It's funny how some days gang up on you sometimes

"shop-teacher" (shop-teacher)
08/28/2017 at 10:02 • Filed to: non-sequitur BS

My oldest daughter is starting her second year of preschool today. My wife took the day off from the job she’s grown to hate, to take her there and have a mommy-daughter day afterwards. I took my younger daughter to daycare this morning and she cried the whole time, while I dreaded the possibility of being lectured by our daycare provider yet again for dropping her off either too early, or too late, or right on time ... sometimes I wonder if my money just isn’t green enough. My daughter continued to cry during drop-off, so I didn’t dodged the lecture bullet at least, although that could come this afternoon, when I pick her up. She wanted me to carry her, but we’re trying to teach her to be a big girl and not throw temper-tantrums, so I didn’t. I just wanted to grab her and go home though. We’re planning to take the plunge soon and have my wife quit her job. It will mean more working for me, and less time for me with my girls, but it’s for the greater good of the family.

My system is revolting from all the delicious food I ate this weekend. I feel like donk. I had a great time at the IndyCar race Saturday night.

Wednesday morning we have a meeting about how we’re going to blow up the entire program I’ve worked so hard to build in the district. To say I’m not looking forward to it, would be the understatement of a lifetime. I have to remain professional though.

I kinda just want to hug my mom. I can’t believe she’s been gone over five years already.

I’ll be OK, that’s the gift I have when things get dark for me. I’ve always known that I’ll be OK soon. I just got a text from my wife that preschool drop-off went well. The kid is growing up fast, like they all do. I can’t wait to hug them and hear about their day this afternoon.

Time to go teach some wood-working. I want to work on their CAD drawings, but two weeks into the year now and I still don’t have enough computers for them all.

Sorry for the ramblings. Writing that out helped.

DISCUSSION (34)

OPPOsaurus WRX > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 10:05

It will mean more working for me, and less time for me with my girls, but it’s for the greater good of the family.

welcome to my life.

ttyymmnn > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 10:07

I could go on and on about how much I identify with this, even if the specifics vary. Hang in there.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 10:21

Ttyymmnn said it better than I could have. FDOS for me today with a new crop and a new year.

Your family will be blessed in a big way if Mommy is able to stay at home.

Big Rusty post coming later.

Peace, Yo.

My bird IS the word > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 10:21

If you keep getting lectured, regardless of what time, and you don’t want to bitch the person out I would just take the biggest IDGAF attitude about it. Because I would go straight to nuclear.

Chariotoflove > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 10:24

Watched some old clips from my girl’s third birthday party Saturday, and the feels are still twisting my heart. Sometimes I just want to go back, but then I remember that now is pretty great too.

I could so be a stay at home dad. But it’s not in the cards. At least I get weekends. And bedtime is still mine.

Hang in there, pal. The day still has the potential to surprise you.

shop-teacher > Chariotoflove
08/28/2017 at 10:37

I get to be a stay at home dad in the summer. It’s pretty great.

Thanks!

shop-teacher > OPPOsaurus WRX
08/28/2017 at 10:38

Yep. Welcome to a lot of dude’s lives. I’m OK with it.

shop-teacher > ttyymmnn
08/28/2017 at 10:38

Thanks!

shop-teacher > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo
08/28/2017 at 10:39

Thanks!

Looking forward to hearing more about Rusty.

Chariotoflove > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 10:40

Lucky! :)

shop-teacher > My bird IS the word
08/28/2017 at 10:42

I have to bite my tongue, because if I say anything I will unleash and verbally rip her head off. Instead I’ve gone the passive-aggressive route. I’m supposed to pick up by 4:15. Sometimes I would be there at 4:05 because I’m able to wrap up quickly and get out of school, and then sometimes I’d be more like 4:25 because life happens. Then the lecturing started. Now, I pull in at 4:15 on the dot every day. Never late, but never early. Even if I have to drive around the neighborhood

shop-teacher > Chariotoflove
08/28/2017 at 10:43

Definitely!

wkiernan > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 10:57

Wednesday morning we have a meeting about how we’re going to blow up the entire program I’ve worked so hard to build in the district.

Can you tell us more about this program?

XJDano > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 11:06

My wife would tell me stories. Best to do is drop them off and walk out. It’s the Teachers job to deal with them during the day.

WilliamsSW > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 11:07

That’s awesome! A lot of great time with the girls, I’m sure!

functionoverfashion > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 11:09

Right there with you, this week is going to be a tough one in our family as well. I could talk about preschool dropoff scenarios for days. It gets better.

Take care, hang in there.

WilliamsSW > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 11:09

Ugh! On the bright side, 3 day weekend coming up quick! My situation is different but this is our first day back from vacation, so I’m not thrilled by the day, either.

+/- 10 minutes seems extremely picky to get lectured on, TBH.

Good luck on Wednesday. I hope it comes down to something you can feel good about.

Dave the car guy , still here > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 11:24

Hang in there, hopefully things will improve. Maybe things will get better as the week goes by.

shop-teacher > Dave the car guy , still here
08/28/2017 at 11:39

It will. Things always get better. It felt good to get it off my chest. Thanks!

shop-teacher > WilliamsSW
08/28/2017 at 11:40

Yep, it is!

shop-teacher > WilliamsSW
08/28/2017 at 11:43

Yes it is! Looking forward to it.

Sometimes she’s fine with it, and sometimes I get a super sing-songy lecture about not respecting her time. It’s total BS.

Thanks. I’m going to do my best to make it so.

shop-teacher > functionoverfashion
08/28/2017 at 11:44

Thanks! You as well!

shop-teacher > XJDano
08/28/2017 at 11:44

That’s what we do. Still sucks sometimes though.

shop-teacher > wkiernan
08/28/2017 at 11:54

Sure. I teach 6th, 7th and 8th grades. Every 6th and 7th grader is required to take my class through a 6-week rotation. In 6th grade we teach them 2D AutoCAD, and we do an engineering unit to teach them about structures and the design process. in 7th grade we do some more 2D CAD, as well as 3D solid modeling and 3D printing. Then we take them in the shop for a few weeks and do some basic sheet metal fabrication. In 8th grade the class is no longer required for everybody, they instead pick their favorite four out of five choices, and then they get a 9-week rotation. In that class we do more 2D and 3D CAD, as well as wood working in the shop.

Starting next year, it will only be required to take classes like mine, or Art or Music. The kids who do take it will get a longer version. I think it’s a terrible idea, middle school is for figuring out what you like and what you want to do. I’ve had hundreds of students over the years who never would’ve taken this class if they weren’t forced to, but then end up absolutely loving it.

I’m terrified of losing the girls out of my program. They’re not only good at shop classes, on the whole they’re better at it than the boys. The world needs more women in STEM-related professions, how are they going to know it’s an option, if they’re interested, that they’re good at it, if they never get exposed to it?

TheRealBicycleBuck > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 12:33

Parallel lives.

I remember the first time I had to drop off my daughter at day care. The image of her standing at the glass door, crying, calling out to me, still brings tears to my eyes.

We arranged for my wife to quit working about a year later. She was able to stay at home until both of the kiddos started school.

I am very fortunate to have a boss who was a workaholic in his younger years and is now living vicariously through me. His dad was the scout leader, the coach, etc., so he has all of these fantastic memories of his dad being there for him. He was career military before joining our firm, so he missed the opportunity to be there for his kids.

Now he’s more than accommodating when it comes to my family activities. I’ve been able to be the Scout Master, the basketball, volleyball, and track coach. As long as I keep him informed and stay on top of my work (often working from home at night), he lets me do what I need to do for my kids.

Yeah, I’m a lucky guy.

shop-teacher > TheRealBicycleBuck
08/28/2017 at 12:36

Indeed. I think we both are.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 13:26

“. We’re planning to take the plunge soon and have my wife quit her job.”

Don’t let her drop out of the workforce.

If she wants to quit her job because she supposedly hates it, she should have another job lined up.

And three reasons why this is a terrible idea:

1. It will be much harder to get a job in the future if she has a big gap on her resume

2. If you ever get divorced, you are at high risk of getting fuckes over twice as bad because she will be viewed as a dependent that you will have to keep supporting.

3. If you became ill and couldn’t work for a while (or worse), you wouldn’t have her income to fall back on.

And one other reason that isnt as good, but it irks me... she will miss promotion opportunities which contribute that much more to the male/female wage gap that feminists Claim is due to “oppression” and “sexism”.

Don’t let her drop out of the workforce. If she hates her job, the real solution is for her to look for another job.

Transit > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 14:15

We did the math and with the added cost of day care and such, with 2 kids my wife would be working to pay for all that and take home about $10k a year on top. It just wasn’t worth the hassle.

To come home and see how much she enjoys spending time with the kids makes all the hours I put in worthwhile.

shop-teacher > Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
08/28/2017 at 14:15

These are all good points. She wants to get out of the industry she’s in completely. I’m not worried about #1, because whatever she does next will either require more schooling, or be an administrative job. She does plan to return to work when both kids are in school full time. I have considered point #2 very seriously, but our marriage is solid. Of course things can change, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take. There have been plenty of divorces among my friends and family, to be aware of those implications. #3 won’t be a problem due to illness. We have a sick leave bank that I have contributed to, so I can take off as long as necessary for illness in my immediate family. If worse than that happens to me, that is the only thing that scares me.

shop-teacher > Transit
08/28/2017 at 14:23

The number for us is closer to $15k, but I can make up the bulk of that with after school stuff and side jobs. We’ll make it work!

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 15:48

She wants out of the industry she’s in?

If you agree to her quitting, then it should be for her to start full time training to facilitate the career change with a clearly defined plan that includes her finishing the training as fast as possible and immediately looking for work.

Don’t let her just quit and go along with the BS that she’ll figure out what she wants to do after she quits.

I made that mistake.

“I have considered point #2 very seriously, but our marriage is solid. Of course things can change, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

I used to think that too. But these things can change pretty quickly.

In my own case, I went from my now-Ex talking about having another child (I wasn’t opposed to it, but I did point out how it went against some of her own personal goals)... and then less than 6 months later, she left, accused me of things I didn’t do and used that false premise to end the relationship.

And now, about 10 years and at least $200,000 in money I paid her later, my ex still doesn’t have her financial/career act together and I recently helped her move back in with her parents. The kids (who are teens now) are with me full time. She’s struggling to find even a crappy job due to her less-than-ideal resume.

That happened because she felt like doing, not what she needed to do.

It can only happen to you if you allow it to happen.

I did not do that years ago and have regretted it ever since.

EngineerWithTools > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 19:13

That’s a cool program. I remember being introduced to Autocad in high school in the late 80s. (Yikes!) I would have been an engineer anyway (my grandfather was one), but that was a big push.

CAD is a just tool in the end (and I love high end ones like NX), but it can be a way to express yourself, if you’re geometrically inclined. Giving that tool to kids and watching them flourish must be very rewarding. Fingers crossed for your program and participation!

shop-teacher > EngineerWithTools
08/28/2017 at 19:38

Thanks, it is very rewarding. I’ll fight with everything I have to keep the soul of the program intact, and keep girls in it.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > shop-teacher
08/28/2017 at 22:34

I need to retorque the head bolts. Waiting on valve cover gasket.