Cars I Do Hate. Vol. 5

"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch) 04/27/2017 at 10:00 • Filed to: Cars I do hate

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Is it too easy to pick on Cerberus era Chrysler? I don’t think so.

I think what really bugs me about this is the first generation was genuinely a pretty great little truck for its day. It was smartly styled and had V8 power.

The 2nd generation was pretty great looking and pretty well made, though it was pretty dreary inside...nothing to compare with this generation.

This feels as if it was made by a lack of cares made corporeal and organized into a committee to discuss ways to make it cheaper.

But I guess that’s Cerberus Capitol to a T isn’t it.

It still came with a V8 that wasn’t too bad, though not too great either producing at best 260 hp from 4.7 liters...though it was offered with a stick for the V8 and the massively terrible and underwhelming 3.7L V6. 

The sales numbers tell the story here: Typically when a new model is launched there is a large uptick in sales, even if the new model isn’t very good on account of it simply being new and fresh and in publications.

When the 3rd and final Dakota went on sale it sold less than its previous model, and never went anywhere but down.

Chrysler pulled the plug on the Dakota name citing “lack of interest” and yeah, I guess that’s one way to put it...

p.s. I know you think the Mitsubishi raider is worse but it didn’t look worse, and it was actually a little nicer inside AND it had a better warranty when new so...yeah.

EL_ULY > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:04

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was the 5.9L V8 on the previous gen any good. I know nothing about it :(

Honeybunchesofgoats > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:05

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Open storage pockets anywhere but the door make me die inside.

Ash78, voting early and often > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:05

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To be a little fair to the Dakota, that whole segment started drying up and the Ram went both upmarket and downmarket at the same time. They put this truck out of business themselves (as with most midsize trucks). They just didn’t know what to do with it, but Cerberus definitely didn’t help. I prefer my dogs with one head, not three.

Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:07

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I love the Dakota, but seriously, downhill in 2005. The ‘92-96 and ‘97-04s were the best by far.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:08

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I don’t really get the shit that the 3.7 gets. I’ve put a ton of miles on both the loved 4.3, and the 3.7, and I find the 3.7 better in every way. It’s smoother, more powerful, just as efficient, better sounding under load, super reliable if you know to change the oil, etc. It’s not a powerhouse, but for it’s day it was fine for a base truck engine.

LongbowMkII > EL_ULY 04/27/2017 at 10:08

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so long as you dont have a real interest in power or economy. it’s essentially the same V8 chrysler used for 50 years

HammerheadFistpunch > Ash78, voting early and often 04/27/2017 at 10:08

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Yeah it was true that the mid size market was slowly thinning out but even the ranger was selling better when this thing left

Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. > EL_ULY 04/27/2017 at 10:09

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It’s not bad, but it shines in the insane levels of aftermarket. Stock it was 245HP and 345LBft with a 4500RPM redline. However due to the fact that the Magnum was a slightly modified LA engine, all the parts are available. Superchargers, intake manifolds, heads, 408 stroker kits, 1.6 roller rockers. You name it.

Sir Halffast > Ash78, voting early and often 04/27/2017 at 10:10

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Also, that interior is horrendous. It’s the opposite of inviting, even for a work truck. It looks like it WANTS you to get out and never come back.

Ash78, voting early and often > Sir Halffast 04/27/2017 at 10:13

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I sort of feel that way about all black interiors, but some are better than others. If that interior above just had a few contrasting colors or trim to brighten it up, it would be so much better.

Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. 04/27/2017 at 10:14

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i miss my regular cab, short box 98

Urambo Tauro > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:16

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I’m conflicted about that interior. At first glance, I don’t like it. But why? I’m usually the kind of guy who wants a pickup truck to be dead simple and easy to clean. Shouldn’t I actually prefer those broad, plain, chunky surfaces?

vondon302 > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:16

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Why buy a nice Dakota when you can have a mid range Ram for just a little more. Is what killed this.

My rule for Chrysler’s is stay away from the .7s. The 4.7 and 3.7 were junk.

Sir Halffast > Ash78, voting early and often 04/27/2017 at 10:16

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It’s the absolute worst version of plastic fantastic. Plus they couldn’t even bother to do a glove box door? I know, cost cutting, but really? And yeah, a bit of faux aluminum trim would help. They did the fake steel stamp on the seats, it wouldn’t have been much of a stretch.

EDIT: I guess they did do the glove box, just in that horrible, hit-your-knees-when-you-open-it, under-the-dash position.

Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. > Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero 04/27/2017 at 10:18

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I miss my ‘02 every time I drive my Ram. Still wish I had fixed the trailer brakes after the first day of that trip. (they worked when I left the house)

EL_ULY > Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. 04/27/2017 at 10:19

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4500 redline? No manches! That is insane. Sill, it seems like a very solid unit after mods. Underrated beast? Seems like it

19JRC99 > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:21

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“I think what really bugs me about this is the first generation was genuinely a pretty great little truck for its day. It was smartly styled and had V8 power.”

You just saved yourself from my wrath. I adore my ‘96.

Shift24 > EL_ULY 04/27/2017 at 10:22

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Similar to what GM did with the their refresh of the truck motors in the 90s. Update them mainly for fuel injection, newer heads, intake, and fuel system, and call them something different. So the magnum v8s are still your common 318 and 360 which like GMs 305 and 350 have been made forever. But some of the updated parts were not developed enough, a very common issue is cracked heads due to heat (even normal engine operating temp). And the parts that backed them up were not as reliable ether.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Ash78, voting early and often 04/27/2017 at 10:26

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That’s the biggest reason I got orange seats in my Fiesta ST, it livens up the horrendously dull interior.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Urambo Tauro 04/27/2017 at 10:27

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If it helps you decide, it was designed to be able to use while wearing thick work gloves.

HammerheadFistpunch > vondon302 04/27/2017 at 10:29

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Why buy a nice a[n] nice expensive Dakota when can have a nice ram at any price?

jimz > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 10:30

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That revision was done while still under Daimler. I was at JTE (Jeep-Truck Engineering on Plymouth Rd) at the time and saw the pre-production ones. I was shocked they could make it uglier.

And the dreary interiors were the result of a mandate from Stuttgart to pull 40% of the cost out of Chrysler Group interiors. Apparently the ME412 concept (and production plans) pissed off enough Daimler higher-ups that they had to “put those Chrysler peasants in their place.”

Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. > EL_ULY 04/27/2017 at 10:35

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It’s basically a tow truck motor and not a performance piece out of the box. But add a few pieces..

Urambo Tauro > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/27/2017 at 10:40

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Yeah, there’s that. I don’t know if it makes me any less conflicted, but I sure can appreciate that kind of design thoughtfulness.

It’s always nice to see traditional 3-knob HVAC controls. The white gauge faces look out of place, though. Depending on the font, a white background can sometimes help make it look sporty or sometimes classy. But I’m not getting either of those vibes here. It just looks “ACK too bright”.

EL_ULY > Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. 04/27/2017 at 10:41

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OH BABY! What a gem! I’ve been looking at vids and posts about this. Very fascinated indeed

HammerheadFistpunch > jimz 04/27/2017 at 10:55

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It really was a tossup for who was more evil wasn’t it? The 3 headed dog of hades, or Dr. Z.

AfromanGTO > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 11:03

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98-03 RT Dakota is still best Dakota!

The 3rd Gen was a huge piece and ugly. It is like they tried to make something uglier than a pt cruiser truck love child.

jimz > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 11:09

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I don’t think Cerberus was “evil” per se, they were just in it for a quick flip. Had the bottom not dropped out in 09, and they launched the ‘11 300 and Grand Cherokee, they’d have had a stronger hand.

Flyboy is FAA certified insane > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 11:35

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I like my Dakota. The 4.7 and 6-speed stick combo makes it decently fun to drive. Trailering package gives it a 7000lbs towing capacity.

Unlaiden thought it handles surprisingly well for a truck.

LongbowMkII > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 11:45

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both are 23% iron oxide by now anyways

shop-teacher > LongbowMkII 04/27/2017 at 13:37

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Rounding down I see.

shop-teacher > HammerheadFistpunch 04/27/2017 at 13:39

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When the third gen Dakota came out, I was horrified. Dakotas were always great looking trucks, but the third gen does not have one single attractive angle or feature in it’s entire design.