TEOTWAWKI

"Maxima Speed" (maximaspeed)
04/08/2019 at 13:02 • Filed to: Spreading Panic

The end is nigh my brothers and sisters. Embrace the void as it embraces you. GMG descends into the pit and with it your souls. Kinjas wrath knows no bounds.

DISCUSSION (26)

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Maxima Speed
04/08/2019 at 13:13

Huh?

nerd_racing > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
04/08/2019 at 13:16

GMG got sold to an investment group . So who knows if OPPO will survive the culling to save costs.

user314 > Maxima Speed
04/08/2019 at 13:20

Future Heap Owner > Maxima Speed
04/08/2019 at 13:26

I’m fairly optimistic. We cost almost nothing, and the ad revenue from the Ultimate Ground Speed Check article alone should justify Oppo’s continued existence.

Honeybunchesofgoats > Maxima Speed
04/08/2019 at 13:35

This might not be a bad scenario. The future CEO of the properties was in charge of online for Forbes and ZD, so there’s experience there, and the company that acquired GMG wasn’t previously in online publishing, which means that there’s no risk of GMG properties overlapping (like A.V. Club and iO9 did), and that also presumably avoids the kind of shit that came when AOL bought Engadget and it’s sister blogs

In terms of Oppo’s survival, it’s probably a good thing that they weren’t bought out by a company that has existing properties, since that would have made it more likely to roll over the new properties to whatever the pre existing commenting system was.

I don’t see anything about whether Kinja was included in the sale, but why the fuck would Univision want to hold on to that?

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > nerd_racing
04/08/2019 at 13:37

Oh god. It’s worse than that. It’s so much fucking worse .

They sold to Great Hill Partners.

https://pitchbook.com/profiles/investor/10058-77

They’re a “loot, pillage, sell” shop. That is all they do. They bought ZoomInfo at fire sale prices in ‘17 (revenue of $72.8MEUD, they paid $240M USD,) pillaged the personal information and proprietary technology, then sold the carcass to DiscoverOrg (a direct competitor) STUPID cheap.

They have a negative interest in journalism, and absolutely do not invest in their acquisitions. Quoth themselves: “We provide private equity to finance the expansion, recapitalization, or acquisition of mid-market growth companies.”

Translation: “we buy distressed assets cheap, loot them for what we want, then discard the corpse successfully exit.” They are solely exit focused.

https://www.greathillpartners.com/great-hill-partners-successfully-exits-ascenty-in-1-8-billion-plus-transaction/

https://www.greathillpartners.com/plansource-announces-acquisition-by-vista-equity-partners/

https://www.greathillpartners.com/custom-ink-welcomes-new-investors-led-by-great-hill-partners/

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Honeybunchesofgoats
04/08/2019 at 13:43

It’s worse. Great Hill is a purely exit focused firm. They have no interest in keeping GMG more than 2-3 years absolute tops, and absolutely zero interest in investing in journalism.

The guy you’re saying isn’t so bad? He’s the shithead who came up with “Forbes Contributors” (the absolute sham articles that are plastered ALL OVER their site like ‘vaccines cause autism.’)

Honeybunchesofgoats > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 13:45

Oh... well, shit.

LOREM IPSUM > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 14:03

Well that escalated quickly.

If we have an honest interest in maintaining this community, we might want to begin collaborating on an alternative platform.

You seem pretty brilliant. C onsidering your corporate oppressors are both contemptible and incompetent, any chance of sticking a proverbial box in the corner of your server room?

I jest, but in all seriousness, we should probably come up with an exit strategy of our own.

MrSnrub > Maxima Speed
04/08/2019 at 14:25

Damn, and I just got authorship . Time to furiously shitpost!

Ssfancyfresh > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 15:02

Interesting. I’ll be following the Custom Ink transition closely. We buy custom shirts through them a few times a year. It has always been an extremely positive experience. I hope that doesn’t change.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Ssfancyfresh
04/08/2019 at 15:08

They’re exit focused, so chances in that case that they provided a bunch of cash to grow the business and exit quickly. In that case, they’re an investor rather than an owner. (They do both.)

In the GMG case, they’re buying the whole thing outright and taking ownership. Those are the assets they loot and pillage.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > LOREM IPSUM
04/08/2019 at 15:48

My current oppressors are not incompetent so no luck in coloing a box there unnoticed. (I switched employers, thank fuck .) That said, people oft forget I do have... fairly substantial private infrastructure, to put it mildly.

What I don’t have, is the time to locate and prove out alternative software. Stand it up, sure. All the web dev? No way. I don’t do much (really anything) with it and I’m months behind on way more critical projects (MONO_VERSION, ReleaseBuilder, Stormcaller computers, need to update the SSJ, ugh, I’m gonna curl up in a ball and cry.)

But i f someone wants to figure out the software, I can probably take a look, see what it would take.

LOREM IPSUM > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 16:16

Glad to hear you moved on from the hellhole you were in earlier. I must have missed that, but good to know as it sounded unpleasant to put it mildly.

Software is a big question mark, isn’t it? I’d imagine something off the shelf exists that’s somewhat similar in layout to what we’re familiar with here , but I wouldn’t know where to begin to find or implement it. We’re obviously not about to pay ol’ Eddie Lambert over there licensing for kinja though, I’m sure. (Sorry, my mistake, was thinking o f a different empire killing vampire. )

Something tells me that slapping up a phbb or vbb forum isn’t going to cut it these days , for a plethora of reasons, though I’d still visit.

Thoughts, anyone?

Just Jeepin' > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 16:29

Wordpress seems like the default choice for a blog platform, although my limited experience with it hasn’t been stellar . I’ll play a bit this week

wafflesnfalafel > nerd_racing
04/08/2019 at 16:47

quick! someone make up some BS ROI numbers!

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > LOREM IPSUM
04/08/2019 at 18:14

It was a hellhole and making me literally suicidal. I have never been more glad to be rid of a place and never less concerned about what state I left it in.

As to Kinja, well, straight up I’ll tell you right now that it is a unique and special snowflake because it’s a bunch of 20-somethings who insist on reinventing the wheel. Which is also why it’s a complete shitshow (and probably infinitely worse under the covers. I’m thinking... MySQL backend of a 2012 vintage, no DBAs, running on CentOS 5 or Ubuntu 14.10 or 15.) The kind of shit they wouldn’t license because it’s un- licensable.

And no, phpBB/vB both suck, and you all would actually have to pay me then. No, seriously . Just keeping up with security patching that shit is a 10 hour a week job. (Also vB is fucking expensive . $400 every upgrade . Though if you want to pass around the plate to buy me another server for the VMware cluster so it doesn’t struggle on a schedule, I wouldn’t say no.)

But other than those, seriously, let’s hear it. I’m literally set up in house for OS development. Porting whatever the flavour du jour to FreeBSD probably would take me ... call it an hour because there’s always plist shenanigans.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Just Jeepin'
04/08/2019 at 18:18

Multi-user WordPress is FUCKING CANCER . Also, WordPress is FUCKING CANCER . I used to be on WordPress handling a LOT of hits. We’re talking “I did most popular Oppo article, every day ” hits.

You have NO idea how many hours it takes to keep a WP install secure, much less free of spam. I had to purge spam every 4 hours or MySQL would start shitting itself. Every decent ‘security’ plugin has a pseudo-free version and a $100+/year version, and you need a half dozen of them. Nevermind how WP itself destroys the underlying infra because it’s so poorly written and all PHP.

Ugh. Never. A. Fucking. Gain. There’s a reason there are companies making big money off doing nothing more than half-assing WP hosting.

Just Jeepin' > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 18:25

Ok, so we’ll call that Plan B.

LOREM IPSUM > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 18:52

I f this thread doesn’t draw enough attention, perhaps another dedicated to the topic might be a good idea to increase the chances of the right eyes seeing it . From the sound of things you’re willing and more than able, so if the rest of the pieces can come together we might just have a viable shot. I wish I had more to offer to further the concept.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Just Jeepin'
04/08/2019 at 18:57

We’re calling that PLAN ZZC.

Plan ZZB is CHISELING POSTS INTO STONE TABLETS TO BE TRANSPORTED BY ASS.

Just Jeepin' > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
04/08/2019 at 19:01

Is Goatse guy even available?

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > Just Jeepin'
04/08/2019 at 19:06

Correction. WordPress is now ZZD.

Goatse guy, we’ll be in touch.

Just Jeepin' > LOREM IPSUM
04/08/2019 at 19:29

I have to say, I don’t think anything will work. Uprooted communities don’t generally stick together.

I think it’s here or nowhere.

Hope I’m wrong.

LOREM IPSUM > Just Jeepin'
04/08/2019 at 19:38

I hope you are wrong as well, though there is a good chance you’re right. I think our best bet would be to parallel early, so when they finally yank the cord everyone will know where to regroup.

Anyone know who owns and maintains https://oppositelock.com ?

Just Jeepin' > LOREM IPSUM
04/08/2019 at 20:11

You’re absolutely right. In fact, I think a free Slack instance would be a good way to start preparing right away.