Turkey day advice

"KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time" (kngt)
11/21/2018 at 21:45 • Filed to: shitpost, shitposting, Thanksgiving

@ObviousPlant

DISCUSSION (18)

Kiltedpadre > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 21:59

6 and 8 both sound fantastic!

No mention of booze? Perhaps the racist uncle can be replaced with an old fashioned cocktail fountain?

WilliamsSW > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:02

They forgot “ drink heavily tonight. And the hair of the dog that bit you is your best friend tomorrow"

AestheticsInMotion > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:05

Or my favorite, leave early

wafflesnfalafel > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:11

#9 - go for a long drive in a fast car...

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:11

I’m avoiding this by not going to a family function, and spending the day in peace and quiet with my dog.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:15

My cousins girlfriend developed a severe allergic reaction after dinner, had to take her to the ER-she was also quite drunk . Needless to say leaving early was pretty easy!

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
11/21/2018 at 22:19

Pretty sure I’ve seen this scene play out in a sitcom/movie.

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > Kiltedpadre
11/21/2018 at 22:20

Booze is #0, pregaming before Thanksgiving

WilliamsSW > Kiltedpadre
11/21/2018 at 22:22

Alcohol is what makes the racist uncle shine

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:25

Seriously she knew she had a severe allergy to dogs and my cousin’s mom has two malamutes! So she got some heavy duty drugs and forgot to take them because too drunk. Good times.

shop-teacher > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:31

I'll take #4 and #8 for about 10 pounds, Alex.

Chariotoflove > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:42

What if my family doesn’t even want me around? Is there a list for that ?

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > Chariotoflove
11/21/2018 at 22:45

This is why one needs dogs.

Chariotoflove > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 22:46

I miss having a dog.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/21/2018 at 23:09

1. Bring a large bottle of Rye Whiskey

2. Down a shot and say “HILLARY CLINTON WAS RIGHT!”

3. Start talking about the problems with blacks, Asians, liberals, conservatives, Muslims, Christians, Jews, Mexicans, Canadians, Quebecers and Albanians.

4. Declare that kids need more corporal punishment and that pie is for gays.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Future Heap Owner > Chariotoflove
11/22/2018 at 02:36

PS9 > KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time
11/22/2018 at 03:08

What if your racist uncle became President? It would be hard to avoid talking about him. Or to him if he were there.

KingT- 60% of the time, it works every time > PS9
11/22/2018 at 08:11

I mean you could totally become his favorite nephew if you ignored everything else just talked about his two fav countries-Russia and Saudi Arabia. Might just give you a position on the administration.