SINGLES AWARENESS WEEK: CAR-STYLE

"K-Roll-PorscheTamer" (k-roll390) 02/12/2018 at 18:31 • Filed to: What am I doing?

10

32

“Valentine’s Day” is a shitty Macy’s/Hallmark holiday. But worry not! Every day this week, K-Roll is gonna show you how much money you can save/spend instead of thinking about how much you despise your perceived ForeverAloneness, or try to. Today, let’s see what you can buy if you don’t have a wedding!

The interwebz tells me the highest average cost of a wedding in the US is about between $19k-35k. That’s an assload of money to stand in front of people you may not know, but they all know damn well you’re gonna hit the Tail of the Dragon that night. So what cars could you put in your garage instead?

If you want something new down low, $19k will get you into a basic Honda Civic Coupe. $35k up high will get you into whatever pony car you want with the wrong engine, or a base Mustang GT.

But I’m not you! What else could you get within the cost of an absurdly expensive prelude to “bow chika wow wow”??

Or maybe I won’t do this every day. I’m not sure why I even did this. And I don’t care! I think?

AestheticsInMotion > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 19:02

1

I have to imagine most people regret spending that money the day after, right..?

Okay I’ll play. 19k low would get me a great condition fairly low mileage s2000. Yes please. Preferably yellow with black interior. Blue over blue would be second pick.

35k high... Uhm. Is it still possible to find anNSX for that? If so, NSX all the way. If not.... Import a rhd FD rx7 and buy a cheap bike. Use the rest of the money for an epic trip

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 19:02

6

Personally I think anyone who drops that kind of coin on a wedding is either wealthy or crazy. You could buy a heck of honeymoon and use the rest on a down payment for a home. Or like 2 really fun cars. Or 35 Paseos.

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/12/2018 at 19:03

1

Or 35 really fun cars*

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 02/12/2018 at 19:07

0

Or you could do nothing. Or buy all the booze and share it with no one! Put a moat around your house and incur all the legal fees.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 19:08

0

That sounds not so bad.

SPAMBot - Horse Doctor > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 19:17

0

On the low end, I’d pay for another engine out service and an exhaust *nervous laughing*

On the high end, I’d buy an XF supercharged and a warranty.

It’s really crazy how much couples spend on weddings. A friend of mine married up and her parents gave the a $50k (!!) budget. The wedding was awesome, but I would still rather have one of the GT350's on Carmax.

daender > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 19:53

0

I’m sorry, but it’d be tough for me to marry someone who wants a $20,000+ wedding unless their rich family is paying for it. $20,000 that could’ve gone to buying her a nicer vehicle, honeymoon, and/or home.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 19:58

1

LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 20:16

1

I only hope that there is someone out there who reads this and says, “You are sure that I won’t drive the Tail of the Dragon on my wedding night?

“Challenge accepted!”

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com 02/12/2018 at 20:38

1

You’re assuming someone out there who’s having a wedding will read this.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 02/12/2018 at 20:45

1

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > daender 02/12/2018 at 20:47

0

Or a lot of model rockets.

Frenchlicker > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 20:47

0

I want a snazzy wedding but there is no way we will spend anywhere near that amount. Before we want to get married there is a plan to buy a new Wrangler or van, maybe a house and possibly a child. Upside is we will have her car paid off and both be paying for a Jeep we love.

Ssfancyfresh > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 20:52

0

I wish I had the dollars I spent on my wedding back. I’d have a nice 996 Turbo S. Or a lot of used Audi TT’s. Or, like, so many things.

So dumb.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Frenchlicker 02/12/2018 at 20:55

1

THIS IS NOT FOR YOU!!

Now I have words to take back...

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Ssfancyfresh 02/12/2018 at 20:55

0

How much did you waste?

LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 21:12

0

Just hoping.

Frenchlicker > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 21:16

1

Hey just saying, if you fuck up and find someone that shares an interest you may have two paychecks to buy a car. Or one that covers a large chunk of bills that allows you to buy car stuff. To each their own.

I could afford a 50% downpayment on that JL and the build for my XJ for the top end wedding.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Frenchlicker 02/12/2018 at 21:22

1

I was referring to a comment where I said no one having a wedding would read this. Then you showed up. :p

Ssfancyfresh > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 21:27

0

My half was $40k

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Ssfancyfresh 02/12/2018 at 21:37

1

I have no words to form into a reasonable comment for you on this. Was it worth it.

wafflesnfalafel > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 21:45

0

I love my wife very much, she is a smart, funny, beautiful woman, but there are many days I get much more pleasure and satisfaction from my WRX...

yamahog > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 21:48

1

thanks buddy, just rub it in _ lol

how tf did I find the one straight guy who wants a big wedding so badly that he agreed to do the all the planning

also for everyone asking how you afford it - two years of bonuses from handsomely compensated jobs and monthly contributions to a dedicated wedding savings account (so yea, basically be making enough to not miss that money). fwiw my parents haven’t offered shit but his gave us the same amount they gave his sister for her wedding in the form of a generous cash contribution that’ll cover most of our honeymoon. Yes, we already bought a house, no family assistance on that, we already have 5 cars and a motorcycle, and not having any kids definitely helps.  

Ssfancyfresh > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 21:56

0

It was a dope fucking party. Yeah. But now I’m a bit older and I’ve got some kiddos. That cash would come in handy.

If you do have a wedding and money is tight, it is 100% worth it to splurge for a good live band. Everything else is just bullshit.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Ssfancyfresh 02/12/2018 at 22:57

0

I’m 22 and head of the officially not official Oppositelock Singles Awareness Association (OSAA). A wedding is no concern of mein at the moment.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > yamahog 02/12/2018 at 22:59

0

Wait, what am I rubbing in? You’re doing me a confusion...

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > AestheticsInMotion 02/12/2018 at 22:59

0

Using your money smart, I approve.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > wafflesnfalafel 02/12/2018 at 23:00

1

I love my.....I get pleasure from my Mustang and Porsche...

AestheticsInMotion > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/12/2018 at 23:17

0

Wait. I desperately need a 944 turbo in my life. I might have to shuffle the numbers around a bit...

Speaking of which, how’s your Porsche coming along?

Frenchlicker > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/13/2018 at 01:09

0

I see. If it helps mine is very far off relatively(2020).

yamahog > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/13/2018 at 20:59

1

all the stuff I could be paying for instead of this wedding XD

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > yamahog 02/13/2018 at 21:08

0

“Oh Well” ¯\_()_/¯