The factory tow hitch for the 2nd gen BMW X5 requires cutting a hole in the bumper

"Textured Soy Protein" (texturedsoyprotein) 08/30/2017 at 18:44 • Filed to: None

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I saw this X5 4.8i yesterday. My first reaction was “FUCK UNC EVEN THOUGH MY SISTER JUST STARTED GOING THERE FOR GRAD SCHOOL.” Then I noticed the awful hack job on the bumper around the tow hitch. Turns out, it’s the !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! installation method. This might be even worse than my !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! .

bhtooefr > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 18:47

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If I had to guess, that’s because European receivers tend to come into the hitch from the bottom, and they didn’t account for American hitches.

OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 18:48

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I went to UT and my sister just transferred to Vandy from UT. Not very happy with her choice still...

HammerheadFistpunch > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars 08/30/2017 at 18:52

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Whats her focus? Utah is tops in the nation in a few disciplines...or did you mean University of Texas?

Textured Soy Protein > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars 08/30/2017 at 18:52

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I grew up in Maryland so I hate all schools in North Carolina. At least she didn’t go to Duke.

Takuro Spirit > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 18:53

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A lot of factory hitches require the cutting of the bumper. From a small slot, to an entire HOLE SHAPED CHUNK... usually covered by a bezel of some sort.

Sometimes on the back of a bumper are guide lines for where to cut, others include a template with the hitch for easy cut-within-the-lines perfection.

Some vehicles require neither, and don’t even need a hitch. You just bolt the square receiver to the bumper/frame. Like my RAM, and Wranglers.

And often the hitch will replace the rear bumper reinforcement/bar. The hitch becomes part of the crash structure.

#Hitchlopnik

#TMYK

OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > HammerheadFistpunch 08/30/2017 at 18:54

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UT - University of Tennessee

HammerheadFistpunch > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars 08/30/2017 at 19:01

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Ah. Lots of things U and T could mean together.

TheTurbochargedSquirrel > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 19:02

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Don’t mind me, just being smug thinking about how the towing solutions for my tiny BMW product are much more elegant than the towing solutions for the BMW SUV. I am putting one of these on my Mini at some point to tow tires with.

Chariotoflove > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 19:14

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This is vaunted German engineering?

Also, grad school does not count as your alma mater. Make her take it off.

E92M3 > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 19:46

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He did better than this guy.

Textured Soy Protein > Takuro Spirit 08/30/2017 at 20:06

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The specific part of this that bothers me is the crappy metal trim piece added along the edge of the cutout that’s now rusted to all hell.

Textured Soy Protein > TheTurbochargedSquirrel 08/30/2017 at 20:18

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There’s a pretty slick solution for the X5 called the ExecuHitch that has a main piece that mounts under the bumper cover and a quick disconnect ball hitch that curves around the bottom with no cutting. But it’s not the factory BMW one.

Jack Does Cars > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 21:08

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ok but what nc school do you hate the most

rillweid - Now with more TRD and less TDI > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 21:11

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GO HEELS

UNC = University of National Champions

Textured Soy Protein > Jack Does Cars 08/30/2017 at 21:28

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Textured Soy Protein > Chariotoflove 08/30/2017 at 21:37

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The worst part is my dad has been sporting a UNC baseball cap lately, because my sister is very obviously his favorite.

Textured Soy Protein > rillweid - Now with more TRD and less TDI 08/30/2017 at 21:41

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University of Slightly Less Awful Than Duke

Land_Yacht_225 > Jack Does Cars 08/30/2017 at 21:49

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I mean...

WFU FOR THE WIN! GO DEACS!

...but I have a bias.

Jack Does Cars > Land_Yacht_225 08/30/2017 at 22:14

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I’ve heard that WF has a beautiful campus, but I know I won’t be accepted. I guess Wake Tech for two years and then a transfer to UNCA will do.

Jack Does Cars > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 22:14

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Yeah I agree. Is your sister liking UNC so far?

Land_Yacht_225 > Jack Does Cars 08/30/2017 at 22:24

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You would be surprised...I got rejected by Duke and UNC. I say go for it.

Chariotoflove > Textured Soy Protein 08/30/2017 at 22:24

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Clearly a desperate ploy by an aging father to hold on to a connection to his little girl. Still no excuse.

Jack Does Cars > Land_Yacht_225 08/30/2017 at 22:31

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I would, and WF is a very good school, but I know I can pretty much half my tuition by going to Wake Tech. Still, I will apply when the time comes in two-ish years.

bhtooefr > Textured Soy Protein 08/31/2017 at 08:38

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As I said in another comment, European hitches come from below normally.

Here’s the factory electric towbar for the X5:

And here’s the factory (Westfalia) manual one in place: