Weekend Hot Taek - Beards are dumb, and partly grey beards are even dumber

"nermal" (nermal) 06/10/2018 at 10:52 • Filed to: Grooming, Hot Taeks, Do it for the nookie

0

51

Shave, you bums. It will make you look at least 10 years younger.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:05

18

What if I don’t want to look ten years younger?

interstate366, now In The Industry > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:07

2

No

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:09

3

holy shit its fred durst.... is his bisquit still limp?

(does that band still exist?)

fhrblig > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:10

10

No. I’ve had one for 15 years and I look (and feel) weird without one.

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:13

10

Just gonna leave this here:

Maxima Speed > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:14

4

Whoah, whoah, whoah!! No! You can have my beard when you shave it off my cold dead corpse.

nermal > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/10/2018 at 11:15

2

That means you haven’t reached the point where you have a midlife crisis and buy a Corvette and start creeping on girls 20 years younger than you.

nermal > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 06/10/2018 at 11:16

0

They’re on tour in Europe this summer!

Twingo Tamer - About to descend into project car hell. > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:19

9

This is a bad take.

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:19

0

O.o

welp.. im in europe.... i might give that a shot lol

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:21

8

You do not have to worry about me creeping on girls 20 years younger than me. Guys, on the other hand...

nermal > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 06/10/2018 at 11:22

1

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:22

8

Hey if it works for fictional characters...

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > fhrblig 06/10/2018 at 11:23

2

I dunno if I can ever go back to not having one.

Dusty Ventures > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:32

8

No. My beard hides my second chin

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:36

0

I keep a neatly groomed, very short goatee. It saves time in the morning as I can trim without looking and not slice my face. Yes, there is a little grey in it, but without it I look a little too young, much less than my half century plus.

Oh, and I drive a minivan by choice, and I don’t want to ask out the 28 year old at the office as I’d rather date someone closer to my own age, not her parents.

Chariotoflove > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:37

2

I have had this beard for 32 years. It is now more salt than pepper. The key to not looking nasty is to keep it trimmed.

HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:38

0

He looks like a dork without it. Not even his millions of dollars can make up for that

e36Jeff now drives a ZHP > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:39

1

Face hair maintenance is annoying. And I am highly susceptible to razor burn. Growing a beard was the best thing I ever did. Also the wife would not be happy with a beardless e36Jeff.

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:40

4

No.

My stubble keeps my face and neck from breaking out in acne. And I already look like I am 10 years younger than I really am even with the facial hair.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:43

0

I don’t want to look 13, so no.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) 06/10/2018 at 11:45

2

Yep, not only would I look 13 by OP’s logic, I would also have acne issues. I’ve shaved it before, it was horrible.

Wagon Guy drives a Boostang > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:54

2

No.

I’ve had my beard for so long that my kids don’t know what I look like without it. It’s entirely white now, but I keep it trimmed short. The giant bushy beard with short hair up top on the other hand can go away. This isn’t the 1800's.

duurtlang > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/10/2018 at 11:55

0

Ceeping on guys 20 years younger than you would be somewhat... creepy though, currently.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Dusty Ventures 06/10/2018 at 11:56

3

The Great Uniter

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > nermal 06/10/2018 at 11:58

2

I’m 30, I don’t want to look 20.

Sovande > nermal 06/10/2018 at 12:02

0

What about 100% gray beards?

BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind > nermal 06/10/2018 at 12:12

2

I’m on your side, bud. I look stupid with anything more than stubble and like that I can still be mistaken for a college student in my mid-30s. I hate how so many women fawn over guys with gross pube faces. Luckily my current gf agrees with me.

Sam > nermal 06/10/2018 at 12:18

0

If I could grow a beard, it would male me look less like a 17 year old (I’m 22). Unfortunately, I cannot completely, so I keep it clean until then.

Sam > HondoyotaE38: A Japanese and German Collab...wait a minute 06/10/2018 at 12:19

1

It’s kinda like one of those weight loss before-and-afters though. Where one is taken in crappy lighting with a sad face and the other is a happy face in good lighting. He is making an exceptionally dorky face in the clean pic.

Your boy, BJR > nermal 06/10/2018 at 12:26

0

I’m not bearded but me and my highway patrol ‘stache take issue with you telling us to shave.

gin-san - shitpost specialist > nermal 06/10/2018 at 12:32

0

What’s on a man’s face is his own business and probably the business of other people into which he shoves his face (spouse, mistress, second mistress, etc.).

That said, my facial hair situation is minimal and patchy. It’s sad that I have to shave everyday because if it grows to the point where it’s noticeable, it looks ragged and mostly gross.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > nermal 06/10/2018 at 12:33

2

I’ll take trimming periodically and compliments from ladies over daily shaving and razor burn thank you very much.

fhrblig > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/10/2018 at 12:42

3

The rare times that I’ve shaved it off, my partner always hates it.

fintail > nermal 06/10/2018 at 12:56

1

Don’t come to Seattle. I am a special snowflake as male over 20 who is clean shaven.

Svend > nermal 06/10/2018 at 13:19

0

No. I’m 38 and have been shaving since I was 12, heck I got a Panasonic battery powered shaver on my 12th birthday. I’ve had a moustache always since then and only shaved it off maybe two dozen times since than.

I started with my goatee beard when I was 18-19 and have rarely shaven it off.

I wet shave as I hate electric shavers, but blades are bloody expensive and I’m not going into the old style wet shaving.

More and more white/grey hair is growing through my goatee but that’s all me and I’m keeping it.

Monkey B > nermal 06/10/2018 at 13:40

3

this opinion changes drastically when the owner of said opinion can grow a beard. 

DipodomysDeserti > nermal 06/10/2018 at 13:56

2

Sorry, we can’t hear you over the sound of our awesome beards.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > nermal 06/10/2018 at 15:13

0

Can’t do it. I’ve had a beard almost continually since I was like 20 and my mom thinks I look weird without it even though half of the people I encounter seem completely unaware that it exists.

I also can’t shave fast enough. I’ll have a 5-o’clock shadow within hours.

You’re also wrong and should be ashamed of your wrongness. The problem with the beard in your post is that he doesn’t clean it up. Neck beard is something only transients and basement dwellers sport.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > fhrblig 06/10/2018 at 15:15

2

I get the same reaction from people around me. It’s like I’m meant to have a beard.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > BrianGriffin thinks “reliable” is just a state of mind 06/10/2018 at 15:20

0

I’ve known people that can’t do more than stubble without looking weird. I feel bad for them, but they also usually have skin that cooperates with constant shaving.

Beards actually repulse somewhere around 25-50% of people depending on the era. One of my mentors always spoke of how women that dislike beards won’t consider that they can be shaved, but those that like them will accept a shaved man and urge him to grow one.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > fintail 06/10/2018 at 15:26

0

I was odd with my beard when I lived in San Diego, but I’m totally normal here. It’s almost shocking how bearded this area is.

nermal > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time 06/10/2018 at 16:07

0

The guys on the top row look pretty badass.

The ones on the bottom look like they could be defeated by a toddler. All you need to do is steal their arthritis medicine, and ask them to open a jar of peanut butter.

fintail > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 06/10/2018 at 18:21

2

You’re definitely not in the minority.

PNW things: beards, dogs, Subarus, telling everyone how much you like beer, devoting inordinate amounts of time thinking and talking about real estate, etc.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > fhrblig 06/10/2018 at 19:09

1

I look like a bloated baby without one.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > fintail 06/10/2018 at 20:53

1

I don’t fit the Subaru and beer parts, but otherwise guilty.

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > nermal 06/10/2018 at 21:02

0

If I shave it off...my son will no longer recognise me. My partner may also struggle with recognition. It’s damn near old growth forest.

dsigned001 - O.R.C. hunter > nermal 06/10/2018 at 21:04

0

Creeping on girls 20 years younger would get me thrown in prison. Well, hopefully. I don’t think those guys get caught quite as often as they should. In any case, I’m younger than 38.

dsigned001 - O.R.C. hunter > Dusty Ventures 06/10/2018 at 21:07

1

Unfortunately this.

Chuckles > nermal 06/11/2018 at 00:25

0

My stance on shaving is the same as my stance on car washing: you’re wasting your time if you do it more than once a month and it takes you longer than 10 minutes.

I’m 32 with a partially gray beard, and I have no interest in looking ten years younger.

thejustache > nermal 06/11/2018 at 12:45

0

I trimmed my beard after growing it out for 6 months and my wife cried. Note: not tears of joy, tears of where the heck did my husband go and who is this boy you replaced him with?

Given that the only person I care about impressing is her, I will continue to remain bearded thank you very much