Pestlopnik: Armadillo Edition

Kinja'd!!! "OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars" (jakeauern)
02/24/2017 at 14:30 • Filed to: None

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Anyone have tips on how to get rid of one of these buggers? The future mother-in-law has one tearing up the yard.

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I’m thinking my 9mm but she lives in city limits. She has a lot of land and the nearest neighbor is at least 500 feet away with plenty of trees to cover it though. Any other ideas?

Here’s Gibbs being proper for your time.

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DISCUSSION (30)


Kinja'd!!! OPPOsaurus WRX > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:35

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a silencer


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > OPPOsaurus WRX
02/24/2017 at 14:36

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I need the Hearing Protection Act to pass ASAP then.


Kinja'd!!! Biggus Dickus (RevsBro) > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:36

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AWWWWW GREYHOUND!!!!!

Also, a couple of these should do the trick nicely:

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On a more serious note, get some subsonic ammo for the 9mm, and do the ghetto “oil filter” suppressor method.


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Biggus Dickus (RevsBro)
02/24/2017 at 14:38

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My biggest worry is noise. I’m thinking one shot during the middle of the day wouldn’t bother anyone though.


Kinja'd!!! RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:38

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Drone strikes? Dynamite? A polonium pellet in an airgun umbrella? Anti-armadillo trained badgers?


Kinja'd!!! Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:39

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Subsonic .22 longs? May take more than one, but you’re probably less likely to be noticed than a (or multiple) 9mm report.

Is trapping an option? I’ve yet to encounter an armadillo (VA/ME resident).


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:42

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Low velocity 22 rounds? Any kind of higher caliber rifle or hand gun is going to attract attention. If I was there I’d use my bow and kill the fucker at 40'. Otherwise live trap from animal control?


Kinja'd!!! My bird IS the word > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:42

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Normally I reccomend a .22 subsonic pellet rifle. No crack, you can shoot it from in your house and your neighbors will be none the wiser. Used to eliminate squirrels and groundhogs. However, it is an armadillo, so you might need something with some penetration.


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever
02/24/2017 at 14:43

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I’m in Tennessee so the Armadillo thing is fairly recent(last 5 years or so). I have access to a .22 LR I think so may go that route.


Kinja'd!!! Biggus Dickus (RevsBro) > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:43

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I edited in the second half so you my have missed it but I think some subsonic 9mm plus the ghetto suppressor should work.


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Biggus Dickus (RevsBro)
02/24/2017 at 14:43

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I may have to build one just for this. How much do you think that would cost?


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > My bird IS the word
02/24/2017 at 14:45

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Hmmm... that looks fun.


Kinja'd!!! crowmolly > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:46

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Havahart trap then throw the whole thing in a trash can filled with water.


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > crowmolly
02/24/2017 at 14:47

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Hahah that’s the most ironic thing I’ve read this week. Have a heart, then drown it.


Kinja'd!!! Biggus Dickus (RevsBro) > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:48

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Legality is questionable, but a large oil filter with a hole drilled in the end should work.


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Biggus Dickus (RevsBro)
02/24/2017 at 14:50

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I just need the darn Hearing Protection Act to go through. Once that happens I could use the Oil Filter Trick all day.


Kinja'd!!! Biggus Dickus (RevsBro) > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:50

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Also the filter will probably block the sight picture, so probably not practical for this.


Kinja'd!!! crowmolly > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 14:52

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Does it Hav-a-hart? Yes? Then give it a bath.


Kinja'd!!! 404 - User No Longer Available > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 15:03

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Shoot it.


Kinja'd!!! Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 15:06

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Have you got a .22?


Kinja'd!!! My X-type is too a real Jaguar > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 15:11

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Treat the yard for grubs and worms, the Amridillo will move on as there is no food left.


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap
02/24/2017 at 15:12

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My dad has a .22 LR. Also have acces to a 40 cal.


Kinja'd!!! Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 15:12

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I thought you were in TN. I’m in SW VA (Roanoke), so not terribly far from TN. Had no clue armadillos had made it this far northeast. I guess I can add them to the list of killer bees and feral hogs that are approaching from the southwest. Great.

Bored at work and decided to do a bit of searching, seems .22 might not do the trick (aim for the 3rd/4th band, heart/lung shot is the best bet):

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever
02/24/2017 at 15:15

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I have some hollow points but they are expensive. Might have to use them.


Kinja'd!!! Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 15:19

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Well you’re going to have to keep it quiet.


Kinja'd!!! Rico > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 15:25

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Can you just have animal control come and remove it?


Kinja'd!!! PotbellyJoe and 42 others > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 15:26

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Bubble gum. They love it due to the smell and sugar but it chokes them to death.

Make sure it’s the super soft stuff and full of sugar, Bubble Yum Orginal was always my jam for varmints.


Kinja'd!!! OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > Rico
02/24/2017 at 15:29

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I don’t think they will. I think they only pick up cats and dogs here


Kinja'd!!! The Snowman > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 18:25

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Step one. Get a no kill cage and bait it.

Step two. Make hat.

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Kinja'd!!! Rico > OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars
02/24/2017 at 18:42

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It doesn’t hurt to ask. Animal control also helps out when there’s a rabid animal like a possum or a raccoon too so you never know.