Well, that was close

"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck)
05/24/2018 at 19:30 • Filed to: None

There’s a spot on I-10 east of Lake Charles where Border Patrol agents like to sit in the median turnaround. It’s a good spot to watch eastbound traffic because it’s not far from a bridge and a curve in the highway. I’m not sure what Border Patrol is looking for there, but that’s where I always see at least one of their SUVs, usually two, sometimes more. [Edit]: I discovered that they are watching for illegals coming out of the port in Lake Charles. !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

I know the spot well and I usually slow down, but this morning, I wasn’t paying attention and zoomed by this spot with the cruise set on 85. This morning, a state trooper in an unmarked Charger was sitting in the median with them.

Whoops.

After I realized what I had done, I didn’t panic and hit the brakes. Instead, I reset the cruise down to 75 so it would slow down gradually. As I watched behind me, the cruiser pulled onto the freeway. About that time, I caught up to a guy cruising in the right lane. He had his window rolled down and was motioning for me to slow down as I rolled past. I bet that he was speeding as he went past the patrol and had slammed on his brakes to get under the limit. Since I was already coasting, I just eased by and moved over in front of him.

I was certain that the cop was going to pull me over. I wasn’t running, but I wasn’t going to admit guilt by stopping. I just figured I’d keep the cruise set to 75 and let him catch up to me. You can’t imagine my surprise when he decided to pull in behind the other guy and light him up! By the time he did it, I was at least a quarter mile ahead. I suppose that the other guy showed he was guilty by hitting the brakes and going the speed limit after that. Either that or God was watching and took pity on me.

After that little scare, I decided it was best to slow my roll. For the rest of the trip, I kept it under 80. :)

So, heads-up Oppos! If you’re traveling between Lake Charles and Lafayette on I-10, they’re watching you!

DISCUSSION (20)

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 19:57

Not just illegal immigrants, I-10 is a human trafficking super highway.

TheD0k_2many toys 2little time > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 20:04

Get a bike lol. Cops dont like to chase what they cant catch.

*dont actually take my advice*

WilliamsSW > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 20:20

Yeah, I kinda think that slamming the brakes is a huge tell. You did the right thing coasting down. IMHO it’s safer if you’re running in a crowd and less likely to lead to a chat with an ocifer.

ttyymmnn > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 20:37

I know that spot well from my drives between Houston and VA. I was driving through there once at about 2 am and passed a trooper (presumably) in the median. I wasn’t speeding all that much. He chose to light me up with bright headlights and all the spotlights as I drove by. He didn’t stop me, but he certainly made his presence known.

ttyymmnn > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 20:39

Another time, I was driving from Austin to Temple. This was back when I-35 was still 65 and under construction. I was easing past an old Suburban when I saw a trooper at the top of the hill. So I eased up and slid back behind the Suburban, which was being driven by an old Hispanic guy. The trooper came out after we passed and then came up on my back left side. He stayed there for at least a mile or two while we all went sixty. five. Then he pulled over the Suburban. Profiling? Maybe. Or expired tags, or who knows what.

TechJunky > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 20:46

I know that stretch of road all too well from living in Southeast Texas and heading to Baton Rouge/New Orleans fairly regularly for a couple of years. There were always Border Patrol Tahoes in both the east and west side of Lake Charles on I-10.

Even more impressive was between Lake Charles and Lafayette where I-10 is flat and almost completely straight. Highway patrol just sits on the side of the highway on the rear of the car holding the radar. And you still won’t see them until you’re right up on them!

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 20:48

Lucky. When I’m paying attention, I like to have another car be my pilot fish. If I can find a guy that wants to speed, I kinda pace in back of him to let him hit any troopers before I get there.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove
05/24/2018 at 20:53

Pilot fish. Huh. I usually call them my rabbit.

These days, I’m usually the rabbit.

TheRealBicycleBuck > TechJunky
05/24/2018 at 20:54

I know where most of those guys hide. The state trooper hiding with the border patrol guys was a first for me.

TheRealBicycleBuck > TheD0k_2many toys 2little time
05/24/2018 at 20:56

While I’d LOVE to get a new bike, I still wouldn’t use it for my weekly commute to Houston. It’s too hard to carry full-sized luggage. I’d have to get one of those little trailers to drag behind me.

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 21:14

That’s not good. You’ll end up Hasenpfeffer.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove
05/24/2018 at 21:20

I’ve never seen that word in writing before, but once I saw it, I knew EXACTLY what you were talking about. Who says cartoons don’t teach you anything?

gogmorgo - rowing gears in a Grand Cherokee > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 21:33

I also had a weird cop-car related incident today that made me go a bit WTF. I just changed a wheel bearing in an RCMP ppv Tahoe (I still don’t know why they trust me with that sort of thing, TBH) which was... Well it was pretty bad:

But back on track with the story, I was test driving it, out on the highway, and some dickhead in non-descript crossover who’d been tailgating me hard for a while (at 10% over the limit) pulled out to pass across a double yellow, and made both myself and oncoming traffic stand on the brakes to avoid a collision. Who the fuck does that to a cop car? Sure it was unmarked, but from the rear with the slammed stance, cage in the back, lights in the bumper and window, and way too many antennas on the roof, it’s super obvious it’s a cop car. It’s not like he hadn’t been close enough to see all that stuff for a solid ten minutes before he pulled that move.

I very nearly hit the blues and two when he actually pulled out... but I kinda like my job.

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/24/2018 at 21:41

Precisely. Mel Blanc should have won a Nobel.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove
05/24/2018 at 21:56

He’d probably have better luck getting an Ig Nobel .

DipodomysDeserti > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/25/2018 at 07:32

Had a couple of oh shit moments with cops along the I10 between Phoenix and Tucson yesterday. As long as the border gestapo don’t hear my kids speaking Spanish I don’t have to worry about them pulling me over.

Chariotoflove > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/25/2018 at 09:46

He’s way too smart to earn that.

I love reading about those. My favorite is still the birthing centrifuge.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Chariotoflove
05/25/2018 at 11:05

On the contrary, I think he’s smart enough to earn an Ig Nobel. Most of those projects were put together with this award in mind!

TheRealBicycleBuck > DipodomysDeserti
05/25/2018 at 11:13

My kids are hybrids, but they took on more of my English/Irish/French heritage than her hispanic . Sometimes I worry when my wife goes with the kids to her parents’ place in south Texas. She has to pass through a checkpoint. I always wonder what the agents are thinking when a hispanic woman pulls up with two apparently white kids in the back of the car.

DipodomysDeserti > TheRealBicycleBuck
05/25/2018 at 12:20

The ignorant ones will probably be suspicious not knowing there are lots of white hispanic people in the world.