The Emperor Knows Best

"El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First!" (lightningzone) 04/13/2020 at 13:52 • Filed to: None

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Snuze: Needs another Swede > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 04/13/2020 at 14:03

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BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!!

Oh... wait... wrong cosmic diety.  So, yeah, umm, praise the emperor...?

For Sweden > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 04/13/2020 at 14:06

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Didn't they worship the emperor?

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > For Sweden 04/13/2020 at 14:19

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Yeah. But they wouldn’t be doing it if he had a word in it. He was basically like “ fuck your ethics, beliefs and dogmas, I will play god and create a bunch of hulk ing superhumans by implanting a bunch of extra organs , various parts and substances into them and then I will lead them through the vastness of space by passing through a world filled with ugly motherfuckers, your preists told you to stay away from. That way I will make humanity at the dominant force in the the Galaxy, and you will follow me because I’m the fucking E mperor of Mankind”.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Snuze: Needs another Swede 04/13/2020 at 14:22

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May the Emperor enlight your darkened path. 

Snuze: Needs another Swede > For Sweden 04/13/2020 at 14:34

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In the truly ironical sense, yes.

He banned religion because it feeds the warp , which is a bad place full of demons . The lynch pin in the story is that the emperor knows its bad but never really tells anyone else how bad it is (or that it even exists). Some of his sons (the Primarchs) ignore him and worship him as a god, one even discovers the warp on his own and dabbles in warpcraft. The emperor goes into daddy rage and punishes them (but still never tells them!) . Some of t he kiddos throw a tantrum because they don’t like daddy going “just d o as I say because ” and start a galaxy wide civil war, which culminates in him having to kill his favorite son, but not before being mortally wounded by said son.

The surviving loyal sons turn him into a martyr and place him into a life support device that feeds on warp energy generated by people praising him. So his ascendance into godhood and subsequent worship both sustains him but also powers the bad shit in the warp that he was trying to fight/save humanity from.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 04/13/2020 at 15:48

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Kill the Mutant, burn the heretic , purge the unclean....

InFierority Complex > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 04/13/2020 at 16:35

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I praise the Omnissiah

One of the best title drops for a game.

Derpwagon > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 04/14/2020 at 21:54

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Let none survive.