My First Autocross Was In A Borrowed Porsche

"Andrew Fails" (fails)
04/27/2016 at 20:45 • Filed to: autocross, SCCA, Porsche, 944

About a week ago, I got an unexpected early morning message from a man I’d spoken to, but never met in person.

“ Hey man, still interested in some early 944 fun/shooting?”

Now I don’t know about you, but when someone offers me a chance to spend some time with a vintage Porsche, I agree first, and ask questions later. The owner in this instance had read some of my other reviews, and even knew the owners of some of those cars, so an unspoken understanding was already there. I figured it would proceed in the usual fashion: we’d meet in some forlorn parking lot at a depressing hour, I’d tear around on the street for an hour or so, snap some photos, and send him on his way. If that sounds like an odd way to spend a morning, it is.

The usual hashing out of scheduling began, which is always the complicated part. At any given point, I’m working on at least one side project, in addition to a full time job, all while trying to ensure that my girlfriend doesn’t leave me for my cat. That’s not a joke. It’s a serious concern. I intended to get something on the books for the Porsche, but there was no rush. I’m behind on work, and spring is just beginning, so we have many months of good driving weather left. But as we were discussing his SCCA schedule, the bomb dropped.

“ If you’d like to co-drive my car on Sunday you’re welcome to do so.”

Flogging sports cars on the street is certainly fun, but there are severe concessions made in the name of safety and staying out of jail. But on the track, I’d be allowed to drive as fast as I was physically capable of, without regard for other motorists, pedestrians, or police. Previously, I was intrigued. Now, I was enthralled. A Porsche, on a closed track, in !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . How could I say no?

But then I remembered that I’ve never even spectated an autocross event. And I’d never seen the car in person. So, race an unknown car, in a type of event I know nothing about, on a track I’ve never seen, while the owner sits next to me? Also, the only rear wheel drive auto I’ve ever owned were some Ford Rangers back in high school and college. Both of which I totaled. Oh. This might actually be a bit more interesting than I originally planned on.

I know most autocross events just take place in parking lots, but this might be the one area in which Kansas City’s motorsports scene is better than some of our rival cities. Here, we have a web of paved lanes, that are then adjusted with a few cones to finalize the layout. This means there are actually grass runoff areas, different pavement materials, and even some very minor elevation changes. Picture it as a series of four way intersections, that you close certain arms of, to create a route.

Aerial view of our track

So I headed down there, at the crack of dawn on a Sunday, with the sole goal of not breaking the car, and hopefully not embarrassing myself too badly. Luckily, we were scheduled to run in the third and final heat of the day. The downside of that was I would be spending a full eight hours at the track, and I hate spending that much time anywhere I’m not getting paid. But the upside was I would get many hours to watch and learn. The first heat I would just be learning, and trying to talk my way into any and all available passenger seats. The second heat, I would be a corner worker out on the track (complete with my own super stylish orange safety vest). Finally, in the third heat, I’d be taking the wheel.

I’ve thought about getting involved in autocross for a while, as it’s something I can get into without driving four hours, and also is (theoretically) a bit safer. Plus, my Cooper S is an incredibly popular autocross car. The man working the gate even attempted to talk me into it when I checked in to get my wristband. So obviously, the first car I talked my way into was a lightly modified Cooper S. Sure, this wouldn’t really be applicable to racing a rear wheel drive Porsche, but it would at least show me the track, and let me know what running my own Mini would be like.

Like every enthusiast, I like to think I’m a quick driver. I’ve been driving my Mini for a couple years, and like to believe that I’ve gotten pretty good at hustling it around. I’ve waxed poetically about the agile chassis on multiple occasions, and how it can play right on the grip threshold with ease. That was before I buckled myself into a car driven by an SCCA champion. His Mini only had a few bolt-ons, with some minor suspension work, so it was still very close to stock.

After the first corner, I no longer thought I was a quick driver. I was entirely unprepared for how fast you had to drive the car. Every single corner we entered, I was convinced we could not possibly stay on the pavement and out of the weeds. It didn’t have much in the way of straight line acceleration, but it just never slowed down. This was the definition of a “momentum” car. I now understood what drivers meant when they mentioned driving at 10/10ths. If that was 10/10ths, I’ve never driven above 5 or 6. Full aggression, at or beyond the limits of the tires, the entire time. My mind was blown. I couldn’t even pay attention to the course, because the physical sensations were so overwhelming.

After that, I bummed rides in a few other cars, just to get a feel for the course, and for the speed. Then was working the course, which sounds much more complicated than it is. Basically, I stood next to the hairpin, and replaced cones that people knocked over. Pick up cone, gesture to an official that a cone went down, replace cone. Oh, also try to not get killed by the Mustang on Hoosiers when it locks up its brakes and overshoots the corner.

To make things more complicated, I managed to lose my eyeglasses while working the course. So I wound up being out in the grass way longer than expected, before needing to run to the Johnny on the Spot for the important pre-race piss. I was going to be terrified anyways, and the last thing I needed to do was soil myself in the driver’s seat. By the time I got done hunting for my glasses (which I did not find), and using the facilities (which were fairly unpleasant), the parade lap was beginning. So I ran the width of the parking lot, grabbed my helmet from my co-driver, and jumped in the 944. This was my first time sitting in the driver’s seat.

It was also my first time driving the circuit, in any configuration, in any vehicle. I had walked around it twice, and been a passenger three times, but that’s hardly preparation for doing it myself. I even managed to miss a cone on the parade lap. This didn’t exactly bode well for running it at speed.

After that inauspicious start, it was back to the staging lanes. For those of you, like me, who are new to autocross, how it works is you do a lap, then pull in and park, wait five to ten minutes, and then go out again. For me, I was sharing the 944 with the owner, so we had to alternate laps. The affect that these random pauses have on your mind is fairly bizarre. I would stand around and make small talk for roughly ten minutes, then sit in the passenger seat for a hot lap, then stand around for another ten minutes. After roughly twenty minutes of doing nothing, I suddenly had to switch my brain into full attack mode, flog the Porsche as hard as I could, then go back to killing time. The wild swings of adrenaline were difficult to process, and lead to a lot of the afternoon being a blur.

So here’s what I do remember. My first lap at speed involved an instructor riding shotgun with me to give me a bit of guidance. He seemed slightly nervous about the fact that my first time driving the car had been the parade lap and that I’d never competed in autocross. Some people have no sense of adventure.

But that went very smoothly, if a bit slow. He did question me after the fact, saying “I thought you’d never done this before?” To which I had to reply, “It’s my first time doing autocross, it’s not my first time driving fast.” Now, there’s a reasonable chance he was just trying to build up the confidence of a helpless rookie. But obviously, he was just dazzled by my sheer raw talent. Disregard the fact that my co-driver was nearly ten seconds faster than me.

As for the 944 itself, it was amazing. Not a fast car, or even particularly quick, but like all great cars, it talks to you. Even on my first hot lap, I felt entirely comfortable letting the car slide out wide in the sweeper, and then lifting off the gas to get the nose to tuck back in for the slalom. Sure, I didn’t have enough experience to really test the limits of the car, but at no point did it surprise or frighten me.

I was too distracted by trying to keep the speed up to really delve into the nuances, but the fact that I was turning quasi-respectable laps with less than two minutes of seat time under my belt says the whole story. Similar to the legendary Miata (which everyone in the class was driving except us), the 944 teaches you to refine your craft. You’re never going to get ahead by sheer power or grip, but instead you need to conserve momentum and carry speed wherever you can. Push your limits, trust the car, and you will be surprised at how far beyond your expectations you can go.

As for the dramatic, dirt throwing photo here… Well, let’s just say I never quite got the hang of the hairpin at the end of the high speed section. I was always trying to eke out a bit more oomph before getting on the brakes, and always overcooked it. As with all of this, it comes down to needing to fully trust the machine. I never was able to really stamp the brake down as hard and fast as needed. There’s a degree of trust that your build with a vehicle as you slowly tease out each other’s limits. Just like with your college girlfriend, you need to try a finger before you cram it in there.

At the end of a very long day, how did I feel about my first autocross? Well, first of all, I’m slow. Like, really slow. I mean, you can watch the video for yourself. That was the final lap. The driving was an unbelievable rush, and it taught me to get more comfortable driving beyond the traction limit. I started to learn how hard a car can be pushed, and how to try and reign it back in. That being said, the amount of seat time you get compared to the length of the day is laughably poor. If I didn’t share a car, I would have had eight minutes of race time, out of an eight hour day.

I understand that this may be region specific. Our event had 150 cars enter, which as I understand it, is way higher than other regions. But because (as I often lament) we don’t have any easily accessible race tracks, anyone who is remotely interested in racing comes out. So everyone needs to get their runs in, plus has to do their time working the course. But still, a full day, and fifty dollars, for less than ten minutes of racing is a tough pill to swallow.

I say all this now, and bemoan how unfair it is, and what a poor deal it is, but then I look at my Mini in the garage.

You know, it might look real nice with a number placard on the doors.

And Will keeps telling us to !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! .

And I’ve already got a Snell rated helmet.

And the track is only twenty minutes from my house.

Fuck.

(All photos courtesy of Reuben Samuels of !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! )

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

Fails is a freelance photographer who sometimes pretends to be literate. You can follow him on !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! or see his portfolio !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . He is talking in third person because it makes him feel mysterious.

DISCUSSION (100)

Josh > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:31

Autocross is super fun at first and extremely frustrating to get better than “decent” at. Hasn’t stopped me from coming back, though.

James May is my spirit animal > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:34

Great article. Say goodbye to your wallet when those new tires come in, and you start looking for goodies and mods. <3

SmugAardvark > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:36

Honestly, not a terrible run at all. Sure, it could be smoother in parts, and there were a couple moments where you were coasting for a smidge too long. But given that it was your first try, and not even in your own car? Definitely nothing to be ashamed of. I’ve been doing Solo 2 and HPDE’s for over a decade now and I’m still looking for ways to improve.

150 cars is a lot more than I’m used to at a local event, that’s for sure. Depending on how your region operates (if they do 2-day events), it might be better for you to do a Saturday instead. Practice days, for me at least, usually yield more seat time. More runs means I’m more likely to try out new driving lines and techniques, without worrying about “wasting” a lap.

Bunty Brown > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:36

You had me at borrowed Porsche.

Zillon > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:37

Kinja'd!!!

Yeah, you should totally autocross that MINI. They’re quite fun.

(Also, Mini = classic Mini, MINI = new MINI.)

RyanFrew > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:37

Nice! Did they already have a photographer there? In a lot of regions, one or two guys will skip their corner responsibility in exchange for taking photos. Win-win. Everyone likes the pics and the person taking shots presumably enjoys it more than standing on a corner.

I race an r53 Mini Cooper S. I also have a black ‘89 NA 944. So this was a funny article. You should definitely give the Mini a shot. It’ll give you new perspective on the car when you’re behind the wheel. What mods did the guy have? Pulleys? Sway bars? Exhaust? The Mini is a fun autox car, but it actually isn’t very competitive in most classes...

Gripevo1 > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:52

Welcome to the family lol.

Seriously autocross is the most addictive activity ive ever been involved in. Loads of fun and super competitive.

Kinja'd!!!

- #7 FS :)

MrPrevention > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:55

Great article. I love the bits about how you thought you were a good driver before you tried autoX. When I started (much like your story, as most would attest to as well), I had the best time ever being horribly slow and sloppy. It opened my eyes to a whole new level of car control and technique that was available with some practice. I’m no national pro now, mind you but after 3yrs I have grown my skills EXPONENTIALLY. It’s the best way to spend 35 bucks on a sunday.

Andrew Fails > RyanFrew
04/28/2016 at 09:56

Yeah, they had a few photographers working the event. These were done by the boys at www.AWOLsystems.com .

Not sure what all was done to the Mini. I think he said coil overs, catback, tune, etc. Relatively minor stuff.

Paullubbock > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 09:58

The finger? Did you really need to go there? Ok, but don’t say I didn’t warn you if Jezebel jumps all over your ass.

Andrew Fails > Paullubbock
04/28/2016 at 09:59

When things get too serious, I feel the need to squeeze in an off-color comment.

SirPoopyPants > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:01

Good read.

Autocross is one of those things that is way harder than it looks to do well. I did it once about 10 years ago. I thought I would be good at it since I raced on 2 wheels, boy was I in for a shock. I’d like to get back into it, but unfortunately I’d need a 3rd car to do it as my daily is a SUV and my toy, a ‘67 912, ain’t exactly up to snuff (unfortunate because Mrs. Poopy would murder me in my sleep if I got a 3rd car).

MoparMap > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:02

Oh, also try to not get killed by the Mustang on Hoosiers when it locks up its brakes and overshoots the corner.

It’s always those Mustangs. Are you sure he wasn’t aiming for you?

MoparMap > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:03

Okay, where is this in KC? I live close enough and have been trying to find some autocross events nearby. A few members in the Viper club have asked about it as well. That track looks like it could be a lot of fun.

Andrew Fails > MoparMap
04/28/2016 at 10:07

Check out the KC SCCA site or Facebook page. This place is next to one of the Metropolitan Community Colleges (maybe Blue River) out off of 23rd St/78 Hwy , just west of Truman Rd.

BeaterGT > Paullubbock
04/28/2016 at 10:07

It’s just good advice really.

Stang70Fastback > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:07

Just don't let your insurance company know you autocross... *sigh*

budget_crx > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:08

The precision driving course KC has is an awesome facility! I do remember there being tons of goose turds all over though, which made the course a bit slick haha.

Because of the costs and like of seat time like you mentioned, i feel autocross is only really fun when you are in a competitive class. I had a blast running against others in a stock class, but when I moved to XP in an almost stock CRX, it lost a lot of fun. The pax was horrible for street tire class and I was running against purposely built R compound, tube chassis machines. Spending $50 to get a few minutes of seat time and a guarantee to get spanked by faster cars was not so fun.

I do recommend doing several events to anyone though, there are driving skills that you pick up at autocrossing you can’t easily learn anywhere else.

Arrivederci > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:12

Nice write-up! I’ve only started autocrossing over the last year and am pretty much addicted now. I sold my “performance” wheel/tire setup because it wasn’t competitive enough for my class, so I’m buying something better. It’s nice that your group offers a parade lap. We get to walk it and then are expected to start running hot.

PilotRPI > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:14

You don’t need a fast car to have fun. In college someone used an 80s RWD Toyota Cressida and turned in some impressive times simply because he knew how to drive and handle his particular car.

Rick Cavaretti > James May is my spirit animal
04/28/2016 at 10:15

No mods in a street stock class or whatever they call it these days. Twenty years ago, my car fell in DSP.

RyanFrew > Gripevo1
04/28/2016 at 10:25

Especially fun if you drive a car that totally dominates its class ;) Nice choice.

Andrew Fails > Arrivederci
04/28/2016 at 10:37

The parade lap helped so much.

Gripevo1 > RyanFrew
04/28/2016 at 10:38

I wish that was the case. The 16 camaro is now that car. And actually, the nationals event i did at crows landing last weekend was won by an EB mustang(which means nothing since the driver is one of the best autocrossers around, Mark Scroggs).Also the e9x m3's are still winning many major events.

BubbleKing > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:40

After the first corner, I no longer thought I was a quick driver. I was entirely unprepared for how fast you had to drive the car.

This.

You just cannot drive anywhere close to the limit on the street with any reasonable expectation of safety. This is why enthusiasts really need to pursue autocross and track days, so they become educated on performance driving in a relatively safe environment.

t0ast > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:40

Nice write-up. Sounds about right for your first go, especially in someone else’s car. I just got started myself very late last year and am pretty well hooked at this point. It’s a long day for sure, but the price is mostly reasonable for being the only game in town and the people have been good to talk and occasionaly ride with. The facility definitely makes for some interesting challenges with the surface/camber varieties you mentioned along that big sweeper on the north end being a bit sketchy.

I was running Heat 2 that day in the black NC Miata in Novice STR class. I was mostly happy with my fastest run (2nd/18 place in Novice PAX, 59th/150 overall), save for the hairpin. If it’s any consolation, it wasn’t particularly kind to me that day either. This being my 3rd event, a lot more things are beginning to click, though I still have a good amount to learn (as evidenced by getting beaten by 8 of 11 of the drivers in my car’s “base” class of CS) and REALLY need to find myself a LSD to replace my NC’s open diff.

Andrew Fails > t0ast
04/28/2016 at 10:46

Haha, glad to hear the hairpin caught other people out as well.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:49

I know Joe

RyanFrew > Gripevo1
04/28/2016 at 10:50

Yeahhhh I was afraid that would happen with the Camaro. My region hasn’t really gotten after it yet, so I’m still kind of in the dark. The average driver will do best with an e9x M3. A good driver will prefer the Mustang, though, imo...and now the Camaro. Winning an AutoX classat Nationals with a solid rear axle is the stuff of legends.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > RyanFrew
04/28/2016 at 10:52

The Mustang dominating FS?

nope

RyanFrew > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
04/28/2016 at 10:52

Last season, 15/16 Mustangs were CRUSHING F-Street.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > RyanFrew
04/28/2016 at 10:54

Nope.... E92 M3 and Camaro 1LE are the real FS hammers... The S550 has shit gearing and tire limitations to stay competitive.

I know, I competed in FS at a few National SCCA events (including Nationals, but I was in GS at Nationals)

Andrew Fails > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
04/28/2016 at 10:57

He's a good guy.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 10:58

That’s not debatable!

Skamanda > t0ast
04/28/2016 at 11:00

Was that autocross announcing coming over your car stereo at the end, there?

t0ast > Skamanda
04/28/2016 at 11:03

Yes, the timing trailer has its own low-power FM broadcast in addition to the loudspeakers. I try to remember to turn it on at the end of the run since the timing setup occasionally malfunctions and they also call out penalties, reruns, etc.

jcm055 > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:06

Not bad for your first time! I look back at my early videos and think “Ew was I that bad?!” You should keep it up, no matter the car you drive it’s fun. Heck I’m campaigning a stock Civic Si right now while I finish my SMF monster and it’s just as fun, albeit at a slower pace than I’m used to.

The other thing with autoX is it teaches you to learn quick or be forever slow. Most regions run a different course every event so you have to be able to recognize parts you’ve seen before and string them together, since you should never see the same course twice.

James May is my spirit animal > Rick Cavaretti
04/28/2016 at 11:06

Not even stiffening suspension/etc?

Complete newb, not being sarcastic.

t0ast > James May is my spirit animal
04/28/2016 at 11:19

If I remember right, all the Street class cars can get is post-cat exhaust hardware, shocks, one sway bar replacement, and wheels/tires (restricted by treadwear rating and stock wheel sizes).

Dr. Strangeland > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:22

Wait, working the course wasn’t fun? I went to my first autocross a week ago and I used my time working the course before my run group to memorize the back section of the course. I know it saved me a few seconds when I could just go for it back there rather than trying to remember the track layout.

I hope you go back, that track looks fantastic. Here we have a novice class that you can run whatever you have provided it doesn’t have race tires. Then there’s an intermediate street tire class with similar rules that you can run in for two seasons. It’s a very logical progression.

I know I’m going back, my car isn’t competitive (yet?) but being able to go sideways, legitimately, for five whole minutes was worth fifty bucks and any amount of sunburn.

cdydatzigs > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:25

God I love the proportions of those Porsches.

Thrashy > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:27

Welcome to the cult in KC — and yeah, last event was a bit of an outlier, you may have heard our registration chair say that we would have run a extra heat if he could have predicted the number of walk-up registrations. Shagging cones for 1.5-2 hours while you wait for 200+ runs to be completed isn’t much fun, but this year has been a record setting one for the club in terms of turnout and we’re going to have to figure out how to deal with that.

Thrashy > t0ast
04/28/2016 at 11:31

CS is a very strong class in our region. I co-drive with the guy who won the last event, and he placed 2nd in the shifter kart class at Nationals not long ago. I’m learning a lot from the telemetry data I get from his runs — he’s on the gas sooner, stays on it longer, and runs tighter lines than I do. I’m happy to be midpack this year as opposed to a backmarker, though, at a mere 1.5 seconds behind him. Baby steps!

NeonBlaqk > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:34

I find autox turns into as much of a social occasion as anything else. I first got into it a few months after I moved to where I am now and it made for a reasonably quick little social circle. You’re kind of paying for a place to hang out and have fun as much as race. It can certainly be an overload your first time, but by and large, people are more than happy to help. You just have to ask questions and be open to the answers. The owner of that Porsche had more balls than I do though. I’m usually happy to take on a co-driver, but I have to know you, have seen you drive, and you have to test drive the car on some twisties first.

STATICFRICTION > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:37

Thank you so much for sharing this! :D

Little Black Coupe Turned Silver > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:39

I was going to write you a nice comment about welcome to autox and whatnot, but instead I quit reading when I got to that sentence.

Andrew Fails > Dr. Strangeland
04/28/2016 at 11:48

I didn't care for working the course. The driving was great, and the ride along were fun, but just standing and watching was not that exciting for me.

MoparMap > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:50

Ah man, that’s the complete opposite side of KC from what I was hoping. I’m in Lawrence, so that would be a bit of an early morning haul to make it out there. Shame it isn’t on the west side of KC. Looks like they run Heartland Park a few times too though, which is more on my side of things. That MCC track looks really fun though... I’ll have to try to make it out there at least once (I’d be in a silver 2004 Viper most likely if you see me).

Andrew Fails > Thrashy
04/28/2016 at 11:50

If there's a change in the structure, that would definitely lead to me be more interested.

Andrew Fails > NeonBlaqk
04/28/2016 at 11:51

Haha, yeah, it was a bit of a trial by fire.

t0ast > Thrashy
04/28/2016 at 11:53

Admittedly, I did feel a bit less bad about comparing to CS after seeing that more than half finished in the top 30 overall (and I assume you’re amongst them, so congrats on the solid finish). There definitely seems to be no shortage of talent in that class. Still, given the lack of STR drivers here (me + 1 so far), it should make for a good challenge to pursue as I learn and get my hardware more into line.

Andrew Fails > MoparMap
04/28/2016 at 11:54

Yeah, I think Heartland Park is next. And if you want me to co-drive the Viper, I'm down for that. Haha

carzcarzcarz > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 11:55

we were scheduled to run in the third and final heat of the day. The downside of that was I would be spending a full eight hours at the track

This is why I don’t like AutoX, so much time waiting around just to run 4 or 5 times. 8 Hours for a couple minutes of seat time is horrible compared to other forms of motorsports. But it is a great way to get started, and I try talking all my friends into going if they’ve never done any type of racing.

Lately I’ve gotten into drifing instead, and the local drift group has started having a combined autox/drift events. It’s not sanctioned for points or anything, but you get a ton more seat time, and they are starting to time the autocrossers so they get some more feedback.

carzcarzcarz > Thrashy
04/28/2016 at 12:02

Hope you figure something out, as we have a similar problem at the Houston events. We switch tracks which are located all around the city, which helps as some people don’t want to drive an hour+ to race. There is one actual track (instead of the usual parking lots) that we get to run on once a year, and that event is always packed. You can expect to spend a full day to go there and reduced number of runs to facilitate the amount of people that show up. During the summer months, at times we have switched to night racing on Friday or Saturday to beat the heat.

Wrong Wheel Drive (41%) > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 12:06

Parade laps sound pretty nifty, I feel like that would help a lot. I usually always try to get in 4 to 5 course walks at a minimum but that first run always feels like I have no idea what is going on. Its only my second season of autox though and I never go off course at least so I guess it is just the learning curve. Anyways, I find it pretty crazy how much autox can vary from region to region. Some will have 100+ cars entered with $50 entry fees and others will be $30 with 60 or so cars. Then you have the airport runway style of course with long straightaways and then other parking lot style courses with no straights at all. I enjoy it all but my Miata is certainly better suited for the tighter courses lol.

Pengwynn > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 12:08

Hey Andrew, I just wanted to say I think this is one of the better articles I’ve read on Jalopnik in quite a while. Honest, with a touch of lowbrow humor, and ample use of spell-check.

Part of AutoX events is enjoying the variety of cars ripping past at full chat, and meeting new people with some common interest. The non-seat time isn’t a waste IMO.

AutocrossTransAm > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 12:12

Nice article. I love this paragraph, sums up a first timer’s experience perfectly: After the first corner, I no longer thought I was a quick driver......

Thrashy > carzcarzcarz
04/28/2016 at 12:13

There’s been discussion of a fourth heat to keep work assignments shorter. If we can still have 30+ drivers per heat there’s still enough workers to go around, and 120 runs per heat is much less of a time commitment than 200. If we don’t add a course walk period, we can turn over a heat in 15 to 20 minutes, so it wouldn’t add too much time to the event overall.

Andrew Fails > Wrong Wheel Drive (41%)
04/28/2016 at 12:19

Ours was 150 cars, and cost me $48. But yeah, parade lap helped a ton. I did two course walks, which helped, but the parade lap was even better.

Thrashy > t0ast
04/28/2016 at 12:20

By the skin of my teeth if you look at the PAX indexed results.... thanks! I’m still adjusting from running CS for the last several years in an NC Miata with 500-treadwear all seasons, so the grip takes getting used to.

Andrew Fails > Pengwynn
04/28/2016 at 12:21

I really appreciate the kind words.

I definitely see the appeal of the socializing, as it seems like everyone got along really well. I'm just not the best in social situations.

MoparMap > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 12:21

Lol, I’m still trying to figure out where it would fit. Looking over the rules section puts me at a decent disadvantage from the looks of it. I have headers and a tune, but it really wouldn’t make it that much faster than a stock car, though it would throw me into the prepared class I think if I’m reading it right. That class has way more mods allowed. Kinda like Forza where you have a car that just barely makes it into the next class up, but there is still a lot of points above that which are still within the same class. I also just have the stock roll bars, which are hit and miss with some tracks. I know there is a sticker on the car that says “these aren’t roll bars”, but in reality they are and it was just Dodge covering themselves on the legal front by putting that sticker on. I’ve asked the engineers about it and they have said they were designed to perform the same function, just maybe not as robustly as a racing car would design them.

Andrew Fails > BeaterGT
04/28/2016 at 12:33

I'm just providing a public service.

yamahog > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 12:45

That’s nice and all, but you know we would’ve accepted you all the same if you admitted you didn’t have a college girlfriend and said “my own asshole” instead.

Andrew Fails > yamahog
04/28/2016 at 12:47

I was just...checking my prostate? Uh...health and safety first!

yamahog > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
04/28/2016 at 12:47

It’ll be reallyyyy embarrassing if Travis starts putting up better times than me with his new suspension and tires...

yamahog > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 12:50

Health and safety, just icing on the cake

Kinja'd!!!

HarriH0oner > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 12:56

I love how you said you thought you were a pretty good driver until you got into the passenger seat. I had the same feeling when I went to my first track day. I did okay, but I asked my buddy who was much faster than me to take me along so I could learn his braking points and lines. We had almost identical MINI S's and JESUS! I couldn't believe how much more could be done with my little MINI. I also learned a lot about getting a set of good tires. Since my car is now out of warranty and 10yrs old, I haven't been to a track day in a while, but I need to check out some autocross. Seems like the perfect speed fix, without toasting your car too much.

Thrashy > Wrong Wheel Drive (41%)
04/28/2016 at 12:56

It’s pretty much down to how much it costs to rent the facility that the event is at. The site owners at MCC Blue River are very proud of their driver training school, and the lot fee is accordingly high. (We wish they’d use some of the money to patch the asphalt and repair the ditches, but that’s inside baseball...) Regrettably most of the the other institutions in the area that own large chunks of concrete/asphalt are either too risk-averse to rent to us, or want an intolerably high fee to do so. Smaller clubs that don’t need as vast a site for parking and grid have a better range of options when it comes to sites, and smaller/more rural lot owners tend not to be as concerned with liability issue. Though the SCCA has a very good insurance program for its clubs, there’s no getting around the FUD that a high-powered corporate attorney can spew.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > yamahog
04/28/2016 at 12:59

Just up your game then and defeat him!

I’m taking my girlfriend to an autocross on Sunday by Toledo. She’s not driving, but I think that may be changing some time in the future

yamahog > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
04/28/2016 at 13:02

I need some heavier driving shoes it seems... And have fun!

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > RyanFrew
04/28/2016 at 13:02

Good driver will prefer the Mustang? Again no. Let me give you the example of Bryan Heitkotter who destroyed FS last year at Nationals in my friend’s E92 M3. I think I remember his victory being over a second over 2nd place.

FYI (Nissan Academy Winning Driver) Bryan is far being an average driver, or even just a good driver

TooManyCarsMike > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 13:07

vintage? VINTAGE?! a 944 is now vintage?! Back in my day they were brand new. Try not to cry... cry a lot.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > yamahog
04/28/2016 at 13:07

Will do! I’m trying to decide if I’m driving my M3, a 84 911, or a MK7 GTI.

Decisions!

carzcarzcarz > Thrashy
04/28/2016 at 13:18

I’ve been to some autox events with 4 heats, and it was actually a nice setup, as they split the day up. If you were in morning group, you could leave after working (or work then run), and then the 2nd half day was left for the 3rd & 4th heat and they didn’t have to be there All day. I’ve never had a parade lap, that would be nice but I’m sure slows things down too.

chris209 > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 13:39

After the first corner, I no longer thought I was a quick driver. I was entirely unprepared for how fast you had to drive the car.

This is the exact reaction everyone has when they ride in an autocross car for the first time.

Taiso0019R > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 13:46

Nice write up Andrew. If you’d like a bit more seat time and less downtime I recommend Porsche Club of America events if there’s a local PCA chapter in your area. The field is usually much smaller and usually if you co-drive you can alternate the car between heats. Making the switching out of the car less crazy. You do your laps and then after you go out to the course to work corners your co driver runs theirs.

My wife and I had a blast co-driving our Honda at one of these events recently. We’d been watching before that but finally went ahead and ran together. Great atmosphere and everyone was willing to teach us something and bring us into the fold. No snobbery either. Being around those cars definitely made us Porsche fans too. A Cayman or 944 is definitely in our not too distant future.

Dr. Strangeland > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 13:54

I can dig that, too. It was hot, there was no shade, and by the time I got to drive I was pretty tired already. It didn’t help that we had to push someone’s M3 out of a ditch when they went four wheels off.

Next time I’m bringing a golf umbrella, I don’t care how I look.

Andrew Fails > Taiso0019R
04/28/2016 at 13:56

I just checked their website, and for the Kansas City region, there are no scheduled events for at least the next year.

I really do live in a terrible state for racing.

Ford 999 > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 14:03

The KC Porsche Club does them fairly often, I think. They had one last weekend in the Ameristar parking lot.

Ford 999 > MoparMap
04/28/2016 at 14:06

Don’t let that class thing stop you - the KC guys are great about finding a spot for everybody.

Ford 999 > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
04/28/2016 at 14:07

It has 3 different gear ratios...one of them should be good?

BaylorCamaro > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 14:30

ahhh a Mustang joke thrown in there for good measure. Well done.

MoparMap > Ford 999
04/28/2016 at 14:36

Yeah, I guess ultimately I wouldn’t really be in it for a trophy or anything, more just a fun weekend to see how fast I can go. It would just be nice to have comparable cars to go against to know if I’m in the ballpark.

GanjaTwista > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 14:38

I definitely recommend a quickly collapsing golf umbrella (unless it’s going to be windy) for the shade.

Better yet, keep going back and ask if you can learn some of the other assignments for the event: grid, timing, audit, radio, etc... Or if you can drag your ass out of the bed early enough, you might be able to work registration or tech and have your work assignment completed before competition. Though, these will require some learning and might already be filled by people with more experience (seniority).

yamahog > Ford 999
04/28/2016 at 14:40

15 GT with performance pack: 3.73

15 SS 1LE: 3.91

Andrew Fails > BaylorCamaro
04/28/2016 at 14:53

I didn't even think of the recent memes. There was just a Mustang on fat Hoosiers that kept locking up the brakes.

Thrashy > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 15:22

It gets better... the Mustang is named Cujo, and it’s as terrifying as it looks.

Warlord of Crud > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 15:43

“If I didn’t share a car, I would have had eight minutes of race time, out of an eight hour day.”

This ^ is why I finally gave up on Xcross and sold my racecar. That and the $200 in fees and gas alone. And that doesn’t cover the NT-05 tires I melted through in 1 yr, or the breakages that ended up in the tens of thousands in just 3yrs.

Limesmack > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 15:51

I thought autocross was driving in a field with some buggy contraption? At least that’s what they call autocross here

WRXforScience > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 15:55

Whenever I tell people I do autocross, they always ask how fast I go. They are always underwhelmed when I tell them I rarely exceed 60mph, so I have to explain to them that I am going 60mph in a parking lot.

Everyone who has ridden with me has been amazed at how fast it felt going below most posted speed limits. You rarely exceed 1g in cornering or braking on the street, but most autocross cars will routinely exceed 1g in both braking and acceleration at multiple points during a run.

Being the Worker Chief for my region, I often don’t even get the chance to walk the course before my first run. I’ve become accustomed to taking my first run blind while running competitive times (I’ve had my first run be my fastest run on more than one occasion). You’d be amazed at how much you will progress after a couple of seasons.

You know you are hooked when you realize you’ve bought more sets of tires in a year than pairs of shoes...I’m currently on a 2:1 tire to shoe ratio but my co-driver helps offset the costs.

Andrew Fails > WRXforScience
04/28/2016 at 15:58

I'd rather be sideways at 30 than going straight at 60.

Headphoto > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 16:20

Try your local BMW club as well, and search out other clubs. Here in Chicagoland, there’s an autocross nearly every weekend from one of the 9 clubs that host them. Some clubs get lots of runs, others have really fast courses, and others have really good training programs. It’s a bit of an addiction, but some of the lessons learned while autocrossing are invaluable on the street.

94GTratracer > Taiso0019R
04/28/2016 at 16:22

Plus, if you manage to post a better time than another car, that other car is likely a Porsche, which is a big ego boost after being schooled by the professionals with SCCA.

Kinja'd!!!

Also PCA where I lived tended to make really fast courses with lots of open sweepers, which might not be the best scenario for competition with my car, but is super fun anyway.

Spit Grtzr > Andrew Fails
04/28/2016 at 17:06

jesus, the PCA in Kansas City

christ just hang out in Mission Hills to see how painful that would be

Spit Grtzr > Thrashy
04/28/2016 at 17:08

where is this ‘track’ in KC.

I know quite a while ago SCCA auto-x was run out at the JC Penny distribution center in Lenexa or thereabouts- I don’t recognize this layout

xXxGeNeRiCxXx > t0ast
04/28/2016 at 19:25

That hairpin was on of the trickier parts of the course for sure, I thought the corner complex after the slalom was harder in my opinion. We should have a novice class hang out at the next event we all go to, I was the SVT Focus that got 1st in the novice class and I think it would be a lot of fun to talk to some other new guys.

Thrashy > Spit Grtzr
04/28/2016 at 20:03

In between then and now, we were out at the stadiums. This is the MCC Blue River Precision Driving Center, which is out on 23rd Street in Independence, east of 470.

TurtleFace > WRXforScience
04/28/2016 at 20:30

I’ve given up on finding ways to make autocross sound cool to people. You just don’t get it unless you’re actually in the car.

That said, I just raced in an SCCA National Tour event and holy f#@! did they set up a fast course! Flat out in third gear navigating a slalom at 80 mph is no joke. Loved it.

glemon > Andrew Fails
04/29/2016 at 00:40

Nice write up, I don’t think I would like autocros as much with 150 cars either. We run some through my local British car club, and we usually have about 20 people or so and break into two run groups. As mentioned, cone watching time is a great way to get faster. Watch the line the fast guys take around the course.

I was running my TR

Kinja'd!!!

But I am fixing up an old 924 to run this year.

Kinja'd!!!

I have also done one track day, which I realize is not the same as racing, but still, though you have more seat time, the rush of driving at the limit in autocross for a minute at a time or so is more fun than going around a track (straights are boring) at 9/10s, I am not good enough to do a track all out and the potential consequences are also much more severe at 90-100 mph than doing 45-50 in the auto-x.