Hello Oppo, It's Your Newly-Remote Co-Worker

"For Sweden" (rallybeetle) 05/20/2020 at 14:24 • Filed to: True Stories, Whimsy, God Help Us All

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How do I join the Zoom meeting? And how do I open this PDF?

benn454 > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:40

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 Delete system32.

ClassicDatsunDebate > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:42

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Here, let me share my screen with you.

Hold-on.

Can you see it?

No? ok hold on.....

OK how about now?

No? ok I think I got it now.

EXITS MEETING

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:42

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ClassicDatsunDebate > benn454 05/20/2020 at 14:44

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or control-alt Delete for the less nuclear option.

Chariotoflove > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:45

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I don’t know why I have to be at this meeting anyway the guy who called it always wastes everyone’s time he’s such a tool and...huh?...whaddaya mean I’m not muted?

ranwhenparked > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:51

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I don't have time, I have to read each of the 18 emails the boss just sent, either containing data I can easily see myself, or reminding me of some obvious basic requirement of my job. 

This is what we'll show whenever you publish anything on Kinja: > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:51

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For Sweden > ranwhenparked 05/20/2020 at 14:53

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“ Please review this attached document.”

-Email with no attachments

TheRealBicycleBuck > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:53

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First rule: Don’t be like Jennifer.

user314 > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 05/20/2020 at 14:54

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That’s the first question our help desk people ask, usually followed by the sound of keys clacking as they furiously Google the problem.

ranwhenparked > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:59

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The previous email was sent in error, please see the corrected document attached

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 14:59

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Boss: how do I do this on a mac?

me: uh..IDK, it is in the google drive, so if you access that you;ll see it. So you’ll first have to sign in on chrome?

Boss: do I have a google account?”

Me: well you used to access the files, so you must.

20 minutes later

Boss: So its not opening, why isn’t it opening? 

me: IDK, everyone has a PC and brought their computers home

Goggles Pizzano > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 15:02

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Does this mean we’ll be seeing more of you on Oppo ? Cuz, I don’t know...

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > ClassicDatsunDebate 05/20/2020 at 15:03

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( dog barking)

can whoever that is please mute your phone

For Sweden > Goggles Pizzano 05/20/2020 at 15:03

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oh no

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 15:16

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- My boss, pre-COVID and not while working remotely

user314 > ranwhenparked 05/20/2020 at 15:23

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*Attached is a copy of a copy of a document superseded and archived five years ago*  

user314 > benn454 05/20/2020 at 15:27

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Open Windows Explorer and navigate to This PC. Here, we can see all our drives listed.

Right click a hard drive and choose “Format…” A small window will appear on screen, where you can set volume label, select file system, allocation unit size as well as quick format or not (just as the options we had in Disk Manager).

Next, confirm that you want to format the hard drive.

ClassicDatsunDebate > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas 05/20/2020 at 15:36

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30 seconds later....

Kevin, we cant hear you dude....you’re on mute

ClassicDatsunDebate > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas 05/20/2020 at 15:38

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same except me and my wife

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > ClassicDatsunDebate 05/20/2020 at 15:42

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Jim, yes the weather is finally nice, but please call from inside your house. we can hear the sprinkler. 

Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas 05/20/2020 at 15:58

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First problem: Mac

Second problem: Mac

benn454 > user314 05/20/2020 at 16:12

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 And I thought I was evil.

user314 > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas 05/20/2020 at 16:36

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Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 16:52

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Today I had a zoom meeting with 322 people.

It was... surprisingly not bad.

For Sweden > Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo 05/20/2020 at 17:03

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That’s just a Twitch stream

Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 17:22

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Pretty much haha.  I think 5 people presented but yeah...

Tripper > Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo 05/20/2020 at 17:58

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+1 we’re about 100 employees and we’ve been doing weekly meetings since the beginning of this without issue. I’m in charge of IT and  took us all cloud last fall only because we had a great year and the powers that be were really throwing the money around. Super lucky, I cannot imagine supporting our old database via VPN through all of this.

Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > Tripper 05/20/2020 at 18:13

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Wow yeah that was good timing haha.  We had to emergency buy 30k VPN licences company-wide.  Had something like 1 licence per 10 employees and then suddenly had to go 100% remote. O_o;;

wafflesnfalafel > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 19:23

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C an we blame you for leaving dirty dishes in the sink and stealing my banana?

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > For Sweden 05/20/2020 at 19:44

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For Sweden > wafflesnfalafel 05/20/2020 at 20:05

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Yes

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available 05/20/2020 at 22:27

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Boss: E veryone move your office home so we don’t loose any productivity

also boss: send me a screenshot of the spreadsheet, because i can’t open it on my ipad

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Tripper 05/20/2020 at 23:17

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For the past few years the IT guy has been pushing the need for upgrades as evrything is one bandaid on top of another . First week everyone is home the file slowdowns begin, . B oss”order the stuff , at any point 1 0+ people are stuck” IT “ yeah the price ha s now tripled because everyone is trying to upgrade. 

Tripper > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas 05/21/2020 at 08:05

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Haha yup! I emailed my favorite vendor for something simple when this all started. The guy was like “hey can this wait until the end of the day.” Then I get a text off the record, “hey man, your company let you freelance? I’m dying over here, could really use your help”. Companies that are a couple hundred to a couple thousand deep all called saying “we want to go all virtual, like tomorrow”