Thought experiment: Car types that don't exist

"If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee) 11/14/2019 at 12:49 • Filed to: None

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We all wax over the fact that our ideal brown, RWD, manual, rotary M iata wagon doesn’t exist, but that’s not the only combination that’s not a thing. Post up a car type that you don’t think exists, and see if anyone can prove you wrong.

I'll start: SUVs with frameless windows. The closest thing to that I can think of is a Subaru Forester, but that's more of a lifted wagon than an SUV.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 12:58

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Luxury unicycles.

Am I  doing this right?

InFierority Complex > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 11/14/2019 at 13:04

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Would you classify this as a unicycle or a tricycle?

TheRealBicycleBuck > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 13:04

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Flying car. There are some prototypes out there, but nothing has made it into production.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 13:06

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Cab forward manual RWD sports car.

Thomas Donohue > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 13:07

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Stock WRX

PHEV with decent electric range

U n- optioned Porsche

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 11/14/2019 at 13:08

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MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > InFierority Complex 11/14/2019 at 13:08

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Unicycle, unless your face is also on the ground, then it’s a tricycle.

For Sweden > TheRealBicycleBuck 11/14/2019 at 13:11

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gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Thomas Donohue 11/14/2019 at 13:12

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If it’s a hybrid, why does it need a long range?

Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 13:16

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A cheap small pickup truck, available for sale in the US. Closest we’ve got is the Frontier.

Excuse my attempt to reason posting Joe Isuzu.  

OPPOsaurus WRX > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 11/14/2019 at 13:23

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Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 11/14/2019 at 13:23

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Ferrari 360/430? Ford GT?

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 13:25

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For real, a reasonably priced AWD manual subcompact 

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > OPPOsaurus WRX 11/14/2019 at 13:29

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Yes!

This is what we'll show whenever you publish anything on Kinja: > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 11/14/2019 at 13:29

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Just add a Brooks saddle

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 11/14/2019 at 13:30

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Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > OPPOsaurus WRX 11/14/2019 at 13:30

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Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 11/14/2019 at 13:31

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More like cab over. I guess cab forward would include rear engine cars.

just-a-scratch > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 13:31

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Hydrogen fuel cell powered pickup truck. Just imagine the range and towing it could have. 

MultiplaOrgasms > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 13:47

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M id-engined four seater sedans. With four full sized seats.

Just Jeepin' > Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! 11/14/2019 at 13:53

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I’ve been thinking about old Joe a lot since 2016. Not sure why.

ItalianJobR53 - now with added 'MERICA and unreliability > MultiplaOrgasms 11/14/2019 at 13:54

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Like an Espace F1 but more sedan-y

MultiplaOrgasms > ItalianJobR53 - now with added 'MERICA and unreliability 11/14/2019 at 13:57

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Like the Peugeot 908 RC but mass produced.

Thomas Donohue > gmporschenut also a fan of hondas 11/14/2019 at 14:00

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PHEV.  Maximize electric whenever possible, only use ICE when needed (long trip).   The new Volt actually gets 53 miles which is doable, most are 25, which is weak.

fintail > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 14:15

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Dignified/stately/classy modern Rolls-Royce/Bentley (or Maybach)

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 11/14/2019 at 14:15

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Suzuki SX4

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 14:17

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The one I want.

A New, small, economy, RWD, sports shooting brake, with a turbo I4, manual transmission, and heated cloth seats.

And as much window as possible, oh and 15” wheels. 

duurtlang > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 14:19

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2010+, hydraulic PS, manual transmission, <1100 kg curb weight, >1.3 hp per kg, seats 4 not-large adults with legs, cheaper (new) than the average purchase price of a car ($/€ 36k )

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 11/14/2019 at 14:19

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Sure, but how old are those now? I mean...I just want a new Justy. So bad. I’d buy one today.

Milky > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 14:20

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Small and cheap V8 powered car. Why cant someone make a Camaro quality car but the size of a C7 ? Hell even Miata size. Might be lower profit margin or something but you’d be in a class of your own.

The pony cars are all pretty damn big and even the C8 now weighs 3, 6 00 lbs.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 11/14/2019 at 14:23

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That does look like fun. As much as I like my AWD  e90 it’s just a bit too big to really throw around. My VR4 galant was a much better size for a fun car. The Justy would be even better 

functionoverfashion > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 14:37

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Amphibious flying car that can also escape Earth’s atmosphere. RWD, manual.

CobraJoe > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 11/14/2019 at 14:39

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A New, small, economy, RWD, sports shooting brake, with a turbo I4, manual transmission, and heated cloth seats.

And as much window as possible, oh and 15” wheels.  

Swap out that turbo 4 for a big V6 (or ideally an understressed V8), and I’m in 100%.  

CobraJoe > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 14:41

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Functional pony/muscle cars.

Basically, a RWD 2 door car that doesn’t force a compromise for rear seat head room or cargo space.

There were a few good options in the 80s, but it didn’t last that long.

VW Max > fintail 11/14/2019 at 14:55

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Isn’t that called a Toyota Century?

TheRealBicycleBuck > For Sweden 11/14/2019 at 15:05

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But most helicopters can’t do both....

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > CobraJoe 11/14/2019 at 15:13

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I’d actually be okay with going the other way. Make it a turbo I3 

fintail > VW Max 11/14/2019 at 15:13

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That or a non-sport/AMG S-class are the only real old guard left.

CobraJoe > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 11/14/2019 at 15:22

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Well, the obvious solution is to have multiple engine options.

You can have the turbo I3, and I’ll take the V8 with the same HP rating.  

ItalianJobR53 - now with added 'MERICA and unreliability > MultiplaOrgasms 11/14/2019 at 16:08

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TIL

Under_Score > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 16:35

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A new, compact, body-on-frame SUV.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > CobraJoe 11/14/2019 at 17:33

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So you want a old 5.0? 

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > TheRealBicycleBuck 11/14/2019 at 17:33

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Says who? Just put wheels on it 

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Under_Score 11/14/2019 at 17:39

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Yes we need a new Borno II

Under_Score > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 11/14/2019 at 18:54

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The Toyota 4Runner really can’t be the only game in town at this point. It’s taking advantage of the monopoly.

CobraJoe > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 11/14/2019 at 20:53

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Absolutely. The same torque curve as a low revving turbo 4, but with immediate power response and a better sound.

Love it.

But I know it’ll never happen again.  

fhrblig > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 21:54

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Rear-engined front-wheel-drive car?

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > fhrblig 11/14/2019 at 21:58

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Buckminster Fuller’s Dymaxion

fhrblig > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/14/2019 at 22:09

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Boo, I always forget about that thing. Or try to

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Thomas Donohue 11/15/2019 at 20:48

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The sad bit with the volt is the battery rang e is underrated unless your doing 65 with the heat.