Oh no baby, what is you doin'?

Kinja'd!!! "If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee)
12/17/2018 at 14:03 • Filed to: None

Kinja'd!!!1 Kinja'd!!! 27
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Anyone know a way to scan 20-pin BMW body codes that doesn’t involve a $2,000 scantool?


DISCUSSION (27)


Kinja'd!!! Shift24 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 14:12

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Did you just have a could snap? It was above freezing by 5-10F then (maybe with rain) it dropped below 32?

Reason being is I have old cars that do this, mainly my k1500 but infrequently my e39 does this.


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Shift24
12/17/2018 at 14:16

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The opposite, it’s been at or below freezing lately but  the last 4 days have been in the 40's.


Kinja'd!!! JMordu becoming “savethemilanos” > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 14:20

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There are pretty reasonable 20 pin to obd2 adapter cables. T hen get an obd2 to usb cable, ideally one that’s like “k dcan for inpa” or whatever (been a while since I had any bmws). Bootleg bmw tools/inpa/whatever software was never very hard to find and suddenly any laptop is a full service bmw computer for any car older than the date of your bootleg software . I did things like reprogram the dme for new  direct injectors in my e92 without much trouble so can’t be hard to figure out why you’ve got that light. 


Kinja'd!!! TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 14:23

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I have a really good scan tool that does SRS on BMW


Kinja'd!!! HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 14:24

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Thats OBD2 right? I bought a bluetooth OBD2 dongle and it works. Altho I’ve heard from other BMW owners that Carly has more features.

https://www.amazon.com/Original-Carly-Adapter-Generation-Iphone/dp/B00X3UYXM0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1545074533&sr=8-1&keywords=carly

this is the one I got.   https://www.amazon.com/BlueDriver-Bluetooth-Professional-iPhone-Android/dp/B00652G4TS/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?ie=UTF8&qid=1545074605&sr=8-1-spons&keywords=carly+obd2&psc=1


Kinja'd!!! TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo > TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo
12/17/2018 at 14:24

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my shop, 68 Holmes Hole rd in VH


Kinja'd!!! Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 14:35

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I have an iCarSoft one for my Land Rover.  It isn’t my favorite, but at around $100 it does read codes from the all the “other” sources (ABS, SRS, transmission, etc).  They likely make one for your BMW.


Kinja'd!!! 404 - User No Longer Available > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 14:47

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If you can’t scan it... think state safety can? Just disconnect the light, problem solved.

(I’m just kidding, don’t do it)


Kinja'd!!! PatBateman > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 15:05

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It’s giving you fair warning that it (the car) has decided to kill you via random airbag deployment.

It was nice knowing you RIP thoughts and prayers. 


Kinja'd!!! Shift24 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 16:16

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Weird and there are ways around using a $2000 scan tool. I looked up ECS and they have a tool that can connect to BMWs 20 pin connector

One with reviews talking about air bag light

https://www.ecstuning.com/b-schwaben-by-foxwell-parts/professional-bmw-mini-scan-tool/014020sch01a~scf/?gclid=Cj0KCQiAr93gBRDSARIsADvHiOpB3Hr2O5OCFYaujtT1NneLITlgOBz3b31oy-vTMBJ-Xi_8e2G0dewaAkv8EALw_wcB

One with 20 pin ~$140

https://www.ecstuning.com/b-schwaben-by-foxwell-parts/professional-bmw-scan-tool-with-20-pin-adapter-cable/014020sch01e36kt/?gclid=Cj0KCQiAr93gBRDSARIsADvHiOpGo0lvlUCpMhNKh431zIA7uiTNW9Wx9vhcazyj5b3aqa8QyKyzLisaArPNEALw_wcB


Kinja'd!!! Svend > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 16:41

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The car is telling you, you work too hard and should take a holiday and sit on a lounger somewhere sunny. 


Kinja'd!!! I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 17:20

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Meh. Just take the airbag out if you’re worried about random deployment. If the car is older than maybe 10 years, the airbag is probably expired and would cause more injury than it would likely prevent. Did you know there’s a maintenance interval for airbag replacement? There is, apparently.


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Shift24
12/17/2018 at 17:31

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But will a normal scantool connected to an adapter even be able to read body codes, is my question I guess.


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo
12/17/2018 at 17:32

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Don't have any time for the next few days. Are you there every day?


Kinja'd!!! Tapas > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 17:36

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Start dating someone who works in the dealership?


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Tapas
12/17/2018 at 18:17

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Long story but I may have an in with someone at the Ferrari factory...


Kinja'd!!! Tapas > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 18:59

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Sweet! I’ll let you know when I can afford to buy one with an employee discount! That will be maybe in 30ish years...maybe


Kinja'd!!! TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 19:01

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I’m here every day, just worked on a 01’ 540i 6MT last week but usualy it’s just trucks I see 


Kinja'd!!! Shift24 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 19:10

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Wh y do you need it to read body codes if it leads to the right errors ? Also I feel this is more than some basic scan tool. That list of capabilities is impressive.


Kinja'd!!! Brickman > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/17/2018 at 19:17

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Well the light is telling you to carry a large beachball in front of you.


Kinja'd!!! pip bip - choose Corrour > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/18/2018 at 07:34

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just burn it


Kinja'd!!! SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/18/2018 at 09:16

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You need the Peake R5 SRS tool for bmw

https://www.autohausaz.com/pn/R5SRS-16?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=frooglePN&utm_term=R5SRS-16&gclid=CjwKCAiA0uLgBRABEiwAecFnk01jU5zR95JZD4Wcjhfry12DapbMn1-qtWklkXD2o_C2XiTny3Mt3BoC0oMQAvD_BwE


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo
12/18/2018 at 14:44

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I think I’ll swing by t omorrow on my luch


Kinja'd!!! TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/19/2018 at 08:49

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I take lunch here so I’ll be around, got road calls all this morning though. 


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo
12/19/2018 at 13:23

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Ok. It was Kyle, right? I'm shit with names.


Kinja'd!!! TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
12/19/2018 at 14:26

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No worries it’s Doug, I was back at the shop and for my lunch break but had to go back on the road, I had left a note on the door for you with my contact. I sorry if you missed me, my boss sprained his knee yesterday and I’m usually never on road calls this much. 


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > TFSIVTEC drivesavolvo
12/19/2018 at 16:56

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I didn't even make it by lol