CONGRATS!!! You've been promoted to run Nissan and save the company from its impending doom. What is the plan??

"Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras" (jegoingout) 07/29/2019 at 09:30 • Filed to: None

1

31

Your situation : !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , everything is on fire, your cars suck, fleet sales obviously don’t work, you have no more cash to throw onto cars, and your fire extinguisher is empty.

Your model line up for the US market:

Versa Sedan: a local Oppo’s favorite rental vehicle ever

Versa Note: an irrelevant vehicle

Sentra: Every college freshman’s car if their parents don’t already get them a Honda Civic, Toyota Corolla, or Ford Mustang

Altima: The “I didn’t look at anything else prior to going to my local Nissan store” car

Maxima: SpOrTy

Nissan Leaf: ELECTRIC IS THE FUTURE

370Z: Can almost vote in the States

GTR: I suddenly became !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

Kicks: MILLENIALS!!!!

Rouge: Is approaching it’s 6th birthday

Murano: MEH

Pathfinder:MEH

Armada: When you want to play real life Battleship in an over 60k SUV

Frontier: Is nearly as old as the 370Z

Titan: No one wants these fucking things

Your finances are more depressing than country music: !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

Your previous CEO:  

You can’t possibly do worse than him, so no pressure.

Your plan: (insert your plan here)

Ssfancyfresh > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:35

3

Rogue-ify everything. People love  Rogues.

Leaf-ify the Rogue. Planets love Leafs

pip bip - choose Corrour > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:35

4

downsize the company to make the Leaf and GTR only with Nismo variants

OPPOsaurus WRX > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:36

9

i’d put this thing into full production so we can go out with a party.

facw > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:38

2

Hmm, I don’t have a full plan but here are some steps:

Lift the Versa Note, give it some cladding.

Kill the Sentra, if you’re poor you should drive a Versa

Kill the Maxima

Keep building the Z until the tooling wears out

GTR is now a three row CUV (it can have a big engine I guess...)

New uni-body small truck

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:42

1

Buy the name rights to Hupmobile, rename all Nissan US factories to Hupmobile, put 1930s throwback faces on everything (mostly already lumpy enough this is easy), immediately offer tweed interiors.

This will of course not work, but it’ll be really funny.

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:44

0

I would like to preface my comment with Nissan sales numbers- See what they sell the most and don’t fix what is not broken- Kicks, Rogue, Murano- but add electric and hybrid options for these

https://usa.nissannews.com/en-US/releases/release-9f2d76970e5001a15b50706613002e7a-nissan-group-reports-june-2019-us-sales

As much as I hate the CVTs, I’d not discontinue it. I drove the Maxima with it and it’s actually decent because it has a good engine behind it. Speaking of Maxima, keep the CVT, but add AWD and a Hybrid Option. Nissan has no Hybrid cars so the Maxima might be the one

ALtima, Sentra, Vers a all do fine for lower income/subprime/rental customers. Just keep enhancing them with safety and tech. Honestly the target customer for this doesn’t give AF if it has a CVT or Turbo or AWD or any other driver oriented features

Frontier needs an update -badly.They still sell 41K of them every year. But if they do bring it into the 21st century that would be a nice option to cross shop

370Z - needs 400Hp 3.0T from Infiniti, keep the manual. Improve the interior. Make it a Nissan Supra competitor.

No opinions for Armada, Titan, Gt-R, Leaf

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:44

3

way2blu does a rev update > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:45

4

Nissan needs to do what Dodge has been doing: cash in on the brand cred that it does have.

Dodge peaked in the 1960s/70s. Nissan on the other hand, peaked in the ‘90s, baby!

Re-position as a “back-to-basics” Nissan. Heck, most of the cars are super old anyway.

Essentially, focus on performance & value, and release a bunch of retro-styled cars on existing platforms. Offer stick shift where appropriate.

Ditch “Nissan Intelligent Mobility” and all other tech nonsense. Sell off assets to fund focus on design and performance.

Old platforms can still sell just fine if they’re fast & comfortable. Drop the VR30DETT in the 370z, give it round headlights and rectangular taillights, and call it the 300ZX.

Look at Radwood, look at Bring A Trailer, look at any import-themed car meet. Look at all that, and all the 240s (both Z and SX), look at all the GT-Rs, heck, look at the heckin’ Nissan PAOS and tell me Nissan doesn’t have what it takes to make a comeback. But they need to re-brand, hard, if that’s gonna happen.

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:46

1

1) Cut the sentra and maxima ASAP

2) Hybrid/PEV the rogue and give it a futuristic skin.

3) Kill 370z. Make a new RWD platform for sharing with infiniti BUT! Make sure the 2-door coupe can have 4 seats. Just say “fuck it” for the Z variant and leave them out. Make a base model with a turbo-4 of some kind and bring back the silvia/240sx. Maybe it has a hybrid or something. Then make a Z variant with......a bigger turbo 4. Parts-bin the fuck out of this. Get your name in the press for good reasons for once

4) RIde the GTR until it dies. Then kill the name again

5) Stay out of motorsport for a decade or so. Between the electric deltawing failure and the Nismo-LMP disaster, you need to let that stink leave the room before trying again.

6) Kill the titan. It’s just sad at this point.....

7) Frontier is a money maker all over the world. Poach some ex-USA brand engineers and make a small to mid-sized truck and utilitarian lineup. 

Wacko > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:47

1

Kill the Sentra, and versa.

Make a mini cuv based on the Micra, bring the new Juke to America, refresh the Rogue, make a wagon of the Altima with awd and plastic body cladding. Make the pathfinder find real paths again.

Make a new modern Z car

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:48

1

My plan: kill Nissan off . Am I doing this right?

bob and john > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:48

4

plan:

bring the micra back to USA.

Drop the two versa’s

take the sentra, make it as close to the B18 Se-R as possible. try to bring down that henous wheel/body panel ratio by making the CAR smaller, not adding 20s

actually build that cool IDx thing that they show cased two or thee years ago. 

Altima: make this the current maxima (bear with me)

Maxima: lift, add plastic cladding, make a sporty wagon/cross over thing.

370Z: drop the price to toybaru levels, make a LSD standard, update interior, add a TT version for another 10K (that motor is already in the Q50)

GTR: time for the R36 gen.

trucks:

frontier: add a diesel motor option

titan: leave as is. maybe less ugly

rogue: give it a decent AWD system. and make it smaller. think CX-3 size.

murano: leave. it sells well.

pathfinder: garbage. trash it.

armada: make moar square. Add diesel option and tout towing capacity.

bring back something akin to the X-terra or even better, the 4th gen patrol.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:49

1

Get rid of the CVT and strike a deal with ZF. Make a hatch version of all of the cars, but lift them and give them cladding. 

Azrek > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:51

1

- Small Pickup truck. Perfect for teens, construction people and terrorists.

- Make the GTR less expensive. The car is amazing, but for $125k you have some very stiff competition.

- Update the 350 and 370Z back to fun performance cars that are budget. Ford Focus RS and WRX should be your competition range and just under Mustang GTs. 

- Sentra needs to die. That car is always filling up used car lots

- Versa make it more fun. Add some color or design to such a budget car. This is up against Prius in terms of size. Compete with fun.

- Altima/Maxima one needs to have a serious hybrid version that appeals to soccer moms and millennials .

Future next gen S2000 owner > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 09:56

4

Go big on small sports cars. Watch the company tank in 1-2 years, get fired just before things aren’t salvageable , and float my rich ass onto a private island with my golden parachute.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 10:00

2

Merge with Renault.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/29/2019 at 10:01

2

The true American dream.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 07/29/2019 at 10:01

2

Threaten to file, then beg for monies.

f86sabre > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 10:07

1

Decrease the model line. Keep Versa, Leaf, Altima, Rogue, Titan and Armada. Develop a midsized world truck to rival the Hilux.  Upsize Rogue to something between it and the Murano. I assume Armada is making money, most big SUVs do, keep it unless it’s not. Develop an electric Altima. Quality and design are a requirement and not an option.

promoted by the color red > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 10:08

1

Switch Sentra & Maxima to Common Module Family before Renault can get out out of there. Make plans to kill them in the future for Leaf derivatives.

Keep Versa. Kill Rogue Sport in the US. 

Dump CVT, develop conventional AT gearbox.

Bring the Navara over as a “Frontier” or at least reuse the platform. The factory in MX is already churning them out. 

JustAnotherG6 > bob and john 07/29/2019 at 10:32

0

I can get behind this plan.

Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 11:05

1

Nissan: :d oesn’t update a vehicle design for 15 years: “We have no idea why this model isn’t selling! ”

Everyone: “...”

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > OPPOsaurus WRX 07/29/2019 at 11:08

0

Might as well go out with a bang and zero fucks

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > bob and john 07/29/2019 at 11:09

0

Give me the idx or give me death

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/29/2019 at 11:09

0

Carlos, is that you?

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > pip bip - choose Corrour 07/29/2019 at 11:10

0

Yes.

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 07/29/2019 at 11:12

0

Yes

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 07/29/2019 at 11:12

2

*gasps in French*

CaptDale - is secretly British > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 14:34

1

Shut it down. Stop all updates in the works. Split the company in “2" Have Nissan be the beige mobiles and rebadge anything fun as Datsun (Z car, Skyline, and S600). Then make the cheap cars actually cheap. Ditch all CVTs that have fact shift points for CVTs that function like CVTs are supposed to. Make sports cars only with manuals and autos are a $3k option. 

Derpwagon > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 14:52

1

Step 1: partner with someone that makes a different cvt transmission for the commuter spec cars . Nissan’s CVTs have a terrible reputation.

Step 2: stick that new cvt in every single base spec car and SUV I sell.

Step 3: find another partner for a good DCT transmission. We’re putting that in the sport trim on the Maxima. Let’s get a little driver engagement back. Fire the designer, fresh parchment redraw. Let us make it not hideous. Speaking of, we’re bringing back the Maxima wagon. Fuck you because I said so. It’s getting AWD.

Step 4: Axe t he Altima. It is too big. Buy a new Maxima instead. It’s cool now. Wagon, AWD, DCT.

Step 5: Reposition the Sentra to take on the Civic. Give it a 6 speed manual. Available on ALL trims. Bring back the SE-R with a 1.5 to 2.0 liter with around 200hp. L ooking at you, Civic SI.

Step 6: pack the Versa full of tech. Co mbine it ad the note, it’s one car with teo body styles. Features/options are identical btween the two. Make it a solid first car that isn’t soulless and shit. New non-shit CVT standard, manual a no-cost upgrade. 6 speed with the 6th geared for fuel economy, but 1-5 short enough that it’s somewhat engaging.

Now that the commuter cars are out of the way, we’re gonna do the exact same treatment to the corresponding crossovers to each segment.

Kicks: versa

Rogue: Sentra

Murano: Maxima

Pathfinder: total redesign. Target the 4Runner. Body on frame, capability focused. Give it a 4 cyl turbodiesel as an engine option. We already work with Cummins.

Armada: Pathfinder, but MOAR. target the GL470whatever. Give it a 6cyl turbodiesel option. Load it with Infiniti bits to fancy it up.

Federalize the Patrol. I see you, Jeep.

Step I stopped counting: double the range on the L eaf. Keep it the same price.

Pickup Trucks : clean sheet redesign for the both of them. Offer legitimate quality high end interiors on the Titan in higher trims. Let’s steal some market share. Offer a version with coil spring rear a la Dodge to make it ride damn nice for the majority owners who will just use it as a car anyway. Frontier gets a 4cyl diesel and serious off-road chops in the right trim. Let’s offer our own ranger raptor and take on the Colorado. Commuter spec frontiers need to ride like a damn Ridgeline, while maintaining body-on -frame design.

Sorts cars: dear public, and dear America. I am sorry about the Z languishing on the vine. New generation will come out next year. It will offer new Supra performance to start, be GT86 sized, and cost at top trim what the current 370z base price is. It might be a little bare bones at that price but actual buyers won’t care. Maybe Lotus has an old interior designer who’s looking for work.

GT-R: R36 coming soon. Twin turbo hybrid powerplant. Expect heinous performance.

Oh, and I'm building the goddamn IDX.

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 07/29/2019 at 19:33

1

Shutter the US market until the merger with Renault and Mitsubishi is complete. Then relaunch the budget Datsun brand that we normally use in Tier 2 markets into the US market with a range of electric/hybrid small & medium SUV, light truck and 2 door sports hatch.