COMFORT

"Logansteno: Bought a VW?" (logansteno)
11/02/2016 at 21:11 • Filed to: None

Today I experienced the most comfortable car in the world.*

A 1995 Oldsmobile Eighty-Eight Royale.

I’ve sat on expensive pieces of living room furniture far less comfortable than the front bench seat in that car.

Sure, you can’t take a turn at more than 10mph without sliding all over the vinyl seats with ZERO bolstering, but who cares? COMFORT .

There’s also the fact that we went over some very rough train tracks and my ass didn’t feel a damn thing.

The interior felt very... not 90s GM. If that makes sense. A lot of surfaces were soft touch and nothing had any overdone texturing to it. The “wood” trim was also matte finished and looked pretty believable.

Man, old people continue to have the right idea.

* Probably NOT the most comfortable car in the world

DISCUSSION (25)

Honeybunchesofgoats > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 21:14

Wait until you sit in a late model Town Car. So much comfort right until the body rolls you through the passenger window and onto the curb.

S65 > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 21:17

Needs magnesium wheels

http://www.vintageeng.com/products/magnesium-wheels/eagle-lola-mclaren-wheels/

MM54 > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 21:18

This is a friend of mine, it’s a very comfortable car. Everything about it is soft.

gmctavish needs more space > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 21:20

I’ve always liked these for no apparent reason. I’ve never driven one, or even sat in one. I also like their platform-mate Lesabres and Bonnevilles. Wait, I’ve driven a Bonneville, and it was extremely comfortable, it was like driving a velour couch. I guess that’s why I like them. I’ve always sort of wanted one of them as a winter beater, but I don’t need a winter beater.

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > S65
11/02/2016 at 21:22

Nope. Mini sawblades like what’s pictured look gr8.

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > MM54
11/02/2016 at 21:22

RACEBOAT!

PotbellyJoe and 42 others > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 21:24

I learned to drive in one of these at Drivers’ Ed. This was the first car I ever put the accelerator down on to enter a highway. It was maroon, but it was a 1995.

S65 > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 21:24

Mini sawblades made of magnesium

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > gmctavish needs more space
11/02/2016 at 21:27

I was sooooo close to buying a green over tan Bonneville to replace my M3. My mom talked me out of it because she thought I wouldn’t like it though. So now I drive a pickup that rides like an ox cart.

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > Honeybunchesofgoats
11/02/2016 at 21:29

I about slid into the drivers seat from the passenger seat the first turn we took. I had to brace myself after that.

Boxer_4 > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 21:33

Alternatively, place 3 people across up front on the bench seat, 4 people across in the back... this prevents passenger sliding...

Ask me (and MM54) how I (we) know...

Benjamin Rolland > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 22:11

My grandparents had one of those for most of my childhood. It was great. The wood is actually metal, indented it with a hotwheels car.

404 - User No Longer Available > MM54
11/02/2016 at 22:19

Dat Solstice tho...

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 22:30

Kinja'd!!!

You could get one with bucket seats and a supercharged 3800.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 22:39

Hi, local boat expert here. Might I suggest its far more attractive platform mate the Oldsmobile LSS?

Kinja'd!!!

Or, if you want something on the same platform but with slightly more sporting credentials and a Supercharged Buick 3800, the 1994 Pontiac Bonneville SSEi in the proper color of green with the proper gold-lace wheels.

Kinja'd!!!

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/02/2016 at 22:40

Mmmm, SSEi

Man I should’ve got a Bonneville.

PS9 > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/02/2016 at 22:49

You know you’re american when you can look at those terrible examples of human technology and be filled with desire for them.

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > PS9
11/02/2016 at 22:56

What, objectively, is so awful about them?

arl > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 23:03

My Grandfather (a WW II vet,) had an early 1980's caddy that was comfort deluxe. I remember gliding around in that boat, barely noticing the bumps and imperfections in the road. For some reason I can’t recall the exterior color of the car, but the interior was red. Red velour, red plastic, red inserts on various buttons. It was the glorious red comfort mobile.

wiffleballtony > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 23:05

So is this the version sans cheese?

RallyWrench > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/02/2016 at 23:09

Always liked those Bonnies, and that’s definitely the color.

PS9 > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/02/2016 at 23:17

I love the 90s american sofacars as much as you do, but...come on, man. Terrible disintegrating plastics, floaty handling, the shitty corner cutting that resulted in bad engineering (sidebar: FUCK YOU, CHEAP ASS METAL COOLANT EXCHANGER! MY BELOVED 96 FIREBIRD DIED FOR NO REASON BECAUSE OF YOU AND YOUR SHITTY PLASTIC ATTACHMENTS THAT DISINTEGRATED RIGHT AS I RAN OUT OF MONEY TO FIX THE NEXT PROBLEM! FUCK YOOOOOOOOO) a couple of good engines (3800SC, LS1 obvs, Quad Four) among soooooo many others ranging from the agressively mediocre to the downright bad (The 3400, the Northstar, the less we say about non-ecotech 4 cylinders the better)

I loved my 3800, but not so much so that I won’t admit that it was a big thirsty engine making the kind of power you could get out of a 4 cylinder that returned better fuel economy pretty much everywhere else in the market. The SC was making less power than similar NA V6s from Japan. And of course chief of all of old GM sins was the photocopying of a platform from brand to brand; the Camaro was also the Firebird, the Impala was also the Bonneville, The Cavalier cum Cobalt was also the Sunfire cum G5, repeat ad-nauseaum until the portfolio is loaded with bland, self-cannibalizing products that can’t sustain the company.

tl:dr -> I love a lot of the things old GM made, but that doesn’t stop me from acknowledging how shit they were.

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > PS9
11/02/2016 at 23:35

The 3800 is well known to regularly get 30 mpg highway. The NA version of the series II also made the same amount of power and way more torque than the 3.0L DOHC V6 the late 90s Camry used.

I’ve also never got the disintegrating plastics thing. We’ve owned numerous late 90s to early 00s GM cars and the only thing plastic that ever breaks on them are the replaceable clips holding stuff together because I pull on them wrong taking them apart. Shitty texturing on the plastic though, yes.

shop-teacher > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
11/02/2016 at 23:55

My dad almost bought an LSS. He bought a used Aurora instead. Massive mistake.

shop-teacher > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
11/02/2016 at 23:58

My Grandpa had a Park Ave in that platform. Such a great and comfy car.