Be sure to vaccinate your Fords. 

"Spanfeller is a twat" (theaspiringengineer) 11/29/2018 at 15:24 • Filed to: BUILT FERD KILLER., TINY DICKS

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We thought that the “Killer Ford” virus had been eradicated from earth in the 80s but a recent anti-vaxxer, pro-vaper trend in the US (amongst C&C communities) has put Fords back at risk of catching this deadly virus.

The virus causes a mutation of the peacocking gene found in common Fords meant to attract so-called “babes”. Normally this gene only makes the driver stick to 1st gear until 5000rpm and try to race every mildly-sporty car they see.

Rather than those, mostly, safe idiotic acts, the mutated gene makes the AC throw “lil dic” pheromones into the cabin, disables traction control and locks up the rear end. Very dangerous for both the patient and the people around them.

Normally I wouldn’t care, because it normally sticks to Ford Mustangs in the US, but yesterday a case of “Killer Ford” occurred in Mexico City, when an F150, intentionally, tried to run over a cyclist... in reverse. Instead they crashed into two parked cars and injured 5 people! None of which were the original cyclist this psychopath was after.

Thankfully, the driver was caught, and arrested. 

Stay safe.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 15:40

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Of the people at work I know that drive, or have driven, Fords in the last 2 years, 3/5  of those cars are now dead. 2 of those were mustangs.

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 15:42

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*pro tip* aproach cyclists from behind... they cant see you there and wont do annoying stuff like dodge

alternatively dont be a raging asshole

Spanfeller is a twat > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 11/29/2018 at 15:42

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I’m just becoming so much more wa ry of being a cyclist here... just two days ago some asshole in a Macan skipped a light and almost ran me over and almost  t-boned three other cars. 

Spanfeller is a twat > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 11/29/2018 at 15:43

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I honestly would be petrified if a light duty truck wanted to run me over for “some" reason. 

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 15:45

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i just call it traffic..... never had anyone actually aim for me tho... they just do that shit accidentally.... and usually not in reverse

but yeah... if someone did i sure as hell wouldnt stick around for the aftermath

boredalways > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 15:46

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Please tell me that the Ferd driver was arrested and is still sitting in jail?

Spanfeller is a twat > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 11/29/2018 at 15:46

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Someone did try to make me fall. They were angry I was overtaking them. But other than that one incident, It’s been smooth riding...   

Spanfeller is a twat > boredalways 11/29/2018 at 15:48

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I do think he will be sitting in jail for a long time, running a cyclist over is a special kind of crime here... since so many people record them, getting away with it is virtually impossible. 

One of the people he injured was hit in the head with the bumper and he’s in Hospital. 

dogisbadob > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 15:55

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That Spark is Built Ford Tuff :p

Spanfeller is a twat > dogisbadob 11/29/2018 at 15:57

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there’s another car infront of  the spark

Spaceball-Two > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 15:59

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Oh no! I think I’m infected!

Spanfeller is a twat > Spaceball-Two 11/29/2018 at 16:02

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Sometimes you just have to let them go for your own safety.

WHY AM I STILL CRYING THIS MOVIE IS LIKE TEN YEARS OLD.

jimz > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 16:04

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too many times I’ve seen someone road raeg and intentionally swerve towards the car of whoever they were pissed off at.  I don’t get it.  

Spanfeller is a twat > jimz 11/29/2018 at 16:09

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Like, I’ve road raged...I swear or I stick my car too close or whatever....


But what kind of jackass would put their truck in reverse and chase a cyclist that is literally running away and clinging to dear life? It seems like the kind of person that shouldn't be allowed to have a license in the first place.

Spaceball-Two > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 16:52

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Ah man why’d you have to go and do that! 

wafflesnfalafel > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 17:09

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something, something, should have used protection

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Spanfeller is a twat 11/29/2018 at 17:26

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This is one of the reasons I don’t bicycle commute. Too dangerous. At least on a motorcycle I can get away.

The other reason is laziness.