never had a girlfriend or really close friends. My parents have been divorced for about 4 years now, all because my mom wouldn't give up on alcohol for years and she neglected me in the process. My dad just works and that's pretty much all he does (can't blame him? he didn't have a father). So yeah, I've never felt like I have actual parents who care about me. I think I have BPD but no money for a shrink. Sleeping schedules non-existant. Last week I attended class 2 days. I skip meals. Suicidal thoughts: check.

I feel like I need a woman in my life, but I'm too shy to talk to them. And sometimes I just want to drive and drive, it's one of the few things that make me feel accomplished and adult. But no money and no confidence mean I won't have any of those anytime soon. I'm pretty much obsessed with used cars too, I browse the ads everyday, knowing I can't afford a car even if I got it for free (I especially like BMWs). My life consists of being stuck in a shithole of loneliness while an amazing life passes by in front of my face, but doesn't touch me.

I don't know how to end this comment but shit man, if you read it please reply. Just wanted to share too, since we seem to have a few things in common.

9brghtn4 > sellphones2493 11/11/2014 at 15:57

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I like how the "R" and the air hole are exactly opposite. Weight distribution, yo.

sellphones2493 > 9brghtn4 11/11/2014 at 16:05

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Never noticed that...Haha

It's a great looking wheel to this day - too bad they weigh so much. I shaved off some poundage by getting mine machined.

Vicente Esteve > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/11/2014 at 19:51

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Hey Justin, I experienced something similar to you and bought on impulse. A car with a rebuilt title, no service history, and with the confidence of a teenager. As you said, it was a money basket that my father had to pay, so it makes even more of an impact of all the work you did because you paid it yourself. I had the EXACT teary eyed feelings when I had to call my father to pick me up, and understand. It was our dream that wrecked us, but a the same time they taught us a lesson.

I hope that everything gets worked out because the worse always is balanced by the good that will arrive in the future. Keep high hopes because you not only have me, but a whole community behind. You are needed here and where you live.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > Grindintosecond 11/11/2014 at 22:12

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I know my dad is stressed. But this was sudden or unexpected. He knew this was going to happen 3.5 months ago! He had all the notice in the world. The irony (if you want to call it that) is that he's a bartender (he is currently unemployed since they are renovating). He refuses to take some of these jobs because he feels they are below him. So we are stuck listening to him 24/7.

And thank you for the compliment. It does mean a whole lot to me.

The girl? That's a whole mess in itself because SHE WOULD'VE BEEN MINE IF I ASKED HER OUT SOONER. I was too shy and didn't, and now she is with some rich asshole who buys her love. We shared many moments and experiences and I liked her so much and she even admitted to me that she liked me too. I fucked up, which makes me so upset because we were almost perfect. Now she hates my guts (I have no clue what I did) and feel like the world is against me.

And Im scared to tell guidance because I don't want special treatment. I don't want to be called out of classes or given special circumstances. I hate feeling different. I feel that way as it is I dont need it reinstated in school. That's my problem here. And it sucks.

I'm just miserable now. I hate it so so much.

9brghtn4 > 9brghtn4 11/12/2014 at 04:22

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I hope this isn't public now, I clicked "dismiss" on your comment because I read that if I do that, my next reply becomes private. Anyway my Facebook is /edhbrighton

Hiroku > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/12/2014 at 15:31

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I don't think the R is as far gone as you think. As most have already stated these cars are extremely sensitive to low voltages so something as simple as a bad ground, bad battery, bad wiring or bad alternator will cause pretty much everything to stop working altogether (it does have electric EVERYTHING as you described in your ad). Remember how you thought your ETM was toast and it was just a loose hose? This could very well be a similar kind of issue. I'd get a reputable Volvo indy to have a look at it, check the forums as I'm sure you'd have no trouble at all finding someone knowledgeable about these cars willing to take a look at it for you. You'd be surprised what a great community there is around turbo Volvo wagons.

I'm really sorry about your life situation overall, and surely only you know what you have been through, but as far as the V70R purchase goes I don't think you are that fooked. Look at it this way: if I undertand it correctly, you got the car for 1700 bucks and are now looking to sell it for around 2500. Considering the other investments you made in it (such as the tyres, etc.), you are looking to break even or even make a little extra in it. It's not like you spent all your college savings on an expensive new car and it exploded the next day, leaving you with nothing. You may be going through a rough patch right now financially but you do have an asset sitting in your driveway that is worth a fair bit of money, so you'll be able to get out of it as soon as you cash in on it.

My view in life is that I'd much rather regret having done something than having done nothing at all and forever wondering what might have been. If you get out of this situation just as you started (in financial terms) but with the huge baggage you got out of it all, PLUS the fact that you got to enjoy your dream car (even if for a limited time), then it makes the overall balance quite positive in my opinion.

Tina Corbett > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/12/2014 at 16:38

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"It should also be noted that around this time, I began suffering with my rather severe depression. I had hit a rough patch in my life. Nothing was going my way. I began getting lonely and felt worthless and useless."

Worthless? Kid, listen to me...you most certainly are NOT worthless or even useless!!

At your age, most kids are too busy playing video games, or doing stupid shit to even begin to have the means to have 2 cars and help the parents out. You've already done more than most people out there. And if the car didn't work out? So what? Look at it as a learning experience. We all buy shitty cars. seriously, you should have seen some of the crap cans I've owned.

For the depression, look, I get it. Really. I've battled depression for almost 10 years now, and my moms death 2 years ago and the financial shitstorm it brought into my life almost put me over the edge. I too did the whole "If I just drove this car into off the cliff, at least my kids would get the insurance money.." thing. It's tough. Tougher than anyone is really willing to admit. But at least you are aware enough to understand what's going on. Just admitting it yourself, much less others takes a lot of balls. And don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. But if you don't want to get professional help, there are places out there you can just talk to someone, even if it's in a chat or over the phone. Look them up. Please. Not for anyone else other than yourself. Hell...message me and I'll talk to you.

For the car..yunno what? Keep it. Tinker with it, Rage at it. Hoon the ever luvving Hell out of on the days it's running. Or just sit in it and listen to music, whatever. If you really want to, Demolition Derby that bitch and write it off on your taxes or something! Or LeMons might be right up your alley. :-)

It's YOURS. You earned it, and don't let it go just because you're having a tough time.

These shitty times WILL pass, and don't be looking back thinking "If only..."

Will > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! 11/16/2014 at 01:48

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Just keep your head up man, and remember a car is just a car, nothing more than a hobby on wheels. Keep your head above the water, life is worth it and this too will pass. Matthew 6:25-34

deedeesdaddy > Vicente Esteve 12/13/2015 at 13:40

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em... guys.... don’t even trip.. teenagers always have the worst ....

When I was 15 I bought a 1984 cutlass with no clue and no money ... bad combination. Sold it, first mistake. Now 34 same love for all things with an engine. What I’ve learned is cars cost money. Either in repairs or car notes .. the problems u mentioned are all totally normal. My advice to you is don’t give up on your baby OR the hoes. When u do conquer them and you will, that makes it all worth it. And the bond between u and the car will be unbreakable for life and will pass down the car to your child one day. This is the type of thing that money can’t buy ! Hang in there dude. It gets better.. knowledge being the key