How writing for Jalopnik got me out of a speeding ticket

"HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute" (hondoyota) 04/29/2019 at 11:30 • Filed to: SR20

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By David Tracy— King of Oxidation!

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 11:33

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SR20? *Takes drag of cigaret* I haven’t heard that name in years.   

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. 04/29/2019 at 11:35

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Now are you going to tell me your war stories about the Kinja transition

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 11:37

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I would call the police on him as well.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 11:38

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I knew this would happen.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 11:39

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*ignoring yammering millennial *, It was a simpler time... Nibbles running around a physical data center and not a cloud in sight... Quote of the day earned you a star delivered by a well endowed lady provided by Ms. $ kaycog. Ah de memories... 

Ash78, voting early and often > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 11:39

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I was trying really hard to make some kind of White Privilege joke out of that, but just couldn’t do it. Short version is that I would never, ever have pushed my luck the way he did in those situations (reaching behind the seat for my docs?!) . I guess I grew up fearing the police too much, but also just out of common courtesy. Like I would never sleep at a gas station without alerting the attendant first...so nobody would call the cops.

Maxima Speed > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 11:41

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Hmmm writing for Oppositelock hasn’t got me out of any tickets 

For Sweden > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. 04/29/2019 at 11:42

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user was starred for this post

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > Maxima Speed 04/29/2019 at 11:42

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You're just unlucky, E90M3 proved that can happen!

Honeybunchesofgoats > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 12:03

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“ “Yeah man, I’d never seen anyone fall asleep so quickly in my life. I figured you had a medical problem” he said, clearly trying to hide the fact that, deep down, he knew he was wrong for calling the authorities without even knocking on my window or talking with me. I was only six feet away”

Or, maybe, considering you pulled up to a fuel pump and promptly passed out, he thought you were a danger to others and was in no way obligated to ask you if you were cool with having the cops called.

Honeybunchesofgoats > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 04/29/2019 at 12:06

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He comes off as incredibly petty in his complaining about the guy who called the cops, and I say that as someone who generally loves his writing. 

Deltyn drives a meh car > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 12:13

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After reading David’s story, I’m not surprised he got the cops called on him twice, because it seems every do-gooder cant mind his or her own damn business. Also, I just schooled myself on this sr20 rule. Hoping someone asks for proof of anything I own so I can slap em in the face with irrifutable evidence. Turbo G20, slammed Corolla, blue Fiat x1-9, red fiat x1-9, early Confederate hellcat motorcycle, and now a CR-V. Test me

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. 04/29/2019 at 12:14

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Deep cuts

syntax-check demands a 5 seater honda element > Ash78, voting early and often 04/29/2019 at 12:18

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yep this scene basically ran through my head when i saw the headline.

For Sweden > Ash78, voting early and often 04/29/2019 at 12:25

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When you go to Mr. Jefferson’s University , you do not need to fear cops.

Chariotoflove > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 12:28

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I am confused.  I can’t figure out if that article is a well disguised homage or a truly bizarre case of life imitating art.

Ash78, voting early and often > syntax-check demands a 5 seater honda element 04/29/2019 at 12:29

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Love that show.

Deep down inside, even as a 40-year-old white man with cops as friends, I’m still a 16-year-old miscreant who doesn’t trust cops’ motives in most traffic stops.

As an adult, I’ve never been let off with a warning, but I’ve never been frisked/cuffed either....so I’m still neutral on it all.

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > Chariotoflove 04/29/2019 at 12:37

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HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > Deltyn drives a meh car 04/29/2019 at 12:40

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Lemme see that CR-V you claim to have, I myself am quite the purveyor of said vehicle. It is very well known in these parts about my glorious 5.5 second 0 -to-60-p ulling CR-V

Deltyn drives a meh car > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 12:44

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1500$ of awesome!

Maxima Speed > For Sweden 04/29/2019 at 13:01

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The feels

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Honeybunchesofgoats 04/29/2019 at 13:02

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Yeah I’d be worried to wake him up myself after seeing stuff like this:

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. 04/29/2019 at 13:06

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Rip J km, S hant, Xander, dick saplenti, and others

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > Deltyn drives a meh car 04/29/2019 at 13:31

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ooh a first gen...i have the 4th gen and i’d much rather have the one you have....is it manual?

David Tracy > Honeybunchesofgoats 04/29/2019 at 13:38

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I wasn’t really upset, just a little baffled. I myself like the concept of talking to your fellow human before calling the authorities.

David Tracy > Honeybunchesofgoats 04/29/2019 at 13:39

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I still think it’s the right call to talk to your fellow citizen prior to calling authorities, especially if there’s no reason to think that person is a threat, and especially if you think that person might need a bit of medical help.

But in any case, I can appreciate that he was looking out for me.

Deltyn drives a meh car > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 13:40

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Unfortunately not, and it’s only fwd. .. It makes for a good dog and toddler hauler though. 

David Tracy > Ash78, voting early and often 04/29/2019 at 13:42

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I asked the officer if I could reach behind the seats. Also, the nap was only five minutes! 

Ash78, voting early and often > David Tracy 04/29/2019 at 14:21

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Argh, I thought this was a #SafeSpace and free from TRIGGERS!! Who let David in??

I keed — I honestly think your trip sounded pretty epic and I’m jealous. But it also did make me wonder if certain people can pull off the “slumming it road trip” a little more easily than others. You know you could re-tone the article for The Root, right?

( I figured you probably had the presence of mind to ask the officer before reaching for something, but it still jumped out at me.)

David Tracy > Ash78, voting early and often 04/29/2019 at 14:24

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You make good points.

Honeybunchesofgoats > David Tracy 04/29/2019 at 14:30

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I see where you’re coming from, but for all he knew, you were drunk and passed out and he did not want to get involved.

Anecdotally, I once found a guy passed out on my front step at 3 AM. I figured it was just a drunk college kid, and didn’t want to bother trying to have a conversation with him, so I called EMS. Turns out he had a warrant out  for probation violations and a   very much illegal handgun stuffed into his waistband. I don’t regret not having a conversation with his drunk ass about whether he wanted me to call an ambulance. 

Honeybunchesofgoats > David Tracy 04/29/2019 at 14:33

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I get that, but I also get why he might not have wanted to confront you about it. I mean, granted, you don’t look like the kind of guy who is going to shoot someone over that kind of thing, but people do get shot over that kind of thing.

Honeybunchesofgoats > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 04/29/2019 at 14:34

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Yup. My thoughts exactly. 

David Tracy > Honeybunchesofgoats 04/29/2019 at 14:35

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I can see that. Some folks are less inclined to want to get involved and interact with a random stranger.

I can respect that.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 15:28

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I'm not even gonna click that, calling bullshit because nothing that man owns is capable of exceeding the speed limit.

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/29/2019 at 15:50

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it was in a school zone

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 04/29/2019 at 15:56

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I still call BS. His stuff is jank.

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/29/2019 at 16:08

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further proving my case that this is another sr20 moment :/