JBL: Crap Audio for Brand Whores

"If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee)
05/02/2020 at 18:26 • Filed to: Rant, Hot take

Alternate title: More Speakers Doesn’t Mean Better

Seriously, the JBL system in my Mom’s Sienna is possibly the worst sound system I’ve ever heard. The “90's cheap car” system in my Neon was better. All low noises are converted directly into buzzes and thumps wash. This washes out most of the backing tracks, leaving you with the vocals and maybe two instruments audible over the constant bass thrum.

On top of that, the big speaker in the center of the dash plays both audio channels (so, mono) and does it louder than the rest. The end result is that you’re just sitting next to a music source rather than being cocooned in sound from all directions like you should be.

But hey, at least it has DSP! Let’s see what kind of cool toys it ha-

Oh. The only options it gives you are a fake surround sound (that makes it somehow even more buzzier and echoier) and a speed-controlled volume that doesn’t even have any sensitivity settings. Nothing fancy going on with the equalizer either. Just your typical bass/mid/treble sliders.

DISCUSSION (16)

PyroHoltz f@h Oppo 261120 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 18:32

It is everything stock, no amp, speakers or other mods?

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > PyroHoltz f@h Oppo 261120
05/02/2020 at 18:34

All stock. It’s the most pemium sound system available for that gen Sienna . Ten speakers of pure disappointment.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 18:39

Here’s a dirty secret: The speakers probably weren’t made by JBL

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
05/02/2020 at 18:42

Honestly the speakers aren’t that bad (except the center one). I think it’s more that the la rge interior space of the car wasn’t taken into consideration when tuning the sound system.

SBA Thanks You For All The Fish > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 18:46

It all went to shyte with the Harman deal, who was gathering up brands like crackheads save old needles.

Back “in the day” James B. Lansing set an amazingly high bar and things like the JBL-100 and Century series were the staple in LA’s recording studios for decades. HOWEVER, that’s a long time ago and JBL as a brand has just been completely whored out. Sadly, the same thing happened to Klip sch.

I still trust B&W but that’s about the last of the old guard names that still mean anything. Marantz? nah. Polk Audio? nah JBL? hell no.

ranwhenparked > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 18:46

But, on the other hand, the JBL system I had in my mid ‘80s Lincoln sounded so good, my audio snob boss at the time asked if I had upgraded it to something modern, and that was with maybe 6 speakers and an amp. He didn’t have much else nice to say about it

thatsmr > SBA Thanks You For All The Fish
05/02/2020 at 19:21

Interesting and believable Harmon take. I dont have Mark Levinson in my old Lexus but I either listen to talk or the Garage channel, neither of which demand fidelity. At home my old school Klipsch Forte IIs kill the need for "surround", they probably surround my neighbors too!

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 19:55

Replacing the speakers would help

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire
05/02/2020 at 19:56

Of course it would, but I’m still pissed off that a "premium ” sound option would sound so shitty

Snuze: Needs another Swede > SBA Thanks You For All The Fish
05/02/2020 at 19:57

I have some Klipsch stuff circa 2010-2011 and I love it. I even wrote a poem about it:

“Roses are red, violets are blue, when I listen to death metal, the neighborhood does too.”

Snuze: Needs another Swede > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 20:00

For what its worth, the “Premium” system in our Terrain Denali (made by Bose, because of course it is) sounds like absolute garbage. I’ve heard wet farts with more fidelity than this piece of shit.

My neighbor, who’s a car and audio dude, said the old say was “No highs? No lows? Must be Bose!”

We have some bitching JBL setups at work, but its high end studio stuff. Im sorry the car system sucks.

19JRC99 > SBA Thanks You For All The Fish
05/02/2020 at 20:00

I quite like the Polk’s I put in the doors of my Ranger.

PyroHoltz f@h Oppo 261120 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 20:05

Sounds awesome (pun definitely intended)

coqui70 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/02/2020 at 23:03

I found the the stock 6-speaker sound system on that gen Sienna sounds better if you :

Pump the Bass to +3

Treble to +1

Fade to Rear +1

ASL High (sound level adjustment for road noise)

Also helps to have a good music source (phone with Pandora on high quality audio, equalizer adjusted).

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > coqui70
05/02/2020 at 23:36

So why does the base model ASL have actual s ettings instead of just on or off???

coqui70 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
05/03/2020 at 13:25

Because it’s better.