So my Mom owns this now.

"If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee)
11/12/2017 at 13:54 • Filed to: None

Well, sort of. It was left behind by an ex employee. After many attempts to contact him and get him to remove it, it’s been sitting on her property long enough that she could claim it as abandoned and get a title if she wants to.

I honestly don’t think it’s worth it to save it. We don’t know if it runs, there’s no key, it needs new tires, the interior is trashed, and it’s probably all rusted out underneath. It is mildly built and might be worth something to a fan of these cars but neither of us has the time or money to rehab it.

DISCUSSION (31)

Chan - Mid-engine with cabin fever > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 13:59

Win!

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:01

That’s a win for you!

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > K-Roll-PorscheTamer
11/12/2017 at 14:02

See my edit

Dusty Ventures > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:03

Step 1: cage it

Step 2: dress it up to look like a fox

Step 3: add sound system that plays the weird sounds from “What does the fox say” on loop

Step 4: Enter LeMons as “What does the foxbody say”

Step 5: Accept trophy

Steve in Manhattan > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:05

Part it out?

Alfalfa > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:08

But it’s got hood pins. That means it’s fast.

Urambo Tauro > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:09

5.0 badges, manual transmission... looking good so far.

But after seeing that light switch, I’m a little worried about the quality of other modifications...

I think it’s still worth hotwiring and checking it out.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:10

Give it to Dusty or another Oppo who will turn it into the best lemons race car ever.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:11

Drift car!

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Urambo Tauro
11/12/2017 at 14:12

I know the engine has had some work done to it but I don’t know the exact nature of the upgrades. I think it also has an LSD.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
11/12/2017 at 14:19

Kinja'd!!!

If anything I’d turn it into an homage to the old DTM racers.

Kinja'd!!!

Tapas > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:20

Lemons car?!

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Tapas
11/12/2017 at 14:21

That’s not feasible.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:23

Or that. You’ve heard of the Targa Newfoundland, right?

Urambo Tauro > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:30

Probably. If you (or your mom) won’t be fixing it up, you should at least inspect it a little before listing it for sale. Got any pics of the engine bay or underneath?

Dusty Ventures > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:37

I have a lot of garage space...

Shoop > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 14:51

Buy another one and move the good parts over.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Shoop
11/12/2017 at 14:57

I’ll get right on that with all the money that I don’t have.

That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 15:27

I see that the truck next to it has MA plates...is the Mustang in MA?

Spridget > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 15:34

Get it running, then hoon it until it dies.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms
11/12/2017 at 15:54

Yes, but it’s titled in NH

OpposResidentLexusGuy - USE20, XF20, XU30 and Press Cars > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 16:27

My parents are about to file a shopowners lean on a white’12-’14 GS350 F Sport. Much excite.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 17:34

Why not both .gif

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Alfalfa
11/12/2017 at 17:36

I once saw a Sebring Convertible with about a dozen stick on fake hood pin things. Apparently the owner also subscribed to that that process

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 17:38

If I were closer I’d come get it. I’m in desperate need of something crappy, manual, and RWD

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 18:17

Chop chop, boi

Tristan > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 18:34

If you weren’t on the opposite side of the U.S., I’d be there with a trailer tomorrow. I had a black ‘89 LX 5.0 hatch that needed more love than I could give it a few years back, and I dearly miss it. I’d give this one all the love it needs to bring it back to glory. :(

I’d start with finding some correct seats, deep cleaning the upholstery, and bolting on a set of 10-hole wheels like God intended. Then, find a stock hood, bolt on a Mac catback and some 3.73 gears and just cruise it. I love these cars.

Tapas > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/12/2017 at 23:42

You could put it on BaT...

TheD0k_2many toys 2little time > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/13/2017 at 00:48

mmmm gimmee

briannutter1 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
11/14/2017 at 05:19

Want to trade a currently non running but otherwise awesome Volvo 850 turbo wagon for it?

functionoverfashion > Tapas
11/14/2017 at 10:50

Literally, though. Bring a trailer.