![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:46 • Filed to: Odds are this guy has never been laid | ![]() | ![]() |
You should all be able to hear the sound of my eyes rolling, because that’s how hard they’re rolling.
Something is missing here ....
Just a wider shot
That’s nice
No shit. Imagine that.
Seriously dude?
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:52 |
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I can already predict that despite both of us being car enthusiasts, I would not be able to have a conversation with this person.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:52 |
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Classy. The ladies must swoon over a red Hyundai with dbag stickers.
My 4 cyl 2.1l MB diesel also has TTs. No blue exhaust tips or hashtags though, and it isn’t ill.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:54 |
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Don’t worry with those God-awful Eagle f1s he won’t be long for this road.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:55 |
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A guy at my work has the following stickers (Ram 2500 diesel):
- If you want it, work for it, it’s that simple (his mom and dad paid for his truck)
- Your mother should have swallowed
- If this flag offends you, you need a history lesson (guess what flag...)
- It’s all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:58 |
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I remember when the first Audi TT came out, Autoweek (I think) had the cover line “Show us your TTs!”. They got a ration of shit for it.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:59 |
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Yeah, I think stabbing my ear own drum with a pencil would likely be preferable.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:59 |
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So what you’re saying is I need to festoon the M3 with stickers and then I’ll get all the girls. This must be what I’m doing wrong.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 16:59 |
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Oh, I’m sure they do!
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:01 |
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But is it lit and/or woke?
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:05 |
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Hah! I would not be able to keep my mouth shut upon seeing the driver. “Are you serious dude?”
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:08 |
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If not, that curbed wheel missing a lugnut has to do it.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:11 |
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Plus he’s from Illinois
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:13 |
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I’m sure he drives responsibly.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:14 |
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Not to mention the fast food bag in the car. The smell of that interior must be so attractive.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:15 |
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Douchecruiser 3000
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:16 |
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Wait... Are blue exhaust tips not ok anymore? Shit, so hard to keep up with what the ricers make not ok
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:16 |
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Imagine it on a hot summer day.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:18 |
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That one matches the car, nice coordination.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:23 |
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NSFW, is this what he meant?
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:23 |
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You should probably put stickers on yourself too
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:31 |
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This is the guy that gets killed during the opening credits of a Fast and Furious movie.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:45 |
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The only thing that would make it better is if the car was yellow
![]() 07/12/2017 at 17:53 |
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I’m no doctor, but why would I want to see any guy’s (especially this one) Individual Throttlebodies. That could be a contagious mutation.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:28 |
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That “panty dropper” sticker is like saying
“I strongly believe my car to be a symbolic representation of my phallus,”
which is a ridiculous enough sticker to put on a perfectly good but not all that interesting car even if it didn’t conclude:
“...and the phallic symbol I have chosen to show to the world drives like an overweight terrier humping a throw pillow with surprising vigor.”
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:30 |
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Another classy dude.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:34 |
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Ha!
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:35 |
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Hey now! I resemble that! We’re not all assholes. I mean, this guy clearly is ...
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:36 |
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Yes, that will certainly definitely work.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:37 |
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I didn’t even notice the curb rash. I took the picture because of the missing wheel. He also had mismatched novelty valvestem caps, because of course he did.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:39 |
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Sometimes a joke should be kept to one’s self or close friends.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:40 |
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Something like that ...
![]() 07/12/2017 at 18:40 |
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I didn’t see him. I probably would’ve just walked away laughing and shaking my head.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 19:01 |
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I mean, I’m not going to argue the you don’t resemble that
Hehe
![]() 07/12/2017 at 19:06 |
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Well, I walked into that one!
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:20 |
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I can see him now. Surprised this wasn’t in front of a gym where “lifting” is the key activity.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:24 |
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I assume it belongs to an employee at the O’Reilly’s I went to, as I didn’t see any other customers there.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:25 |
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He probably bought it with the proceeds from writing their terrible jingle.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:26 |
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On the bright side, this clown will never reproduce.
100% chance he never got beyond the first aisle with all the junk at O’Reilly.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:27 |
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One can only hope!
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:27 |
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I doubt he’s that talented.
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:31 |
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You’ll be able to buy many many E9Xs with all the money you save by not going on dates, getting married, having kids, etc
![]() 07/12/2017 at 21:38 |
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![]() 07/13/2017 at 01:38 |
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Now I know who Brad was talking about....NSFW:
![]() 07/13/2017 at 06:26 |
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Actual magazine cover....
![]() 07/13/2017 at 09:09 |
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yeah, he rivals James Bond when it comes to class. Knows his favorite Claret down to the vintage and has a taste for caviar.
![]() 07/13/2017 at 09:21 |
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Soooo, Natty Light and gas station nachos then, right?
![]() 07/13/2017 at 10:15 |
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yes. Haha. He also once had a girlfriend that lived in a tent on her mom’s ex-husband’s lot that he had for his trailer. She went back to her ex-boyfriend a few months after he got out of prison. 4 or 5 months later she called “I’m pregnant, not sure if it’s you or him”, it ended up being “him”.
![]() 07/13/2017 at 10:44 |
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Wow! Sounds like your coworker dodged a major bullet.
![]() 07/13/2017 at 11:03 |
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Not to worry, he’s back with his ex-wife he married even after catching her and his “best” friend in bed together within weeks of the wedding. She mostly uses him, she’s driving his 2011-ish Dodge Charger that he bought to commute back and forth to work.
![]() 07/13/2017 at 11:07 |
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He’s a special kind of dumbass.
![]() 07/13/2017 at 11:11 |
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Yep, he can’t help himself. He’s an episode of Jerry Springer, the only difference being is that he hasn’t been on Jerry Spring (or similar) yet.
![]() 07/13/2017 at 13:54 |
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I know the type. My brother-in-law’s ex-wife is a walking episode of Maury Povich. She gave birth to another man’s twins while they were married.
![]() 07/13/2017 at 15:30 |
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Well, they may be made for each other!
![]() 07/13/2017 at 15:37 |
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Sounds like it!
![]() 07/14/2017 at 09:42 |
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Daily Driver sticker on a late model car? Who’da guessed a not-old car would be a daily driver?
![]() 07/14/2017 at 09:46 |
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I know, right? Especially a not old car who’s only visible modifications are stickers and blue tinted exhaust tips.
![]() 07/29/2017 at 16:17 |
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Typical Saturday night for the Guy?
![]() 07/29/2017 at 18:20 |
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Pretty much, yeah. I went back a few days ago to return my core. That car was there again. Must be an employee.
![]() 07/29/2017 at 18:28 |
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He needs to be careful about that. The Priests were right, I can only focus one eye at a time now.
![]() 07/29/2017 at 18:33 |
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Hahahaha!