Trashy people, now I'm the trashy neighbor.

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck) 11/04/2018 at 18:48 • Filed to: Fucked

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My wife hosted a baby shower today (not ours) . I came home later to find that someone who was presumably double-parked in our driveway — instead of asking someone to love — drove off my my driveway and through my neighbor’s (which might technically be ours? But he mows it. Whatever) and through the fucking lawn. Like 12 FEET into the lawn away from driveway. The tire tracks indicated they b acked into a rose bush at least twice, making minimum correctional turns. They drove straight over the street curb, made no attempts to get back on the pavement once they passed around the vehicle that was behind them. It was only one of two vehicles that were trapped and neither party will own up to it. I think alcohol may have been involved. Enough to hop a curb and drive through someone’s lawn, anyway.

Now I get to talk with my neighbor and leave him with a nice taste in his mouth. “Wow, when the new neighbors have people over, they drive over my rose bushes. Sweet.”

As I sit here venting via texting because we still have some people staying over and I can’t use choice language, my neck is tired from shaking my head for the last five minutes.

UPDATE : Knocked on their door, no one was home. Came home to write a note for them. Mid-progress, I get a knock on my door. It’s my neighbor and she was none too happy. May have damaged their sprinkler system.

Mmmmmmmmmmmm good thing neighbor feu ds never materialize from such minor things and are easily solved before they escalate, r ight? Hahahaha no wait: the opposite is true 

TheRealBicycleBuck > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 18:54

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That sucks. Let’s hope one of the neighbors had an outside camera so the offending party can be identified and flogged. Or at least pay for the repairs. 

Steve in Manhattan > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 18:58

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Of course you will put it right, and of course it will be smoothed over. We know you - you’re not a schmuck.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > TheRealBicycleBuck 11/04/2018 at 18:59

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I wouldn’t mind knowing. There’s a chance it was a family member. Screaming at family is definitely a bad idea, but that’s what I’ll be doing. If it was that other person, I know where they work and I’ll be visiting them if there is any damage.

It's mostly just the principle of it... Could have easily NOT driven through my neighbor's lawn but alright. Sure, who gives a shit you don't live there not your problem.

CB > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 19:27

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I’d be pissed too. Whoever did it clearly has no respect. Make it clear to your neighbour that you’re just as upset. And if no one owns up to it, I guess put a ban on parties at your place?

Nom De Plume > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 19:42

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The one ray of sunshine here is you weren’t expected to attend this baby shower.  

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > CB 11/04/2018 at 19:50

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The marriage thing complicates that. In a perfect world I'd be completely alone except the wife and maybe doggo. But I like her more than I hate people. And that's saying something. More likely, I'm expecting a potentially blunt barrier to suddenly appear from the neighbor. And I hope to God not because I'm not ready for a property dispute and if he puts up something semi-permanent, it'll be a thing.

merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 19:56

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Once is a mistake, and should be able to be overcome, so as long as nothing like this happens again, should be no issue.  And yeah you’ll have to pay to fix the sprinkler if necessary, but that should cover it.

M.T. Blake > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 20:39

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Walk your dog over onto her side of the lawn for a bathroom break. It’s the proper way to say your sorry to any neighbor. 

vicali > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 20:44

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Oof, that sucks. I’d be more concerned that alcohol was involved and they drove off..

Send a fruit basket to the neighbour?

f86sabre > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 20:56

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Grovel to the neighbor and lash the offender. A nice bottle of wine and an invitation for nice steaks at your place on top of taking care of whatever’s damage. 

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 21:11

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Me thinks it’s time to hunt the assailant. 

OPPOsaurus WRX > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/04/2018 at 21:50

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the day after i moved in I started setting up my kids’ swingset/tree house. I was off ont he property line and was in there back yard. The next week they had a land serveyo r out there putting spikes in the yard.  Talk about the new people taking over they neighborhood....

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > OPPOsaurus WRX 11/04/2018 at 23:20

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I'm expecting something within a week

DipodomysDeserti > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/05/2018 at 00:14

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I’m going to assume this person drives a Hyundai or a Kia. Or a Maxima.

DipodomysDeserti > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/05/2018 at 00:18

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“I like her more than I hate people.”

My wife knows if it wasn’t for her and our kids I’d be living out of a backpack in the middle of the desert. My dog resents them for it.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > DipodomysDeserti 11/05/2018 at 00:35

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Worse: PT Cruiser

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > DipodomysDeserti 11/05/2018 at 00:41

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If she ever leaves me, I'm living in a Toyota Chinook on 20 acres.

Long_Voyager, Now With More Caravanny Goodness > DipodomysDeserti 11/05/2018 at 07:15

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I would have guessed Toyota or Honda CUV.

AdverseMartyr > M.T. Blake 11/05/2018 at 07:58

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You mean his lawn that the neighbor mows, or her actual lawn? (Sorry, it gets confusing with the whole ‘drove onto her lawn that’s actually mine, but they mow it.’)

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/05/2018 at 12:19

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Having to put up with a lot of family shit over the years, all I can say is fuck them and the horse they rode in on. They should be called on their shit and be responsible for their fuck ups. You married your wife not her relatives and friends . -Sorry was that too strong? Maybe I have some built up resentments-

DipodomysDeserti > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/05/2018 at 15:01

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Of course

ArmadaExpress drives a turbo outback > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/06/2018 at 11:31

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But then at lest you know the definite line. I’ve considered doing that, because the survey lines were not spikes driven in, but trail marker tape hanging from brush. Super annoyed.