im having a good time

"Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To" (murdersofa)
11/16/2018 at 00:38 • Filed to: None

pardon typing I’m increasingly fucking drunk. So this mazda6 I bought for my wife. Got it from a buddy in texas who has been daily driving it since he picked it up in january or some shit like that. Good guy. I trust him. I hitch a ride down to texas to pick it up and he shows up that evening awkward like “uh so I lent it to a friend who really needed a car and said he could drive clutch but he burned the shit out of the clutch now it slips. I’ll take $500 off if you want” cool that makes the car $1500 for a decent condition 2003 Mazda6 V6 Manual that’s a pretty good deal. So I buy the car and road trip it back to Kansas. Get home at 1am and it’s 40 degrees and raining so I tell the wife to take the lexus to work so I can take the mazda because i know how to baby the clutch without totally roasting the rest of it. Then the lexus gets totaled because of that decision and you know that story. So the mazda needs a cluthc and wheel bearings and my friend offers to do it for $60 an hour. He tore into it tonight now that I got the parts from rockauto and found a TON of janky shit. Cross threaded random hardware store bolts, etc. Then he finally after like 4 fucking hours gets to the clutch and lo and behold the goddamn cluthc I bought from fucking rock auto is the wrong size fo the fucking car. Car can’t sit on his lift for a week while I order a new one so now I have to buy a clutch locally at massivelky infated local fucking prices and in the meantime also buy back my Lexus for $470 so my fucking car isn’t taken from me

im having a good time and there’s plenty of vodka left i may go to work tomorrow i may just sleep till noon in a drunken goddmn haze who even fucking knows at this point i’m honestly shocked i nknow what a keyboard is righ tnowe

DISCUSSION (26)

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 00:49

welp.. if bad shit comes in threes... you should be okiday from here on

aside from the hangover

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > farscythe - makin da cawfee!
11/16/2018 at 00:53

i’m 22 wtf is a hangovefr

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 00:55

Oh dear. You paid $1700 or that Mazda? That should have been a red flag for me right there...

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 00:57

lol fair dinkum :)

have at it

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
11/16/2018 at 00:57

$1500 from a friend. It was $2000 originally then when I got down there he took $500 because clutch. He comes from a very rich family and buys and sells super cheap cars as a hobby to help fund his many side projects (high boost NB miata for himself, NA/NB hybrid for his mom, high-boost MR2 SW20 for his dad). I have no doubt he knew about none of this and was just looking to break even on a perfectly fine daily he didn’t really need any more due to being able to borrow his parents raptor/m3/whatever whenver he wnatrs.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 00:58

took $500 off*

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 01:03

It’s what happens when you turn 23

Steve in Manhattan > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 01:05

Call in sick tomorrow. And from now on “friend” appears exactly that way in print.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles
11/16/2018 at 01:05

oh cool so i have another two months well bottoms up lads

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Steve in Manhattan
11/16/2018 at 01:10

got a shitload to do I’ve been way too distracted at work with this shit haven’t gotten a damn thing done this week

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 01:11

I’m just saying, you can’t find a Mazda6 that cheap with that low miles, even PRE-discount . It’s not a shot at your friend, it's a shot at the car. It’s more like, “Hmm, I guess a 1992 Camry LE will have to do.”

Deal Killer - Powered by Focus > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 01:19

User name appears to check out. I have a bud left and some decent bourbon.

Bman76 (hates WS6 hoods, is on his phone and has 4 burners now) > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
11/16/2018 at 01:21

Jake is red/green colorblind when it comes to cars, so red flags are often mistaken for greens.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
11/16/2018 at 01:24

I’ve bought ‘86 mustangs for $800 in running shape, a ‘97 Riviera for $650 and immediately road tripped it to ohio for a $1 nissan sentra se-r

my idea of what shit is worth is severley skewed and I’d hoped that now, when I need it, I’d get such luck again but i guess not

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 01:31

Right but — all of those cars you named, you no longer own... Why is that? And h ow would they have held up had you kept them for a normal ownership span? You’re 22 so I’m guessing you had none for terribly long...

I feel bad for you. I really do. My wife has listened to me rehash the chronology of your misfortunes, and she is married to a man who has bought six sub-$2k cars over four years. Only one remains...

Steve in Manhattan > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 01:50

If you think you can get something done and appear fine while doing it, go in. Last week I took a day because I re-injured my back (old horseback riding injury) ... could have made it in, but I would have been howling in pain every time I used my spine.

AestheticsInMotion > themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles
11/16/2018 at 01:51

Am 23. Can confirm :(

pip bip - choose Corrour > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 03:49

look on the bright side, things can only get better

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 05:09

I'm all for drinking. After all I'm about to pour myself a Black Russian...but toasting one's misfortune to the point of utter sozzlement in spite of all other commitments is foolish and pointless. But as you point out, you are only 22 so you have a couple of decades yet to make good.

DipodomysDeserti > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 07:20

Check Amazonfor the clutch. I just ordered brake hardware for my Jeep and everything cost about half of what it would from a an autoparts store. Got free next day delivery on everything.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > pip bip - choose Corrour
11/16/2018 at 08:30

title card: “and then they did”

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Steve in Manhattan
11/16/2018 at 08:30

Just don’t use your spine then. Simple solution. Gotta be a problem solver. Synergy.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
11/16/2018 at 08:31

“chronology of misfortune” would be a great band name

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/16/2018 at 11:21

MM54 > Steve in Manhattan
11/16/2018 at 15:29

Meanwhile last week I was still in pain and hardly able to eat from getting wisdom teeth out a little under a week prior and was told “too bad, you’re going on-site for this project tomorrow”

MM54 > DipodomysDeserti
11/16/2018 at 15:30

This. You may even be able to get it on amazon and pay for next-day delivery and come out ahead of local cost.