Pucker Up

"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn) 11/28/2016 at 10:46 • Filed to: planelopnik

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A Danish Air Force MH-60R Seahawk lands in heavy seas in the North Atlantic.

Jcarr > ttyymmnn 11/28/2016 at 10:49

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More like puke ‘er up.

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > ttyymmnn 11/28/2016 at 10:55

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I would turn the sea brown

AuthiCooper1300 > ttyymmnn 11/28/2016 at 11:24

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About fixed-wing carrier landings, but still relevant as a commentary to the images above. (By Tom Wolfe, of course; from The Right Stuff, of course.)

In the training film the flight deck was a grand piece of gray geometry, perilous, to be sure, but an amazing abstract shape as one looks down upon it on the screen. And yet once the newcomer’s two feet were on it… Geometry—my God, man, this is a… skillet! It heaved, it moved up and down underneath his feet, it pitched up, it pitched down, it rolled to port (this great beast rolled!) and it rolled to starboard, as the ship moved into the wind and, therefore, into the waves, and the wind kept sweeping across, sixty feet up in the air out in the open sea, and there were no railings whatsoever. This was a skillet! —a frying pan! —a short-order grill! —not gray but black, smeared with skid marks from one end to the other and glistening with pools of hydraulic fluid and the occasional jet-fuel slick, all of it still hot, sticky, greasy, runny, virulent from God knows what traumas—still ablaze! —consumed in detonations, explosions, flames, combustion, roars, shrieks, whines, blasts, horrible shudders, fracturing impacts, as little men in screaming red and yellow and purple and green shirts with black Mickey Mouse helmets over their ears skittered about on the surface as if for their very lives (you’ve said it now! ), hooking fighter planes onto the catapult shuttles so that they can explode their afterburners and be slung off the deck in a red-mad fury with a kaboom! —a procedure that pounds through the entire deck seems absolutely controlled, orderly, sublime, however, compared to what he is about to watch as aircraft return to the ship for what is known in the engineering stoicisms of the military as “recovery and arrest”. To say that an F-4 was coming back onto this heaving barbecue from out of the sky at a speed of 135 knots… that might have been the truth in the training lecture, but it did not begin to get across the idea of what the newcomer saw from the deck itself, because it created the notion that perhaps the plane was gliding in. On the deck one knew differently! As the aircraft came closer and the carrier heaved on into the waves and the plane’s speed did not diminish and the deck did not grow steady—indeed, it pitched up and down five or ten feet per greasy heave—one experienced a neural alarm that no lecture could have prepared him for: This is not an airplane coming toward me, it is a brick with some poor sonofabitch riding it (someone much like my self!), and it is not gliding, it is falling, a thirty-thousand-pound brick, headed not for a stripe on the deck but for me—and with a horrible smash! it hits the skillet, and with a blur of momentum as big as a freight train’s it hurtles toward the far end of the deck—another blinding storm! —another roar as the pilot pushes the throttle up to full military power and another smear of rubber screams out over the skillet—and this is nominal! —quite okay! —for a wire stretched across the deck has grabbed the hook on the end of the plane as it hit the deck tail down, and the smash was the rest of the fifteen-ton brute slamming onto the deck, as it tripped up, so that it is now straining against the wire at full throttle, in case it hadn’t held and the plane had “boltered” off the end of the deck and had to struggle up into the air again. And already the Mickey Mouse helmets are running toward the fiery monster…

ttyymmnn > AuthiCooper1300 11/28/2016 at 14:37

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I need to read that book. Many times I’ve heard of an arrested landing referred to as a controlled crash. Good read. Thanks.

AuthiCooper1300 > ttyymmnn 11/28/2016 at 15:01

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Wolfe’s politics and opinions may not be exactly similar to mine (I have the same problem with PJ O’Rourke, and to a certain extent, with Hunter S. Thompson) but he does write in such a vivid, expressive way about certain subjects.

Incidentally, I understand The Right Stuff was not really very appreciated by the very same people he was portraying. I found it fascinating, nevertheless.

On a completely different subject, also by Wolfe, I suggest you have a look at The Kandy-Kolored Tangerine Flake Streamline Baby (http://isites.harvard.edu/fs/docs/icb.topic1292219.files/Week%208/Kandy%20Kolored%20by%20Tom%20Wolfe.pdf ) but I suppose you know it already.

ttyymmnn > AuthiCooper1300 11/28/2016 at 15:06

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Nope; never read anything by Wolfe. But this looks interesting. Thanks.