"Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)" (roadsterzach)
04/05/2019 at 16:26 • Filed to: None
1
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"Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)" (roadsterzach)
04/05/2019 at 16:26 • Filed to: None | 1
| 15 |
Currently questioning just how screwed I am after making a terrible decision. I did not pay a single one of my credit cards last month. After four surgeries and lots of time in/out of the hospital, I had to shell out over $3k for my co-pays.
~World Rally Blue BRZ for your time~
!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!
Because of that, I just didn’t have any money to cover the credit card payments. We paid our rent, car payment, insurance, and had a little left over for gas and next to nothing left over for food (our cupboards and fridge are still shockingly nearly empty).
And now I’m in a similar position today. All my cards are due today, but I can’t pay them until the 10th when I get my measly check from SSI plus my better half gets her next paycheck . On top of that, I can’t pay them all in full either. I can easily pay my regular monthly minimums plus one late fee this month on all of them - but instead since I skipped last month I owe two months worth of minimums plus two months of late fees.
My plan is to pay as many cards as I can, starting with the ones with the lowest payments needed, and to stop when I run out of money. That means out of my eight cards, I can pay five of them. So on my credit report, I’ll have one month’s worth of missed payments and two on a few lines.
I feel like after missing two months worth of payments, the credit card companies are going to be super pissed and maybe close the accounts to collections? I tried calling the three that I can’t pay this month and last month, but got nothing useful. They told me I either pay the two months worth of balances this month, or they’ll file against me or send it to collections.
I really can’t afford either.
My better half has been working her ass off, maxing out the overtime she can work without getting in huge trouble. Instead of her usual 40 hours of work, she’s been clocking 49-54 hours depending on the week the last three weeks. It helps, but it’s not enough. Plus she can’t do that this week or next, as management caught onto all the extra hours and told her to give it a two week break.
Now she’s looking into getting a second job which I don’t want her to do, as she’d be working at least 14 hours a day most days, plus working 4-6 hours on her current days off - so she’d have no days off to recover from such a workload and I’d never really see her at home much anymore. Her not being around as much could be problematic too, as after all my operations last month I am fairly bedridden for now, as walking is painful and requires a great deal of time. I have to use a cane to get anywhere now, which at 26 sucks.
For our budget, our priorities are as follows: Rent (+ Utilities), Car (Payment - Gas - Ins), Girlfriend’s Student Loans, Food, Girlfriends’ Credit Cards, My Credit Cards, anything left over goes to savings.
I’ve talked to a few friends, and while they want to help, they can’t. My parents can’t help, since they pay my insurance each month and are paying one of my brother’s bills (he lost his job, had to move back in with my parents and my parents had to pay $4.5k to get him out of his lease. He still has car payments and massive credit debt to pay as well, which all falls on my parents now). I already feel terrible with how much time my parents take off work to get me to appointments on top of the $2k my insurance costs them each month plus $1.5k each month in chemo co-pays.
My better half’s parents can’t help either, as my soon to be father in law got injured at work, hasn’t worked in two weeks and won’t be cleared to return for another month and a half. Her parents were already just scrapping by and now have to borrow money from both her grandparents just to pay their bills.
All of my friends are telling me to just say fuck it, not pay the cards for three months and file for bankruptcy. I really don’t want to do that though, since it would trash my already ruined credit score (went from 750 to mid-500s) and cost a ton to go through with. I normally wouldn’t care as much since I have terminal cancer, except I’m the co-signer on our ND Miata, and we can’t afford to lose that car in a bankruptcy filing - we’d have no way to get around or get her to work (her commute is a 10-15 minute drive in the morning, taking the bus would take her 3 hours to complete the same route).
Plus I’m worried about bankruptcy and them going after any assets I have - which is nothing. I’ve sold pretty much everything I own in Jan/Feb except for some books, a few D&D pieces, my TV, laptop and X-Box. Everything else belongs to my better half in our apartment - but from my understanding is since I live with her (without being married yet) they could go after her belongings as well.
My other concern would be wage garnishment - I get a ridiculous $425 from the Fed each month, and we need that to make our budget work. Plus it sounds like they maybe able to garnish her wages too since we live together.
My girlfriend’s parents suggested looking into some of those debt relief programs, but with my ruined credit most won’t take me and they seem super sketchy. I have no idea how they can get your balance down to 25% of what you owe, offer you a monthly plan to pay that off and make money themselves. There has to be a catch, but I can’t figure it out.
I’ve had a few friends offer to help set up a GoFundMe, but I honestly doubt that would work. Ideally we’d need to raise $4.5k to get in the clear on all our accounts, settle a medical bill in collections and make up all the savings we spent paying my last hospital bill. Between my girlfriend and myself, we have maybe 650 Facebook friends. If a quarter of them donated (and I suspect less than a quarter would even see it thanks to FB’s algorithms) $10-20 - that would still only net us $1600-$3000 before GoFundMe takes their cut. I could try sharing it here and in own of the fandom communities I’m a “VIP” in, but that feels really scummy to me.
I’m honestly at a loss of how to move forward from her, and the anxiety + stress + fear are eating away at me. Especially with the companies sending me 3-4 robocalls per day from each card (on top of the 10-15 robocalls I get in Chinese about the IRS). I have enough to deal with fighting cancer everyday and that hardship that’s wrecking my body - I really don’t want to have to deal with this. I just don’t know how to proceed from here.
Thoughts? Ideas? Bankruptcy, Kickstarter, just let the cards go to collections? Even if you have nothing to add, a good luck or hi is still nice. I miss you all on here, wish I was more active than just lurking on my phone.
TheRealBicycleBuck
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 17:18 |
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Contact your student loan provider and ask them for a deferment or forbearance. Contact the credit card companies and explain the situation. Often they will freeze your credit and put a temporary reduction on your payments. Just make sure you are talking to the companies.
CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 17:20 |
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I wish you the best of luck. The US system seems so cruel
LOREM IPSUM
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 17:27 |
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Go find a bankruptcy trustee and talk to them. They usually give free consultations. You won’t necessarily lose your car or furnishings, and may walk away free and clear of any an d all debt without it costing you a nickel . If your credit is already trashed, it just means it’ll be trashed for a while longer, but at this point screw worrying about money if you don’t have to. That said, if you expect any further big expenses to come in you might want to wait until they do, because any debt incurred after you file you’ll still be responsible for.
Fuck cancer. I’m so sorry to hear what you, and your family, are dealing with. Wish I had some meaningful way to actually be of some help . Tell that malignant son of a bitch that I’ll s ee him in hell, and I hold grudges. Best wishes man. Best wishes
VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 17:30 |
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This is a complex difficult problem to solve. I’ve been there, the phone calls are no fun, the anxiety is destructive, and the icing on top is your precarious health.
Filing for bankruptcy is a pretty painful decision that will affect you and people around you for 7 years and should not a thing you consider right away, until it looks like no other option is left.
My sister once did a GoFundMe after her divorce and had nothing left, and some people did help out. Based on your situation even if they don’t pay I don’t think they wouldn’t be able to at least sympathize. It doesn’t feel great, I know, but everyone asks for help once a while.
A ND Miata is still worth a chunk of cash. If you’re not upside down in it, or if the payments are rather large, what about trading down to a cheaper Toyota or some such? It’s a huge bummer, I know, but it may help avoid further expense and also lower your car insurance.
Also, student loans (unless your account is in a bad standing) typically have bereavement options for Federal type loans, which may be able to cut you a break for.
The IRS does payment plans. If you intend to pay, reach out to them for help in paying. They only time the IRS deploys the haterade is if you have no intention of paying.
Debt consolidation agencies are everywhere and you are correct that most of them are pretty shady. I’m sorry but all I can say for that is be very very careful checking those out - and they often will not do anything you can not do yourself on the phone.
Also, even if you can’t pay fully, partially paying some of those credit card fees with a promise to pay later may buy you another chunk of time before they send things to collections. Talking to them on the phone may help you waive some of those fees if you pay partially as well.
I don’t know how much of what I said is feasible for you, but I wish you well and hope you manage to help you and yours claw out of this. I’ve been there and it’s hard, so I feel you.
Chuckles
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 17:45 |
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Hi Z!
I don’t have any financial advice but it’s good to hear from you.
BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 17:48 |
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This is adjacent to my line of work, so first let me say: take a breath. Money is just money, there’s ways to work through it.
The priority of your debts should be: f ood, housing, transport, secured loans (student loans), credit cards, medical. Unless the doctors require your account to be fully paid in order to see you, of course.
Most doctors will work with you, even to pay copays. Call the credit card companies and explain your medical issues and ask for either a forebearance of fees or a reduced minimum payment. Credit card and other unsecured debt won’t transfer to a non-spouse; they may transfer depending on your state if you’re married.
Keep your car payments current. Keep your rent as current as you can. Buy food and medicine. Pay even a few dollars each month to the CCs, even if it’s below the minimum. Scary men in black suits aren’t going to show up and seize your couch.
RPM esq.
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 18:04 |
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You’re not married, you don’t own a home, your credit has already been trashed, and you don’t foresee catching up on your credit cards, but you and your partner are otherwise capable of making your car payments, correct? Bankruptcy (for you, not your partner) is probably the correct solution. Take some steps to insulate her and the car first—extract yourself from anything you’re co-signed on, such as by selling the car to her and having her refinance it in her name only, or sell it and have her buy her own car without a co-signer.
In a chapter 7 bankruptcy, the trustee will liquidate some of your property to get something to your creditors, and then your debt will likely be discharged completely. The exact list depends on your state’s laws, but it’s not like they’ll sell your clothes ...based on the list you provided, figure your x-box and TV might be toast but you’ll be able to keep essentials . Your credit will be fucked, but not any moreso than sending multiple credit cards to collections, and probably less than if you did that and ended up in bankruptcy six months later anyway . In a chapter 13 bankruptcy, you’d have a longer-term repayment plan overseen by a trustee to pay back your debt, and a stay of collections actions.
The bottom line is that credit card debt is not secured by any collateral, so if that’s what you have and you can’t get out of it any other way, a Chapter 7 discharge is probably what you need, assuming you can keep your girlfriend and the car out of it . If you can’t separate your debt and your partner’s and are worried about defaulting on the car loan, and think you might be able to catch up on the cards with a repayment plan over time , Chapter 13 would probably be the way to go. Talk to a bankruptcy lawyer or trustee. Sooner rather than later.
ZHP Sparky, the 5th
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 18:15 |
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Sorry to hear this, sounds like a really rough time and it’s good of you to try limit your GF taking more on her shoulders even given everything you’re going through . It sounds like at least some cash flow relief will help you in the short run – and you had mentioned making minimum credit card payments is easily doable. So I’d say DO THAT at least for a few months, just to give yourself some breathing room. Tough times like these are exactly what having open credit card accounts are for – obviously don’t let those balances languish forever, but it’s OK to keep paying minimums for a few months while you figure stuff out .
Bankruptcy, although I don’t know much about it, isn’t quite as easy as just saying fuck it and shouting it out loud. It’ll follow you around for a long time as well. Obviously if it comes to that it is what it is, life and your health is more important than finances. But at this point just try to ease up on the CC payments a little, maybe call them and try getting the minimum payments reduced further if possible, just so you’re not stressing about putting food on the table or getting to the doctor. Don’t rush in to anything but do you have any assets you don’t absolutely need you could put on the market and sell (second/third car, spare wheel sets, tools, etc.)? I’d focus on these later and slowly so you don’t let go of stuff for way less than what they’re worth and actually get market value for whatever you do decide to let go.
Montalvo
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 18:23 |
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It’s good to see you popping up. T hat is a rough spot to be in and I am definitely not knowledgeable enough to give advice on the best course of action. Are you a part of any religion with a house of worship ? For my church it isn’t uncommon for everyone to give a helping hand when someone is in desperate need. I don’t think a kickstarter or any donations page would hurt. The more convenient it is to donate the more people would do it. If you do make one I will definitely chip in some cash. I have a family member going through rounds of chemo right now and the last round didn’t seem to do much. It hurts seeing a family member struggle but can’t imagine how it feels to be the one fighting through it. Whatever path you take moving forward I wish you all the best.
ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 18:23 |
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Sadly, I don’t have much more than good vibes to send you way.
Like someone else has mentioned, talking to the student loan folks is highly worth doing. There are a number of deferment or forbearance options on those that you all might qualify for. I’d also point out that if you’re not married yet, your significant other is only on the hook for any accounts that you both signed on. Getting married will change that.
On the getting sued thing, that might be much more of an empty threat at this early stage then it feels like. Revolving accounts usually get kicked to collections (often in house first), outside collections, and only then are they usually considered for legal action. CC companies don’t want to have to sue you. Many states have started to wised up to the robosign ing practices that were prevalent in the consumer collections space where paper mill law firms file huge quantities of suites with dubious vetting on the bet that most debtors won’t even respond and they’ll win by default judgement. Suing on a consumer debt often requires owing enough to be worth going after, and then determining there is some likelihood of collecting on a judgement (non-exempt assets that could be sized, real property to place lien against or wages to garnish).
It sounds like talking to a bankruptcy attorney may be a really good idea for you. Most attorneys will do consultations for free, and you can get a really good idea of where you actually stand, what the options are and what the outcomes might be. There is probably also an estate planning aspect of this that comes into play, and it might be that winning on that is defined as minimizing the impact on your significant other down the road.
I know a lot of people fear bankruptcy, or are ashamed by the prospect, but I don’t think that’s the best way to look at it. The process is designed to allow a debtor to get a fresh start from a bad situation while preserving the rights of creditors to the greatest extent possible. Every credit account is a calculated risk by all parties involved, and sometimes they don’t work out. The reasonable resolution is finding a way forward that allows everyone to move on, and that’s what bankruptcy is for. If you don’t own real property, it tends to make the cases much simpler.
Every state has some type of homestead exemption to allow a debtor to retain some interest in real and personal property that is off limits to creditors. The idea is so that the debtor has enough to start over again with. It sounds like you may not have much, if any, non-exempt assets, which can make the bankruptcy decision a whole lot more clear. Most states allow for retaining a car (or interest in a car) up to a certain amount. On a financed car, that is interest is usually to value of the car (usually at “firesale” or wholesale value) minus whatever is owed on it. Depending on how much you owe on the ND, it might be entirely possible that your interest on it falls within the homestead exemption and an agreement can be reached between the court’s trustee, you all and the lien holder on it to exclude it from the bankruptcy estate. This is the kind of thing where a bankruptcy attorney in your state can advise you on the options and likely outcomes.
Whatever happens, I wish you the best.
HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 18:30 |
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I don’t know man. I really wanna help but i’m no more than a stupid teenager with no experience in anything. I do wanna say how this is similar to my parents, my mom is the one who’s working while my dad is stuck at home because he can’t work (cancer, diseases, aneurysms, stroke, stage 4 kidney disease, and more) and we’re barely living off my mom’s paycheck and dad’s disability from the gov’t. I’m scrambling to get a job (just turned 16) but that requires me to have a car to get to and from which is more payments that we can’t afford. We also recently bought a house to get away from my toxic grandparents/aunt who p urposely stressed out my parents in an attempt to kill them (they even said it for god’s sake) and now we have those payments too. It’s really, really hard times. However; we’re thinking of getting me into the airline industry with some training due to the education i received at the now defunct aviation school i went to (P.S., it closed down mid- school year and now im stuck homeschooling which absolutely blows, its a whole district lawsuit and everything and i have to testify as a witness too) and from there get me a job but sporadically buy me a car and insurance too to get to and from said job and hope that the income from that combined with my mom’s and dad’s disability can somewhat pay off my car insurance and any car payments if needed. So yeah, i definitely fully understand the struggle, though you might have it worse than I do because of the terminal cancer. All i can say is stay strong and keep your head up and wish for the best while preparing for the worst. You got me rooting for you, for what it’s worth. You’re not alone and the most i can do is try to relate with you and offer moral support. Good luck and I wish you the absolute best man. (damn i just realized i wrote a lot lol sorry bout that )
Khalbali
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 18:34 |
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My wife and I just finished our bankruptcy, mainly due to medical bills from when she had shit insurance, but I gave up my NC too since I was upside down quite a bit on it. It’s really not too bad of a process if it comes to it, and you could probably meet with a lawyer for free. However, I really don’t think you need to stress so much, especially now. My wife’s issues are all mental health related, and its really not worth the stress, we spent years working multiple jobs trying to make any progress at all and just could never get ahead of it. Money is just money, credit score is just a number, as long as you have a roof and food don’t stress the rest. I think it’s usually at least 3 months before stuff goes to collections anyways, and if it does you can usually negotiate with them. Literally nothing is more important than your health though, so I would just not even worry about it right now. Feel better, let us know how you’re doing, and if you’re still behind closer to 3 months maybe try to work something out then. I would start with a financial counselor, we found ours through a list of approved counselors for pre-bankruptcy consultations and it was totally free and she was really awesome, she even called some of the hospitals to try to negotiate for us. I would start here -
Just remember, they can’t take what you don’t have, bankruptcy isn’t that bad if it comes to it, you could keep the ND anyways you just sign a reaffirmation agreement saying you agree to continue paying the debt, but none of it is wor th your health or sanity. Feel free to message me too if you have any more questions or if there’s anything I can do to help, but the bills will still be there when you’re feeling better so focus on yourself first.
smobgirl
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 19:05 |
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I have no useful advice on bankruptcy or anything else but I’d happily contribute to a gof undme if you go that route. I know it sucks to ask for help and it sucks even worse to be in the position you’re in, but you guys shouldn’t have to be so stressed about money right now.
nermal
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 19:07 |
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On the ( very bluntly morbid) positive side, you’re still here. If you can beat cancer, dealing with missed payments to credit card companies will be relatively easy.
One missed payment is not the end of the world. Pay the payments on the ones that you can & get caught up if you can . Don’t get too stressed over it, for you are merely a number to credit card companies. Treat them the same in return.
punkgoose17
> Z (ND + Cancer Fighter)
04/05/2019 at 23:13 |
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I can't read all the long responses now, but if you pay the interest on each card plus $1 it should stop the credit companies from sending you to collections. They will be "mad" but they are still making their money. My cousin had to do this during a rough patch, but obviously less rough than yours.