Trail Rated

"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch)
05/24/2018 at 11:36 • Filed to: Joop

Remember that time Jeep tried to convince people, with a straight face, that the Compass trailhawk was a compitent off road vehicle?

I particularly like 1:03 where they talk about “climb[ing] over that rock smoothly” when the visual is a hard bump with some wheel air time and a cut before showing that it didn’t...actually...make it up the hill.

Also at :45 here where you get into a lot of articulation. Not shown: that.

Also that it just ends abruptl

So in case you were wondering what “trail rated” means I spent some time looking into it instead of sleep and I have discovered that it IS actually a thing. In that a test center contracted by FCA called the NATC (nevada automotive test center) “certifies” certain models of Jeep that pass a set of 5 criteria in the following categories:

Traction - Does it have some?

Water Fording - Can it get a little wet?

Maneuverability - Does the steering wheel function?

Articulation - Does it have springs?

Ground clearance - Are those springs not failed?

If it passes this rigorous independent testing its certified “trail rated”

Hyperbole aside I like the looks of the compass, I like that they tried...especially in this segment...and I like that it probably IS the best off roader in its class but I think we can all agree this silly, even for Jeep.

DISCUSSION (31)

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 11:42

Being the best off road in its class isn’t saying very much, but I guess “in the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king”. Also they were talking about skid plates but at 0.33 in the first video you can see the rear differential completely exposed. That’s just begging to get ripped open.

Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 11:42

i looks a lot better than the old compass thats for sure

HammerheadFistpunch > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts.
05/24/2018 at 11:44

Yup. I mean i guess its unfair to heap expectations on something that is only tangentially capable of those things by nature but its likewise unfair to pretend it is actually capable of those things.

HammerheadFistpunch > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero
05/24/2018 at 11:44

truth.

404 - User No Longer Available > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 11:47

The only thing it actually needs to climb up is a curb at the local mall in order not to curbrash the wheels.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 11:49

Are the Compass and “Cherokee” on the same Fiat platform?

HammerheadFistpunch > 404 - User No Longer Available
05/24/2018 at 11:49

which is why they gave it those deeply dished wheels...

HammerheadFistpunch > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
05/24/2018 at 11:54

compass and renegade are, The small wide platform. the cherokee in on the compact US wide one with the dart

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 11:55

True, but isn’t Jeep inviting those comparisons with these marketing videos? Also I found out that the brother of one of my wifes high school friends is a Jeep designer (worked on the Renegade), man I’d love to be able to pick his brain one day.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 11:57

Coming to rental car lots near you.

LOREM IPSUM > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 12:00

Just badge it as a Dodge. Problem solved.

Future next gen S2000 owner > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 12:01

When can I see some lifted Darts running around Moab?

HammerheadFistpunch > Future next gen S2000 owner
05/24/2018 at 12:04

Kinja'd!!!

Dubblewhopper > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 12:04

I miss the Comanche. Jeep should bring that back instead of the Scrambler.

HammerheadFistpunch > Dubblewhopper
05/24/2018 at 12:06

And the XJ instead of the KL...but its the world we’ve got.

random001 > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 12:07

Probably gets beaten by the Crosstrek in the class, though...

Future next gen S2000 owner > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 12:17

Well played, good sir.

DC3 LS, will be perpetually replacing cars until the end of time > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 12:59

I wanna watch the video, but then I don’t want to have my YT recommendations spammed with FCA PR crap :(

1st world problems.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 13:02

“Skid plates are meant to be used” shows angle of exposed, and tiny rear diff.

HammerheadFistpunch > DC3 LS, will be perpetually replacing cars until the end of time
05/24/2018 at 13:12

you can delete videos in your watch history. I found it it works for keeping them off the algorythmatron

mr2gud2u > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 13:21

I’m far from a seasoned wheeler, but without at least a front or rear straight axle you are at a disadvantage. Sure, I bet you will be able to handle most beginner trails, but any moderate obstacles will be out of the question.

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > DC3 LS, will be perpetually replacing cars until the end of time
05/24/2018 at 13:41

Launch YouTube in an incognito browser.

shop-teacher > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 13:49

This surprises me .... not at all.

adamftw > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 14:06

I feel like all modern soft-roaders with BATC and a competent driver with enough cajones can do most of this shit. Although that one IG clip of the new Cherokee hitting some hill somewhere desert-y was pretty impressive.

HammerheadFistpunch > adamftw
05/24/2018 at 14:09

I don’t that one, I’ll have to hunt fer it.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 14:48

Heritage Trail Rated.

http://www.heritagetrailmall.com/

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > HammerheadFistpunch
05/24/2018 at 15:28

I’m fairly certain my Monster is at least as capable off road as this stupid thing.

adamftw > HammerheadFistpunch
05/25/2018 at 06:39

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

HammerheadFistpunch > adamftw
05/25/2018 at 09:38

At first I was like “hey that’s pretty impressive!”

Then i read the text and shook my head

adamftw > HammerheadFistpunch
05/25/2018 at 10:13

LOL. I love that page, they post some pretty funny stuff.

Stef Schrader > HammerheadFistpunch
05/25/2018 at 15:23

LOL same