Here are all the things wrong with my new BMW

"Anthony Miller" (ahmille4)
11/16/2016 at 17:42 • Filed to: None

In the spirit of the recent “Here’s all the things....” posts over on the FP. I’ve decided to do one of my own, on the brand new (to me) 2002 BMW 525i Sport Wagon. Purchased for the grand total sum of $7,000! this family wagon was one of 1,696 sold that year but there are two more little wrinkles to that number; the five-speed manual and the sport package.(!!!!)

So first, a little background, for those of you who can recite E39 stats backwards and forwards yet (blah blah lah, greatest styled car known to ever grace the earth etc. etc. bmWANK). The BMW E39 “touring” body style was produced worldwide between 1996 and 2004. Coming in two flavors for the United States, the big wagon was produced with the M52B28 2.8 liter inline 6 cylinder (190 HP and 210 ft·lbf) for 1999 and 2000 and the M54B25 2.5 liter inline 6 (189 HP and 181 ft·lb) from 2001 to 2004. Why BMW decided to go with the 2.5 liter over the 3 liter M54 is a bit of a question mark, especially since we’re talking about the lower volume touring body style. Maybe they were afraid of cannibalizing the 4 liter V8 touring sales, but in my opinion it remains one of the most boneheaded decisions BMW made with the E39. (Although since it’s in the same engine family future e46 330i ZHP engine swaps are possible and actually not difficult!)

What makes these big sleds so desirable in the first place. Well, one big reason is that they could come with a 5 speed manual when most standard gearboxes were on their way out. Additionally, with the rear seats folded down, the 5-series wagon had more cargo space than the newly introduced X5. Also, being a 5 series, the car could heat your butt while you row your own gears all while swaddled in the finest leather Bavaria could find. But all that was when it was new. Now, the newest E39 touring that you can find is an astonishing 13 years old and do you know what doesn’t typically age well? That’s right, a “modern” BMW. After the late 80's, when BMW really started to move up-market, they solidly positioned themselves in the “do not own once out of warranty,” bracket.

So is my Bimmer a Basketcase? Well, I decided to do my own cursory check and then take it in for an inspection just to make sure I paid WAY too much money on the used market.

For those of you nerds who like build sheets, here it is.

NERDS

HOLY CRAP! While I don’t mean for this to sound like a #humblebrag, it’s going to anyway. This particular car was optioned to the nines but none of that means squat unless it was maintained. Especially since there are over 180,000 miles on the clock.

So let’s get started!

!!! UNKNOWN HEADER TYPE (MULTI-LINE BREAK?) !!!

This vent doesn’t seem to want to stay in the dash.

The interior is in pretty great shape for being 14 years old and having a butt in the front seat for 180,000 miles. But of course, the Little Things are out in force.

Pictured is the main dash vent, which seems to want to vacate it’s location every time I hit a small imperfection in the road.

But that sets the tone for the interior which means we may be on track for death by a thousand cuts. Everything looks clean, but underneath, there is where the gremlins hide. The following is an exhaustive list of the “niggles.”

Passenger seat doesn’t raise up and down evenly, (sometimes referred to as “seat twist” by the faithful)

Drivers window regulator broken or off track, refuses to roll further than 4 inches down.

Drivers door seal torn

Wood trim cracked

OCD Nightmare #1: Wood trim covering CD player replaced with wrong pattern

Seat belts refuse to retract with any real urgency.

Dash pixels dying/dead on left side of cluster

DICE MediaBridge Mic dangling from a hole in the ceiling

OCD Nightmare #2: “Custom” Subwoofer addition by previous owner

Passenger vanity mirror cover broken/light randomly turns on and off.

General scuffs and scrapes

Custom Wiring on a BMW....HAHHAHAHAHHHAHAHHAH

Well that doesn’t seem too bad (right guys???), except naturally, the most expensive shop-performed interior repairs are needed in order to make this car interior perfect. But hey, at least the factory cup holders are still there! Let’s hope I’m good with trim removal tools!

!!! UNKNOWN HEADER TYPE (MULTI-LINE BREAK?) !!!

I won’t waste much time on the exterior, because if I’m being honest, I bought it because the exterior is near perfect. Thankfully. But of course there are some issues. Such as the driver side front fender liner extension is broken and a nice rock impact in the dead center of the windshield.

Also, the windshield seal is deteriorating on the drivers side because of course it is and the headlights are foggy because I can’t have nice things.

!!! UNKNOWN HEADER TYPE (MULTI-LINE BREAK?) !!!

This is where things get dicey/never take your car in to be inspected unless you want to watch all your money disappear in a cloud of preventative/deferred maintenance oil smoke. Did I mention that I bought this car sight unseen AND out of state? HAHAHAHAH yes I did.

The M54 engine in 3 liter guise was on the Ward’s 10 Best list for 2002 and I believe it deserved a spot there, the 2.5 liter, maybe not so much. While I’ve heard it’s dead reliable(we’ll see), it isn’t shockingly fast by any means and in the wagon, about 8 seconds to 60 maaaayyyyyy be generous. Although, I came into this from a Miata so every time I’m on the gas I feel like this:

But about that dead reliable part. Did I also mention that when I picked it up I noticed oil on the bottom of the engine? Or that I had to top it off on my 900 mile drive home? Oh, whoops, must have forgot because both of those things happened.

So here is where things get a little hazy when it comes to what to do first, and not just because I’m staring through a cloud of steam from the exploded E39 cooling system.

Per the inspection!

Exhaust bracket broken at transmission bell housing

VANOS oil line leaking

Power Steering Reservoir leaking (which will eventually destroy the alternator if left unchecked)

Crankcase Breather Valve System “either leaking externally or has had oil leaked onto the breather system” - basically “we don’t know if it’s bad but you might want to check it out, oh also that will be $1000"

Washer fluid pumps working intermittently

Belt tensioner covers missing

Car vibrates slightly at highway speed, possible bent wheel (car has odd rear tire)

!!! UNKNOWN HEADER TYPE (MULTI-LINE BREAK?) !!!

Well, at the end of the day it’s a 14 year old BMW with 180,000 miles on it. What can you expect right? What I haven’t mentioned here is the 130 pages of digitized maintenance history that came with the car, so much of this got a whole lot less daunting. However, looking at a possible $4000 repair bill on your “brand new” car is never fun. But hey, repeat after me, BMW. MANUAL. WAGON.

Now let’s see how much 330i ZHP motors are on ebay........

(for your time)

And no, I didn’t keep the M badge on the rear.

DISCUSSION (13)

EL_ULY > Anthony Miller
11/16/2016 at 17:44

I can smell the interior from here

Anthony Miller > EL_ULY
11/16/2016 at 17:45

Smells like play-doh!

EL_ULY > Anthony Miller
11/16/2016 at 18:01

YEEEEESSSS!!!!!!

finn's arm > Anthony Miller
11/16/2016 at 18:15

I get that you wanted a manual, but with that list of TLC items, that’s quite expensive.

I replaced the CCV on my E39 wagon off the bat along with everything else while the top end was disassembled. I think it was a couple hundred for all the parts in the two big brown boxes from ECSTuning & FCPEuro. I’ve done the CCV without taking off the manifold. That... required finger strength unlike anything else I’ve experienced.

Anthony Miller > finn's arm
11/16/2016 at 18:26

Yeah, I’ve looked at CCV kits, all said and done I could do it myself for something like $150 and that’s if it even needs to be done, the oil is probably coming from somewhere else. The labor is where shops get you of course. And the TLC list didn’t grow that long until I took it in. I knew there were issues, but thankfully there aren’t any that immediately effect the drivability of the vehicle.

Decay buys too many beaters > Anthony Miller
11/16/2016 at 19:05

Advice from the owner of a basket case E39 540i

Drivers window regulator broken or off track, refuses to roll further than 4 inches down. Don’t use the window and buy a replacement regulator. Your window clamp is getting jammed on the upper rear cable guide, eventually the window will come off and fall into the door

Drivers door seal torn. Mine too, haven’t had any issues with water intrusion

Wood trim cracked. Yup

Seat belts refuse to retract with any real urgency. This is probably why your door seal is chewed up :)

Dash pixels dying/dead on left side of cluster. Yup

Additionally check for water flooding your brake booster and other various issues.

Anthony Miller > Decay buys too many beaters
11/16/2016 at 19:12

I heard you can fix slow seatbelts with furniture upholstery cleaner. Weird. But this is great! I have a fellow sufferer! Did you buy that wagon?

Decay buys too many beaters > Anthony Miller
11/16/2016 at 19:19

Not yet, seller and I have not been in the same state long enough to close the deal. Both of us seem to travel a lot for work.

Still definitely the plan! The manual V8 wagon lust is strong, and insurance gave me a check that should pretty easily cover the whole project (assuming my time has no value lol) Might even have enough left over to fix my timing chain guides :/

Honeybunchesofgoats > Anthony Miller
11/16/2016 at 19:29

Regarding the dash vent: I can’t guarantee you that it will work, but one of the best tricks I ever learned about fixing PIA interior items that won’t stay in place is to cut a small bit of electrical tape, put it over the clip then fit it. The added thickness along with the friction from the tape really helps things stay in place.

finn's arm > Anthony Miller
11/17/2016 at 10:24

I had the same issue with my window washer pump - it’s behind the wheel arch on my 528iT. I believe there are multiple reservoirs. Buy a couple $8-12 Continental pumps off ebay. You’ll go through a few. They are used on multiple cars.

I replaced the vanos line recently on my E36. The banjo bolt just didn’t seem seated correctly, but i replaced all to avoid future issues.

Anthony Miller > finn's arm
11/17/2016 at 11:51

Interesting about the pumps. It doesn’t help that one of the washer fluid lines is cracked too so there isn’t a great seal for the pumps to work well. Also, I meant to address this, my original offer was for six, I got a tentative yes and then he withdrew the car for sale. :/ Me needing a car plus the only cheaper one had a longer to-do list and was three years older, I bit the bullet and went as high as I was comfortable. Regarding the oil leaks, my bet is on one of the banjo bolts not seating well. Also, thinking the welch plugs on the back of the CCV/Oil filter housing probably need replacing.

Cogito_Ergo_Ieiunium > Anthony Miller
08/03/2018 at 22:34

I would agree that the M54 3.0 was the more reliable of the pair. My 2001 530i sport package car, has 288K on the clock and still gives me 29 miles to the gallon on the highway sometimes 30 if I’m gentle. It’s been mostly standard maintenance by myself like cooling system X2, and the alternator have been replaced, along with other little odds and ends over my 11 years with the vehicle. Best of luck with your E39 manual wagon!

SomethingAlmostAlwaysBroken > Anthony Miller
08/18/2019 at 12:22

Co ngrats on the new car! You’ll grow to love it. I picked up my own e39 540 M-Sport last year and love it even with all its flaws. MIne had a few major things that needed addressing (timing chain guides and tires) but thankfully I was able to do the chain myself. SOme links that come in handy for diagnosis of issues and shopping for parts are below. INPA will let you read all modules for faults when they occur Realoem is a godsend for finding that random missing part/screw/rivit etc (think getting the right part for the fender liner and associated fasteners).

Depending on your skill and or bravey level, most repairs on these cars are pretty manageable for DIY. Be on the lookout for water in the spare well, that can kill the supension compressor quickly (~$500 for reman), mine was leaking at the hatch glass seal.

Also, if you find some interior part is way to expensive (51498217214) don’t forget to check out https://www.thingiverse.com/ and look to see if someone had the plans for it to be 3D printed. Local libraies will sometimes have a 3D printer for use.

Good luck and welcome to the money pit that is the e39!

https://mega.nz/#!kAASwa7I!AJLVnnEBwLgzDPzBeQ4uQo60p1lbU2BsZofE-TBYGmk

https://www.realoem.com/