Your %DV of First World Problems

"Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer" (smallbear94)
02/16/2018 at 12:25 • Filed to: None

Because it’s a moderately slow Friday and I feel like complaining about trivial BS to kill time. Some are automotive related. Some are not.

Chicken or egg scenario—which did I notice first, the Colorado or the sticker?

- Washer fluid bottles. This is a three-parter. Is there a law that says they have to be awkwardly placed? On those with the flip-top cap, why is there no way to hold the cap open? We HAVE the technology. Why do automakers persist in making washer bottles that will not swallow the entire jug?

- People who send pictures in the body of emails. Inevitably the quality is shit and the image is sideways or upside down. Have to jump through all kinds of hoops to do what should be a 1-step process. Stahp

- I have a special hatred for people who !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . At least, for people who I can SEE pull that crap. I’ve said before, I really don’t give a damn what you do on the road as long as it affects only yourself... but these guys are asswipes. Deciding to make your movements unpredictable, in traffic, with no way out if things go wrong... yeah, go head-butt a barrier. I encourage it.

- People who brake for flashing pedestrian signals. Especially those who use the countdown type to stop at the line just as the light turns yellow. FYI, the guy in behind is now fighting the urge not to push you into the intersection to get t-boned by a bus. Kindly. Keep. Going. The pedestrian signal is not for you.

- “Merge” does not mean “yield” unless there is literally no other choice.

- Related to the last point, people who brake to change lanes. There are some circumstances where I’m OK with it, if there are no options ahead and there’s nobody behind to obstruct, but most of the time that doesn’t apply. WRONG PEDAL

- WHY do people do !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . The only people you fool are the ones that don’t care.

- People who turn into the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! lane possible, and refuse to accelerate to avoid traffic that was already there. !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

- *Ring ring* I just called to let you know I sent you an email. Uh, yeah? It comes through whether you call or not. If I haven’t had time to get to it, calling and interrupting what I was doing isn’t going to speed me up.

That’s all for now folks. Have a good day. Obligatory Leafs spam:

Hello old guy, you seem fun :)

DISCUSSION (18)

Ash78, voting early and often > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 12:29

Pictures in the body of emails are the work of the devil. However, I recently learned that this is usually dictated by the RECEIVING email server, not the sender. D’oh. So much misplaced hatred for so many years.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Ash78, voting early and often
02/16/2018 at 12:33

That’s weird, because I receive them both ways. Sometimes from the same people.

fintail > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 12:53

What’s really grinding my gears lately is crappy dual turn lane skill, and the sad souls who don’t turn into the nearest lane when required. The lack of signaling is also getting to me, and I feel blessed our enforcement heroes are doing so much more than speed enforcement.

I’m all for a good hockey fight between willing participants who more or less exist for the task, but I’d rather not return to the bad old ugly days of the 70s.

VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 12:56

my .015c (adjusted for inflation)

- Washer fluid bottles. - cost. I feel like functionality enhancements should be a trim package, but it’d never sell.

- People who send pictures in the body of emails. - to further complicate this, some mail clients try to anticipate nonexistent needs and with auto open identified image hyperlinks or attached images. Some client configs allow you to adjust this.

- I have a special hatred for people who pull this crap . - They’re fucking dumb and I hate them.

- People who brake for flashing pedestrian signals - poor training and poor decision making skills, still sucks

- “Merge” does not mean “yield” - nobody in my part of town knows what merge means either.

- WHY do people do this - cause kids aren’t the only ones who play pretend. Tacky as hell.

- People who turn into the furthest lane possible, - horrible

- *Ring ring* I just called to let you know I sent you an email. - When I was primarily in an office, I was tempted to grab a telecom guy and ask him to put an IVR in front of my extension. That shit needs to end.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > fintail
02/16/2018 at 13:54

- Guys stepping up for their teammate is great. Until it’s for a relatively minor, clean hit.

- Line brawls are dumb though the odd one can be amusing.

- Hits however need to stay at all costs. Please?

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely
02/16/2018 at 14:00

- The placement is one thing, the other two could be solved with $0.25 of extra plastic. As far as selling, try me. What are you going to give me and what’s it going to cost?

- Blech.

- This is both true and sadly the reason that makes the most sense.

- Should’ve done it.

VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 14:10

Re: selling - while I’m sure us two would be sold (and probably several opponauts) anyone at GM or whoever running the numbers probably don’t want to retool their assembly lineup for a featureset that 20 people a year will buy. Or divert an engineer to spend 200 labor hours redesigning a 20 cent part for 30 minutes and spend the rest of his month trying to get the design approved and integrated into the lineup by management.

But I’d happily spend a extra 500 or whatever for better flip top lid designs, volume knobs independent of touch screens, better working less thread-strippable magnetic reservoir drain plugs, and less one-time-use breakaway plastic pegs in my car. Or just a way to access the stereo head unit that doesn’t mean ruining the OEM look. You know, practical stuff.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely
02/16/2018 at 14:17

Heck, I’d throw them an extra $100 just to have the washer bottle designed properly.

You’re right about not retooling, but it’s hard to imagine it costing them anything extra to just implement the feature from the start.

fintail > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 14:20

I often think clearer boundaries need to be defined for a “clean” hit (and more consistent rule enforcement, which as we all know is a pipe dream). Is a hit strategic, or intent to injure? Is malice intended to be part of the game? I definitely don’t want a no checking or no fighting league, but I also don’t want a return to the days of POS ankle breaking hack Clarke and friends.

VajazzleMcDildertits - read carefully, respond politely > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 14:21

I figure this is why things like additional fluid cooling equipment show up on later years of the same models, and subsequent generations adopt repackaging and redesign of previous years, but I wonder what it’s like in those beancounter meetings when they decide what to skimp on and what not to. Or if they even have meetings for washer bottles.

The people/techs/mechanics who work on these cars nonstop probably have opinions about what designs are servicable in the wild vs not. I wonder if their design feedback ever goes back upstairs to HQ.

Long-Voyager > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 16:02

-People who turn into the furthest lane.

-Bested by people who have to pull out directly in front of you, putz their way up to about 35mph (on a 55mph road), only to turn left at the next road, while there is NO ONE BEHIND YOU FOR MILES!

-People who do the above to trucks with trailers behind them.

-People who move into the space you were leaving for a stopping area when towing.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Long-Voyager
02/16/2018 at 16:11

FUCK YOU I’M A TRUCK

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/16/2018 at 22:19

Old time hockey!

i put the image in the body of an email for one client as he never.. NEVER opens the fucking attachments. Followed by a reply to me and my boss “you never sent the ___”

Long-Voyager > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/19/2018 at 07:40

Go for a ride with someone who’s towing something once, you may see why many truckers have begun living by this theory:

Kinja'd!!!

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Long-Voyager
02/20/2018 at 08:16

Have done, have towed myself, still see no reason for it. The fact that some people seem unaware of the extra long thing behind them once they’ve finished hitching up is no reason to do whatever the fuck you want when you’re put in that position.

Long-Voyager > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/20/2018 at 10:13

I agree, some people shouldn’t be towing.

Likewise, other drivers need to be less reckless around vehicles that are towing.

People drop into my space left for braking, people jamming in next to me when I have started merging, people pulling out in front when there is no reason for it, etc. Things like these make a person towing care less and less about your “rights” when they happen every single time.

It’s a 2-way street. I try to be courteous to those around me, but when those around me endanger my safety because of their impatience/stupidity, you can bet your ass I’ll be going on the offensive.

xyzabc > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
02/20/2018 at 17:27

Maple Leafs are Burgundy, not Blue...

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > xyzabc
02/20/2018 at 21:48

Maple Leafs are blue, Team Canada’s Maple Leaves are burgundy, maple leaves are green