I am Very Aware that Deez Nuts is Polling at 9 Percent in the Tar Heel State.

"Jack Does Cars" (jackdoescars)
08/20/2015 at 11:09 • Filed to: deez nuts

Source? I live there, and nobody will shut up about it. Friends, my boss at work, local news, and pretty much everybody else who is paying attention to the news.

Yesterday, Raleigh’s ABC affiliate, WTVD, posted the following to Twitter yesterday, which reportedly shows that Trump (and the hair) are leading in North Carolina, and Hillary is at a close second, newcomer, “Deez Nuts,” is pulling at a sold 9%. Not bad for a fake candidate.

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

It is very true dear friends of the Internet, Deez Nuts is not a real candidate who is running for president...technically. While The Daily Beast reports that Nuts did, in fact, fill out an FEC Form 2 (which basically says, “Hey, I’m running for the President of the United States”), Deez Nuts is actually a 15 year old boy from Wallingford, Iowa named Brady Olson.

And for some odd reason, people who legally cannot vote also cannot run for President, so Olson/Nuts campaign is effectively toast.

I bring this up because it is really starting to annoy me. I have seen it retweeted many times, I heard my boss talking about it when I came into work yesterday, it was mentioned on the radio this morning, and it was even on ABC 11’s (WTVD) and NBC 17’s (WNCN) morning news blocks.

And to see that nearly 10% of North Carolina’s, my state’s, population would vote for Deez Nuts as President is mildly unnerving. Believe it or not, the populous of Raleigh is quite educated and quite smart. As Forbes and !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! reported last year, Raleigh (and the surrounding areas), are the seventh smartest in the U.S, beating out San Francisco and Seattle.

Because a fake entity whose namesake comes from a wildly popular Vine that has quickly come to much revered, “Meme Status,” can run for President, why can’t my dog Texas?

Texas is a fierce and independent leader, that will get what he wants, even if there are no survivors.

Obviously, my #TexasForPrez2K16 campaign should be taken as a joke, just like the Deez Nuts campaign, I will still have to live with people constantly coming up to me and saying, “Hey Jack, did you know that Deez Nuts is polling at 9% in North Carolina?” Trust me, I know.

One could say that Deez Nuts has, “GOT EEM.” And, “EEM,” is a tenth of North Carolina voters.

Lead image and poll statistic come from The Daily Beast , actual picture of my actual dog, Texas, was taken by me, and the Tweet comes from Twitter.

DISCUSSION (17)

Hahayoustupidludditeshutupandgohandcrankyourmodeltalready > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 11:18

“And to see that nearly 10% of North Carolina’s, my state’s, population would vote for Deez Nuts as President is mildly unnerving.”

You don’t think that it’s more unnerving that 40% of your state’s population would vote for Donald Trump as President?

extraspecialbitter > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 11:20

“Deez nuts” predates Vine by a few decades.

Jack Does Cars > Hahayoustupidludditeshutupandgohandcrankyourmodeltalready
08/20/2015 at 11:21

Yeah good point, the people in the civilized areas (Raleigh, Greensboro, Charlotte, etc.) are much more left, its the insane people that live in the woods and fields that actually think Donald Trump is remotely good in any way. I wish it was, I don’t know, 0%?

Jack Does Cars > extraspecialbitter
08/20/2015 at 11:21

It’s a reference to the Vine.

Hahayoustupidludditeshutupandgohandcrankyourmodeltalready > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 11:22

0% would be ideal.

Mattbob > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 11:22

Maybe it’s just a statement of how fucking terrible the other candidates are.

Jack Does Cars > Mattbob
08/20/2015 at 11:30

#Texas4Prez2K16 Oppo’s Political Dog

Ash78, voting early and often > extraspecialbitter
08/20/2015 at 11:39

Yeah, did Deez Nuts make a comeback since the 90s? I was gonna say this kid is too young to even remember Snoop, etc.

RallyWrench > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 12:12

I’m gonna pull a For Sweden here.

Quite smart

40% Trump

Shit’s depressing.

Mattbob > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 12:44

I would vote for him. Look at that face!

Spridget > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 14:23

I feel so proud to live here.

Jack Does Cars > Spridget
08/20/2015 at 15:51

I don’t hate NC, just where I live in NC.

Jack Does Cars > RallyWrench
08/20/2015 at 15:53

It’s the uneducated that like him.

Dusty Ventures > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 18:20

You could read it as “9% are so uninformed that they would vote for a fake candidate” or you could read it as “9% get the joke and want to get in on the polling shenanigans”

Jack Does Cars > Dusty Ventures
08/20/2015 at 21:31

Knowing the populous of rural NC, I honestly don’t know what to believe

Spridget > Jack Does Cars
08/20/2015 at 21:43

As a resident of Orange County with family in Alamance county, I know the feeling.

Jack Does Cars > Spridget
08/20/2015 at 23:09

You’ve got Chapel Hill, which is basically the Seattle of Central North Carolina. Here in Wake County, the best we’ve got is Cary and Apex, which are both home to people that think they are better than everyone else. I like living here because the quality of life is great, but the people can really piss me off sometimes.