Open For Business: Weight Reduction

Kinja'd!!! "Nick Has an Exocet" (nickallain)
10/22/2017 at 19:36 • Filed to: None

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Hey all, I just wanted to let you know that my new Porsche tuning shop will be opening soon. We’ll be tuning the car through weight reduction. Prices start at just $1000 per pound taken out. Seriously - I don’t mind the idea of a lightweight trim package, but Porsche is charging $11k to lose 11 lbs. WTF.

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DISCUSSION (11)


Kinja'd!!! Wacko > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 19:55

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Carbon fibre is expensive.


Kinja'd!!! Wacko > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 19:55

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Carbon fibre is expensive.


Kinja'd!!! CB > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 20:02

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“We want a more no-frills Porsche!”

“Great, that’ll be an extra $11k.”

“Wait, no, we meant we wanted one with less stuff for cheaper!”

“Cheap...er? What’s that?”

Anyway, the armchair enthusiasts are gonna be upset. I’ll just take a base-spec 911 with some options and call it a day.


Kinja'd!!! TheRealBicycleBuck > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 20:15

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The only tool in the shop.


Kinja'd!!! Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 20:19

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Kinja'd!!! Wrong Wheel Drive (41%) > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 20:41

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Glass is heavy, it should come without that. Remove hvac and radio, passenger seat is optional, maybe get rid of trunk and hood covers. That ought to save quite a bit more weight for no cost.


Kinja'd!!! AestheticsInMotion > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 20:43

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I am somewhat shocked that the lightest model they make can’t even get under 3000lbs


Kinja'd!!! gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 21:44

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I have a subscription service. You pay me $50 a week, i chase you with a knife on a segway. Garrantee total weight loss of driver and car will be less than 11 pounds.*

*note: results may vary. Not responsible for any bodily harm or damage. Please read the full waiver before signing.


Kinja'd!!! FTTOHG Has Moved to https://opposite-lock.com > Nick Has an Exocet
10/22/2017 at 22:17

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To be fair it looks like it is coming with at least $5k in options over a base 911 in the wheels, seats, and PASM. So it’s more like $500 per pound. What we all really want is the return of the 912. Even the “base” 911 has gotten so fast it’s absurd. Toss the 2.0L turbo 4 from the 718 into it and it would be under 3,000 lb and still get to 60 in a hair under 5 seconds. I bet it would be a blast to drive and the starting price could be around $80k. Of course if they actually did it hey would make it some sort of special edition 911 for $120k


Kinja'd!!! Nick Has an Exocet > FTTOHG Has Moved to https://opposite-lock.com
10/22/2017 at 22:51

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I’m shocked that hasn’t happened for EU regulations.


Kinja'd!!! StndIbnz, Drives a MSRT8 > FTTOHG Has Moved to https://opposite-lock.com
10/23/2017 at 08:11

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No one wants a 912......