What's a brother gotta do

"Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom" (will-alib) 03/25/2020 at 14:40 • Filed to: None

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To get outta the greys? I was banished to the Land of Misfit Jalops two weeks ago, and my request to the Vatican for an audience with the Pope keeps getting denied.

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 14:48

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Upgrade to Jalopnik Gold to continue front page shitposting

MonkeePuzzle > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 14:50

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send me $$$, I will fix this

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 14:51

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my request to the Vatican for an audience with the Pope keeps getting denied

Well here’s your problem...you gotta put in a request to a Catholic bear then you get an audience with the Pope in the woods

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles 03/25/2020 at 15:01

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What is this Jalopnik Gold you speak of? Is it the secret society where members shed their skin at night and breath dryer lint?

Nom De Plume > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 15:02

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Note: T railing edge of your screen name bearing similarity to me might not be helping.  

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 15:05

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No, all Jalopnik Go ld memberships go into Mike Spinelli’s retirement fund. It was a deal reached at the midnight hour before Spinelli’s departure to keep.....”the pictures”..... out of the hands of the general populace.

fintail > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 15:48

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Did you call out one of the wikipedia-schooled “experts” on FP ? They don’t like that, being the font of angsty knowledge that they are.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 15:56

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One approach would be to suck up to all the staff for the next couple of weeks or months and then say sorry for being a previously bad Turbineguy... and that you have learned your lesson and now you have turned over a new Turbine.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly 03/25/2020 at 16:00

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Ooof. You mean, like, show remorse?

I think it’d be easier to just start a new commenting account, so lovable old me can continue to be my curmudgeonly self. 

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 16:46

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But don’t you want to demonstrate to the world that you had a “come to Jesus” moment????

Urambo Tauro > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/25/2020 at 18:21

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Report it to the Kinja team as a bug. If you were shadowbanished to the greys without anyone officially notifying you of such punishment, they can’t prove that it’s not a glitch (or an accidental mis-click from whomever banned you).

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly 03/25/2020 at 22:37

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Naah. I’ve never been that self-aware. 

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 03/26/2020 at 10:08

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You’re going to hell!!! A grey hell!!!

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly 03/26/2020 at 10:34

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Going? I’m already there.

But it’s not that bad. They have snacks.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly 03/26/2020 at 10:56

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Late edit:  I’m back. And I seek vengeance. 

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > Urambo Tauro 03/26/2020 at 10:57

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Done and done. I’m back. I owe you your favorite bottle of whatever.

And a donut.