Life update: goddamn shit edition

"Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To" (murdersofa) 01/24/2019 at 10:34 • Filed to: None

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hey remember how my landlord is a cunt well here we go again fuckers. Lynx Eventer for your time.

So my water heater burst this past weekend and whoever installed it didn’t put shutoff valves (literally $8 apiece) on the water lines going into it so I couldn’t shut it off. To further the stupidity, the utilities are on the 2nd floor so it was raining into the bathroom until maintenance came over and shut water off to the whole apartment until they could come replace the water heater the next day. My wife had a stomach bug so the lack of a flushing toilet was... an issue. I digress. The next morning they show up and fix the water heater and all is well. They make some vague mention of showing up at some point to fix the water damage in the bathroom but no date or timeline is mentioned and the dude doesn’t really speak English anyways so I figure I’ll get a call or something. Nope. Dude rocks into the apartment four days later without knocking or giving any prior notice at all and scares the shit out of my wife who doesn’t wear clothes when she’s at home. The next day I get a notice of violation of my lease because I guess the goddamn kitten missed the litter box and they’re crying about how it’s unsanitary and is going to ruin the tiles (??? it’s on bare concrete) and how I didn’t tell them I had cats which, I fucking did, I don’t fucking have to, and it doesn’t fucking matter because I paid my pet deposit which allows me however many pets I damn well please. After re-reading the lease, though, I noticed that they explicitly mention I have to have an automatic litter box which wasn’t mentioned in the violation but I guess I’m buying a $170 litter box now before they show up and bitch at me about it since they’ll be paying attention to that now.

And yes, entering the apartment like that is a violation of Kansas state statute 58-2557

Landlord’s right to enter; limitations. (a) The landlord shall have the right to enter the dwelling unit at reasonable hours, after reasonable notice to the tenant, in order to inspect the premises, make necessary or agreed repairs, decorations, alterations or improvements, supply necessary or agreed services, or exhibit the dwelling unit to prospective or actual purchasers, mortgagees, tenants, workmen or contractors. (b)The landlord may enter the dwelling unit without consent of the tenant in case of an extreme hazard involving the potential loss of life or severe property damage. (c)The landlord shall not abuse the right of access or use it to harass the tenant.

This is the same landlord that used an out-of-town towing company to attempt to tow my bikes (would have been $2000 to get them back if they removed them, had to pay $170 to make the tow truck driver go away) for not having parking permits. Permits that are never mentioned in the lease or the sign on the property which states “Parking for *apartment name* residents only” and as I am a resident and those were my registered and legal bikes and the sign didn’t even come close to meeting city requirements for verbiage or lettering size (yes I’m that fucking picky) they had no legal right to do shit with my bikes.

Fuck.

3 months till I buy a house but I have to not become homeless before then. God damn. I’m just surprised they aren’t bitching at me for the very nebulous “house is too dirty” horsefuckery that every landlord loves to leverage because, admittedly, we have way too much shit in this tiny little house which is why I’m buying a big house. I even have a $50/mo storage unit full of shit and my... I don’t want to self-diagnose but I believe it’s ADHD + bipolar disorder, makes keeping a house clean fucking impossible. I made some headway on my office last night until I got distracted by my bike’s wiring harness and tore the room apart again finding batteries and wiring tools and stuff and now I can’t even see my own floor.

EDIT: Local friend who has rented says the “reasonable notice” is a 24 hour in advance written note for non emergency entry.

someassemblyrequired > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 10:54

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Not sure what the rules are like where you are, but in CT you would not be required to pay for the time where there was not proper water supply, and the pet/parking issues would get the landlord slapped around in court.  I would document and take the landlord to small claims once you’ve moved out.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 10:57

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I’d shop for lawyers for that violation entering your apartment without notice.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > someassemblyrequired 01/24/2019 at 10:58

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We were out of water for less than 24hr so... whup de doo that’s like what seventeen dollars worth of rent? I’m sure my water bill this month will be fun for the few dozen gallons of water that got dumped out of the water heater but I don’t think I can prove what is due to the water heater breaking vs. normal usage.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) 01/24/2019 at 10:58

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Lawyers is pricey.

someassemblyrequired > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 10:58

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Yeah sometimes it’s easier to bite your tongue and just GTFO.

jimz > someassemblyrequired 01/24/2019 at 11:01

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withholding rent can be a tricky process, though. you can’t just say “hey, I ain’t payin’ you fuckers,” usually you have to get an attorney involved and set up an escrow account and put your rent payment in that. Basically you need to demonstrate that you are willing and able to pay your rent as agreed, if they correct the problem causing loss of use of the property. 

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > someassemblyrequired 01/24/2019 at 11:01

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Yeah, the only reasonable course of action is to keep my head down and try to make it out of here, and they know that. This shit is causing panic attacks of all kinds and it’s incredibly frustrating. Anxiety hasn’t spiked like this in a while.

someassemblyrequired > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 11:03

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You’ll get through it, any reason you need to stay 3 more months?   Houses are usually cheaper this time of year...

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 11:08

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Eh, you can usually find one willing to work for payment on victory. Especially if you have a very strong case, which, I’d say you do.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 11:15

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Last time I rented from a slumlord who was non-responsive and just smarmy , I reported our illegal living conditions to a private pest control company who contacted them and said they would have to report to the city anything they found (there’s some empty-threat in there, but the guy was like “this happens all the time. We can’t technically work for the tenant, but we can scare the shit out of your landlord”) . One hour later , my landlord calls and within a week, suddenly allllll the problems got fixed within a week!

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > someassemblyrequired 01/24/2019 at 11:17

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The specific house I’m buying is occupied until then.

Sovande > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 12:18

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What’s the eviction process like in your state or town ? My bet is that it takes longer than 3 months. If you want to go all in, just stop paying them.  

When I was in college I lived in a house that was sold halfway through the year to the next door neighbor who was tired of having a college house next door. He told he was going to kick us out as soon as he could. We took that to heart and never paid another dime as the process takes 60 days to start and another 3 months after that. So we lived rent free for 5 months and he cut our grass since it was his house after all.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Sovande 01/24/2019 at 12:24

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30 days notice.

E92M3 > Sovande 01/24/2019 at 14:18

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Where I live it’s about 3 weeks. They tend to act quickly and side with the person who’s paying property taxes. If you want a g uarantee to not be approved for a home loan for the next 7 years, get an eviction on your credit report.

Monkey B > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 16:18

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legally (in most states) you can be there longer if you game the system (as Sovande suggested) and be a dick. Here in Delaware it can take almost a year to legally remove someone from a rental home. My last landlords previous tenant was in the house 9 months without paying rent.

But I don’t recommend being a dick... don’t make life harder on you if you don’t have to. Also, always be super nice and polite...even when standing your ground and in the legal right. Never let them see you crack, it usually makes others more agreeable to your plight if you stay super calm and collected.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Monkey B 01/24/2019 at 16:35

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For sure. I just wonder why in the hell they insist on printing out and taping notes to people’s doors instead of just giving me a damn phone call.

Monkey B > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 17:04

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in my experience, property managers don’t like to talk. My last one I had for 5 years and after lease s igning spoke to once until move out. All e-mails, never answered the phone.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Monkey B 01/24/2019 at 17:14

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Shit emails’d be nice as well but they don’t have an email address.

Monkey B > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 01/24/2019 at 18:01

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sound like genuine slum lords

NojustNo > Sovande 01/25/2019 at 15:51

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Doesn’t doesn’t that mean you still get an eviction on your credit report? That seriously fucks up your chances of getting new places at all or at least without giant deposits.