Holy Shit.

"TheHondaBro" (wwaveform) 01/09/2016 at 23:39 • Filed to: None

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The Powerball will rise to $1.3 BILLION for the next drawing. I KNOW it’s really around $500 million in actual winnings, but holy. fucking. shit. I can’t even.

EDIT: It will reach $1.3 billion if no numbers are drawn. Still...

f86sabre > TheHondaBro 01/09/2016 at 23:41

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I can.

Caleb "If a rally car can do it, so can my Malibu" M. S. > f86sabre 01/09/2016 at 23:45

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i, in fact, did even

fhrblig > TheHondaBro 01/09/2016 at 23:46

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I would LOVE to even.

Biggus Dickus (RevsBro) > TheHondaBro 01/09/2016 at 23:48

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It’s more than $500M, depends on a cash payout or annuity choice. Also, taxes are a bitch

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > TheHondaBro 01/09/2016 at 23:48

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Yep...buying a ton of tickets for wednesdays drawing. If I win, every Oppo gets a Miata

Sam > TheHondaBro 01/09/2016 at 23:49

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Cash payout for the $900M is $580M. So 1.3B will probably be a lot more.

Your boy, BJR > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/09/2016 at 23:51

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The fuck did I do to you to deserve that shit?

Just make mine the Jersey equivalent: an IROC Z.

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Your boy, BJR 01/09/2016 at 23:52

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*puts down binoculors*

NO MIATA FOR YOU

Chariotoflove > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/09/2016 at 23:56

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I’ll take his!

Arben72 > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 00:00

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Can I have the fiat turbo version once you win? Miatas nice and all, but daddy needs boost.

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Arben72 01/10/2016 at 00:01

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Every Oppo gets LS swapped miata?

For Sweden > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 00:01

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Nibbles will mess this up somehow

TheHondaBro > For Sweden 01/10/2016 at 00:02

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Fucking Nibbles.

thedevilinside > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 00:02

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I can’t find a real source, where’d you see no one won? I matched zero numbers on my one ticket.

Arben72 > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 00:02

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Not going to fight that one haha. Squad goals amirite.

quada > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 00:03

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Aren’t the odds like 1:292M or something like that? Isn’t it passed the mark to make it profitable to buy every single number combination? How much is a ticket, $2 still?

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 00:09

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You know what you must do:

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Chariotoflove 01/10/2016 at 00:10

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I guess you’d have 2 then!

TheHondaBro > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/10/2016 at 00:11

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This is my ideal Accord Coupe:

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 00:13

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But what about Brown?

Your boy, BJR > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 00:13

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GOOD.

CAR_IS_MI > thedevilinside 01/10/2016 at 00:14

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Same here, power ball site still says results pending. If it is in fact 0 winners I will be up early tomorrow to grab tickets before work since its my only day available before wed.

TheHondaBro > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/10/2016 at 00:14

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eh

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Your boy, BJR 01/10/2016 at 00:17

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We’ll all drive circles around you holding our binoculars

Sneaky Pete > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 00:19

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I got 1 number out of 30, how many millions did I win?

gergey - Wishes vette was Datsun > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 00:20

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Sweet, we got it in writing! I’d also request the Fiat 124 version please :D

TheHondaBro > Sneaky Pete 01/10/2016 at 00:20

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-3

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > gergey - Wishes vette was Datsun 01/10/2016 at 00:22

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I can imagine that now. “Uh yeah, I need to place an order in a couple hundred 124 Spyders in every color combo there is. Thanks...”

NonDriftingS13 > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 00:27

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Can I get something of equivalent value?

gergey - Wishes vette was Datsun > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 00:27

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They might give a bulk discount... ;)

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > NonDriftingS13 01/10/2016 at 00:28

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A v6 mustang?

Your boy, BJR > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 00:33

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*riddler machine disapproval noise*

Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras > Your boy, BJR 01/10/2016 at 00:34

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*staring through binoculars intensifies*

Vimto > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 00:40

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Someone please win. I work at a grocery store and essentially had to stand there and sell powerball tickets to clueless idiots for 8 hours. I don’t want to hear that word again.

Steve in Manhattan > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 01:08

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My supervisor tasked me to buy tickets for myself on the way home tonight. Went to Fairway to get dinner, and completely forgot.

And I love those people that only play it when it gets into big numbers - are you telling me that 8 or 10 million bucks wouldn’t make a difference in your life? Go big, or go home.

MoFinWiley > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 01:10

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Only 75% of the possible number combinations were sold.

That’s less than I would have figured.

I am guessing 1.6-1.7B for the next jackpot if there was no winner.

NonDriftingS13 > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 01:10

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If I can get a pair of turbos with that V6!

DrJohannVegas > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 01:15

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Good luck with your new Prius! (H/T to CB.)

Burn-Spaz1966-Burn > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 01:30

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Get the Brown one.....

Svend > TheHondaBro 01/10/2016 at 02:25

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I could never understand how or why you had to declare and then pay a TAX on a car you bought privately from a private seller (non dealership) but also that you pay TAX on winnings such as lottery or gambling winnings, we only pay tax on the interest of the winnings.

Svend > Arben72 01/10/2016 at 02:34

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I’m with you buddy, the Fiat is sexy.

Svend > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 02:38

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Some with steering wheels on the correct side for the Brits, Aussies, Kiwis, Maltese and Indians.

Svend > Biggus Dickus (RevsBro) 01/10/2016 at 02:43

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Taxes on lottery a gambling winnings, screw that, yay Britain.

Chariotoflove > Supreme Chancellor and Glorious Leader SaveTheIntegras 01/10/2016 at 12:04

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Exactly! Then I would rotate them so they both got healthy workouts.