You dont need to be an HOA douche to be a douche

"OPPOsaurus WRX" (opposaurus)
10/05/2017 at 21:28 • Filed to: None

MY uncle gave me a ride on about 3 weeks ago. I ordered a blade drive belt, as they are not stocked at Sears. ! week later its on but it wont fire up. Ive been f’in around with it since then unsucessfully. Aparently one of my neighbors is not happy with my lawn care schedule. Yes it certainly needs to be mowed. Is it this bad tho? no. That person can go groom my nutsack.

DISCUSSION (42)

ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable) > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:32

If they are so displeased, I would invite them to mow it themselves.

WilliamsSW > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:34

Welp, it looks like you’re gonna be too busy to fix that ride on any time soon now...

crowmolly > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:35

This is where you frame the letter, hang it on a tree in front of the house, and hang the broken part underneath it with a note that says “here’s why”.

Wacko > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:36

Wtf is wrong with people. I take care of my lawn. Some of my neighbors not as much as I do. But I don’t give a shit. It makes mine look even better. Go tell her you are doing her a favor in not doing it.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Wacko
10/05/2017 at 21:42

I would have it cut if i had a running mower. I finally got my push mower running tonight but it was too late to cut. I really wanted to get the ride on going but that thing is being a BEAST.

OPPOsaurus WRX > ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
10/05/2017 at 21:42

If I knew who did it I would write back with that offer.

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:47

Reply back: “mind your own property and eat farts you infantile pillock”

AestheticsInMotion > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:48

There’s always one HOA douche

benjrblant > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:49

Kinja'd!!!

OPPOsaurus WRX > unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins)
10/05/2017 at 21:49

That would be enjoyable as well however I’d rather offer them the chance to do it themselves.

DipodomysDeserti > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:51

When you fix your mower, mow your lawn in your underwear as a display of defiance. There’s are few things I truly hate, but passive aggressive people are one of them.

Scary__goongala! > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:53

Lol’d at groom my nutsack

Chariotoflove > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 21:57

Does your HOA have a FB page? Post a version of this on it and make them feel bad. Maybe leave out the nutsack bit. Maybe.

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 22:00

A co-worker of mine is about to lose her townhouse, a place she’s lived in since 1999, over about $1K in unpaid HOA fees (now $7K because of the HOA’s legal fees). Unless I’m stupid-rich and live in some fancy neighborhood I will never purchase a home in an area with an HOA as I just cannot see the benefit (maintaining property values is such a cop-out, and the thing most cited by these obnoxious busybodies). I’d rather deal with the revolving door neighbors in the Section 8 place next door as well as all the gunfire and break-ins than have to deal with the self-righteous pricks that seem to be in charge of most HOAs.

Tripper > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 22:10

Wow what a fuckhead! I’d def let it go an extra week or 3 just for kicks

XJDano > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 22:12

Assholes done have the guts to sign it.

When I moved where I am now (short sale, great deal) and meet my neighbor for the first time he mentioned how good of a guy the previous owner was 3-5 times. I toned him out. Then they moved in a few months.

I latter found out he (previous owner) abused his wife, she did leave, then got into drugs & prostitution, had a baby from her pimp dude, and in and out of jail. Dude was a firefighter or something.

Didn’t you have you’re whole backyard dug up for septic reasons? I bet they were thrilled with that.

Laminate sign, staple to stake, park broken mower next to stake, lean cardboard or plywood sign on lawnmower saying: when this gets fixed I’ll finish the yard.

Or do absolutely nothing. I had a buddy post a photo years ago on FB that his grass was taller then the citation for having tall grass.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Tripper
10/05/2017 at 22:20

there is a part of me that really wants to but there is also a part of me that is sick of the tall grass

notsomethingstructural > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 22:22

Let it grow another week then mow “go fuck yourself” in it

OPPOsaurus WRX > XJDano
10/05/2017 at 22:25

yea i want to let it grow, but the kids play out there. The septic was done before i moved in in June. Most of it turned into crab grass. I have suspicions of who sent it and I’ve heard they don’t like how the neighborhood is turning over to younger families so they are considering moving. I want to drop a note in there mail box that says some thing ‘lets play the passive aggressive game’ and see how quickly they respond.

OPPOsaurus WRX > notsomethingstructural
10/05/2017 at 22:26

i dunno if my yard is that big. a penis would be do-able.

OPPOsaurus WRX > DipodomysDeserti
10/05/2017 at 22:29

i never put the toilet seat down at my old office (cuz it was nasty and i didnt want to touch it). One day the secretary complained to me about it, cuz she said it was nasty and didn;t want to touch it to put it down. When she got in in the mornings she would go straight up and use the bathroom, so I would go crop dust it about 10 minutes before her usual arrival.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Chariotoflove
10/05/2017 at 22:30

o no no no. There is no HOA. This is just some person.

notsomethingstructural > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 22:30

How about just “fuck you”

OPPOsaurus WRX > AestheticsInMotion
10/05/2017 at 22:30

I’m not in a HOA.

There’s always one douche

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 22:33

I like the mow a penis idea.

My neighbors have a $1M house, perfect lawn. The deer eat our grass and not theirs.

Steve in Manhattan > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 22:34

That stationery indicates serious mental problems. My Saturday routine used to be pulling my CRX Si onto my lawn and washing it while I listened to Car Talk. Old German guy toddles up and says: “Ze property values!” I think I only used “fuck” twice.

My bird IS the word > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 23:24

I have one. at my old job, My boss worked out of his house, so I used to have to park there to pick up the work truck. I parked on a part of the street that had no houses on that side for me to inconvenience. One day I get an angry note on my windshield. apparently, I was pissing off the person across the street, who just moved in. I had actually been parking there longer than they were living there. This was also a public street in the suburbs where street parking is perfectly legal.

There is always one asshole.

Rico > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/05/2017 at 23:59

Lol just take the same note they gave you and stick it in their mailbox.

Rico > My bird IS the word
10/06/2017 at 00:02

I would’ve kept the note and posted it on my windshield every time I parked there like a parking placard. I would love to see the person come with a new note only to see the old one open on the dash.

My bird IS the word > Rico
10/06/2017 at 00:23

Ironically, my boss bought the house next door to his, so I started parking there lol. Apparently there were words exchanged.

Chariotoflove > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 00:24

Sorry you have to deal with dill holes like that.

Eggplant > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 01:14

You know, you really should get on that. Everyone knows that it’s the LAWNS that make neighbourhoods nice, and not the people.

Now, I know that sometimes super long grass can make a push mower clog up and be unhappy. Maybe as a stopgap, you could get some manual hand tools. Like a scythe. I suppose if your neighbour is that concerned with appearances, you’d have to use it when they can’t see you doing it. After all, you can’t go around making the neighbourhood look like it was infested with medieval peasants, right? Maybe go after it gets dark. Let’s say, around midnight? Now, seeing as it’s starting to get a little chilly, you’ll want to bundle up. A cloak might be just the ticket. Make sure you get one with a hood to keep out the cold wind. And after you’re done, perhaps you’d consider being a good neighbour, and doing your neighbour’s lawn as well. You DID mention that they’re older. We should be doing nice things for our elders, after all. Just make sure you do it on a regular basis.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 01:39

This is better than my neighbor, they once paid their lawn care guy to mow my lawn! The worst part is they have him cut their lawn super short, so that they don’t have to have him mow it every week.

So they paid some one to mow my lawn, and mow it to short. Grass needs shade to grow. For about a month after my lawn wasn’t its usual nice dark green. It looks almost as bad as theirs.

BIGBLOCK472 - wide and bizarre > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 02:16

Many better ways to handle this, including “Hey I noticed that your grass is atypically tall and your yard isn’t as groomed savannah you normally keep it. If your mower is out of commission I could help you get it fixed?”

The letter you actually got would make me eschew mowing ever again except for yearly hay bailing activities.

Tripper > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 07:34

Yea I’d be kicking myself if I actually did that. Our yard is large enough to warrant a ride on but I’ve got a push mower. If I went 6 weeks I’d have to have a landscaper cut it before I could.

dsigned001 - O.R.C. hunter > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 07:35

Freaking retirees with nothing better to do than manicure their lawns (and bitch at those of us who have kids and a job).

OPPOsaurus WRX > Tripper
10/06/2017 at 07:44

I have both a push and a ride on. Its a larger yard, but now thats its a bit taller, its going to be a PITA. I finally got the pusher running, but not the ride on. I’ll probably first do the side opposite the person who I suspect wrote it. That other side might take too long for one day.

OPPOsaurus WRX > dsigned001 - O.R.C. hunter
10/06/2017 at 07:44

thats exactly it. The people I suspect wrote this are retired, and mow thier lawn twice a week.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 08:24

Wow, dude. If I ever found out who wrote that, I’d shit on their doorstep.

jonny11quest > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 11:31

Haha I think we have the same neighbors. They keep offering to let me use their sprinkler. Finally the other day she kept at me about watering it, how it was going to die, how it used to be one of the nicest lawns, etc etc. I just kept saying uh huh and was going about my business when she asked point blank, so are you going to water it? I said probably not. I live in the Midwest, my lawn isn’t going to turn into the sahara just because it doesn’t rain for a couple weeks.

OPPOsaurus WRX > jonny11quest
10/06/2017 at 12:12

i wish i could reply and tell them I an too busy dealing with the floor that the stupid shit of a dog who peed all over the carpet and the old bitch who let it soak into the hardwood below, ruining the floor and allowing mold to grow.

CaptDale - is secretly British > OPPOsaurus WRX
10/06/2017 at 17:23

I would let it over grow and post the note on a sign in the yard with a big FU