There Are Definitely Crappier Places to Be

"PatBateman" (PatBateman) 07/22/2017 at 13:13 • Filed to: Miami, 1% Life

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So I’m in Miami for business, and I’m in awe of the opulence of the area I’m staying in (Brickell, pronounce “Brickle”, and not “Brick-ell” like normal people would say it). I walked three blocks today and saw a Ferrari 488 GTB, a Ferrari California, and a Huracan convertible (purple, because Miami).

Last night, there was a McLaren 570S parked in front of the cigar bar I was at. The hardest part about seeing these cars was not geeking out and SR20-ing. I was with very successful people, so doing so would’ve been uncouth to them. My favorite car, though, was the Buick LaCrosse with the landau top I saw today. Keep that shit going, old people.

The YACHTS, though... My hotel overlooks the bay and Biscayne Key bridge where all the big yachts cruise past. As I write this, there’s a 50+ foot pleasure yacht motoring by. It appears that there are bikini-clad ladies on the bow sunpad tanning themselves. Plenty of offshore fishing boats are sailing by as well.

Pics that I’ve taken since I started writing this:

Look, y’all: I don’t exactly live in a shitty part of Houston. There are lots of exotics and nice cars around, and if you go down to the right yacht club near Galveston, million dollar plus boats are moored there. With that said, this area of Miami is just amazing when it comes to high end motoring, on both land and sea.

I’d still prefer to rock a 1990 white Ford Mustang GT drop top down A1A (BEACHFRONT AVENUE)!

Rico > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 13:27

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I think you would fit right in tbh. You’ve got the right taste and Miami has a bunch of cool stuff to do. Also renting exotics over there is kind of cheap compared to anywhere else because they are a dime a dozen.

fintail > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 13:32

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No finer place on the east coast (outside of 725 5th Ave) for money laundering.

The colorful late model Rolls-Royce/Bentleys in the area can add some charm too.

PatBateman > Rico 07/22/2017 at 13:36

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While I’m impressed with the cars, the boats are what has caught the majority of my interest. It seems like it’s just a parade of high end yachts marching out to the Atlantic by my hotel. And while I appreciate the large fishing boats (I’m personally in love with the larger Midnight Express center console boats with five big ass outboard engines on the back, look it up), those pompously extravagant pleasure boats are fantastic.

PatBateman > fintail 07/22/2017 at 13:39

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I forgot to mention the cocaine white Bentley Mulsanne in front of the bar last night, too.

Yesterday, when I was in the taxi from the airport to the hotel, I kept looking up at all the expensive high rise condo buildings in the area while thinking to myself, “How many of these were built on the money coming from drug smuggling?”

My guess is 75%.

Rico > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 14:25

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Damn those are some nice boats! Yeah I’d love to switch places with the owners of those boats for a few days (whether they are on them or renting them out!) just to experience that lifestyle.

PatBateman > Rico 07/22/2017 at 14:27

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Just had my first true mega yacht stroll by, but couldn’t take a good pic. This is it from a few miles away.

PatBateman > Rico 07/22/2017 at 14:30

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Here’s a nice one, too. Just looked up after making my comment to you and snapped a pic.

ETA: the smaller boat appears to be about 32' long.

fintail > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 14:31

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I’ve heard something along those lines. I think Miami would far fewer highrises without dirty money. Hell, the same could be said for many cities.

I get banner ads from the Rolls-Royce dealer in Miami now and then (not sure why), and they often have cars in unusual colors. Perfect for the area.

PatBateman > fintail 07/22/2017 at 14:33

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In the documentary Cocaine Cowboys, the underlying funding for most of the new build high rises and towers here were spelled out clearly: C-O-C-A-I-N-E.

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 14:48

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A Honduran diplomat lives in our town and his family drives around in a bentayga now. This isn’t a white collar town so everybody just stares at a it. His son is dumb as a sack of rocks, he repeated the 11th grade (makes me feel better).

TheRealBicycleBuck > Rico 07/22/2017 at 14:53

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Only if it comes with the commensurate bankroll. Operating one of those big boats is expensive!

Rico > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 15:04

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You are referring to the white one just between/ahead of the two highway columns right?

Rico > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 15:04

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That’s insane! So we’re talking almost 100 FT long?

Rico > TheRealBicycleBuck 07/22/2017 at 15:06

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Oh yeah! I mean just to have one of those for a few days, throw a couple parties and hang out with some beautiful women. They can take it back come maintenance time haha.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 15:09

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Half of florida will be under water in the next 20-40 years. They will need those yatchs.

6691 zapS > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 16:03

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fintail > PatBateman 07/22/2017 at 16:55

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I might have seen that there. I also remember on a visit to Miami when I went on a boat tour, the guide was making cracks about organized crime and condo development,

It would be interesting to see similar study made of recent tall buildings in Seattle/Bellevue and maybe a few other places.

6691 zapS > 6691 zapS 07/22/2017 at 17:03

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NJAnon > PatBateman 07/23/2017 at 22:22

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Pat, thats everyday too. I mean once you’ve sifted pass the old people (no offense old people) you can really enjoy florida and the nice aspect of its tourism. Boating, sand in your shorts. See some alligators and flamingos or a barracuda and watch it shred a fish to pieces.

Now the bikini ladies will smile at you but some of them kind of have egos so choose wisely. :P

PatBateman > NJAnon 07/23/2017 at 23:24

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The fact that it’s every day is part of what is fascinating to me. Saturday wasn’t a special day; it was just the weekend. Crazy.

I’m married with children, so the ladies can have whatever sized ego they want. I’m off the market.