"Decay buys too many beaters" (decay)
08/15/2015 at 01:44 • Filed to: I'm not a mechanic
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"Decay buys too many beaters" (decay)
08/15/2015 at 01:44 • Filed to: I'm not a mechanic | 5
| 23 |
I work on my vehicles a lot, as in my garage door is open (due to poor lighting) every weekend revealing to the world various projects I’m working on. This leads many of my neighbors to (for some reason) make the assumption that I’m a trade mechanic and seek my help (and no, I don’t mean simple advice, which I’m always happy to provide) with troubleshooting various issues on their cars. To these people my answer is always the same, “I’m not a mechanic, but I’ll gladly troubleshoot your (insert generic 97-07 Japanese sedan), if you pay me. Just know that I probably won’t be cheaper than a shop, offer no guarantees, and I break a lot of stuff working on the cars I personally own (and I gesture to my wall of shame covered in broken shit).” This usually is pretty effective at allowing me to get back to my own work without further interruption.
Well today, as I was tearing down a 1985 NB50 motor for some reed valves, one of my neighbors approached me and said “I see you working on your cars a lot, do you know how to do brake pads?” To which I responded “Yes, I change brake pads at least twice per month on my road/track car.” Already knowing where this was headed I readied my standard response, but he followed with. “I’ll give you a 12 pack of craft beer and a plate full of home made tamales if you help me change the front brakes on my Chrysler.” Unable to turn down such lavish gifts for something I can do in my sleep I responded with “If I get to choose the beer, sure! Bring it around.” It took me 30 minutes (and 1.5 beers) from key out of the ignition, not bad at all!
Also, did you know that the Chrysler 200 uses nearly entirely metric bolts on the chassis? Neither did I!
DogonCrook
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 02:24 |
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Shade. Tree. For. Life. I am drunk my hands are bloody, I have eaten kolaches and enchiladas (it’s been a long day).
Sam
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 02:28 |
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That is not a bad deal at all. How were the tamales?
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Decay buys too many beaters
> Sam
08/15/2015 at 02:34 |
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Absolutely delicious! There were chicken ones, some real good barbecue pork ones as well, and some amazing green salsa that I’m going to need to request a recipie for.
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Decay buys too many beaters
> DogonCrook
08/15/2015 at 02:42 |
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Sounds like a good day to me!
Zibodiz
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 02:50 |
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Also, did you know that the Chrysler 200 uses nearly entirely metric bolts on the chassis? Neither did I!
My ‘05 Sebring did as well. My ‘98 Escort and ‘03 Escaped do too, although those get a bit of a pass because they were entirely designed by Mazda. I’m actually not aware of any car from the last decade, aside from Ford trucks, that uses SAE bolt sizes.
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Decay buys too many beaters
> Zibodiz
08/15/2015 at 02:55 |
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Never wrenched on an American car before, expected it to be SAE for some reason. Hell, I was kind of looking forward to using the SAE side of my four year old tool kit for the first time!
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Zibodiz
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 03:07 |
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All the SAE vehicles I’ve worked on were pre-Y2k. I may be totally wrong on this, but I think everyone is trying to ditch SAE. And I gotta say, it would be nice to just have one set of wrenches to carry around.
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Decay buys too many beaters
> Zibodiz
08/15/2015 at 03:12 |
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Amen to that!
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DogonCrook
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 03:33 |
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Tomatillo
Frenchlicker
> Zibodiz
08/15/2015 at 09:38 |
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I share tools with my dad and there had been many times where he is yelling about me losing a certain wrench while working on my car. I stop him right there and ask him what size, most recently he said 9/16 which means there is absolutely no chance I used it on my 98 Taurus that mainly used 8mm 10mm and 13mm wrenches and sockets.
Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 10:24 |
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“Also, did you know that the Chrysler 200 uses nearly entirely metric bolts on the chassis? Neither did I!”
The entire world is moving to Metric. It’s time that the USA got with the program!
The Chrysler 200 might be “American”, but it was developed when Chrysler was owned by Europeans.
E92M3
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 10:38 |
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Your neighbors are cooler than mine. Mine complain that I work on my cars inside the garage with the doors down. I was “using power tools all hours of the night”
In reality I was using my porter cable polisher at 9pm.
norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback
> Zibodiz
08/15/2015 at 11:03 |
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GM trucks use SAE measurements on the wheel nuts. Think the Equinox does too.
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Decay buys too many beaters
> E92M3
08/15/2015 at 11:16 |
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Oh, screw that!
I’ve only received a complaint once, and it was totally justified. I was changing head bearings (they’re pressed in, I don’t have a press) on my motorcycle. This involved thousands of metal on metal hits with a framing hammer, my entire lexicon of exotic profanity, and a steady stream of loud sweedish death metal.
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E92M3
> Decay buys too many beaters
08/15/2015 at 11:54 |
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The lady that complained was walking her dog. I’m like, if you don’t like it walk your dog in the other direction. I can’t wait to move into a house that isn’t in a subdivision.
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Decay buys too many beaters
> E92M3
08/15/2015 at 12:02 |
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HOA I assume? Yeah, no thanks. I’m shopping for a new house right now I told my realator the following. “No HOA, 2 car garage minimum, I’m open to anything else”
I mean where else can a bunch of nosey bored housewives (and house husbands, no need to discriminate) get together and affect the goings on of real people who actually contribute.
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Zibodiz
> Frenchlicker
08/15/2015 at 12:35 |
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That’s hilarious. And interesting, since the Taurus is a purely American vehicle.
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Zibodiz
> norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback
08/15/2015 at 12:39 |
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I may be wong, but I think most lug bolts/nuts are standard to both systems. My 4-way has both measurements listed on each socket (e.g. “19mm / 3/4”).
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norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback
> Zibodiz
08/15/2015 at 13:07 |
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Hmm, didn’t know. We haven’t had to do anything else besides oil and the only plug I have memorized is the Imprezas 17mm.
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Frenchlicker
> Zibodiz
08/15/2015 at 16:07 |
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Didn’t they seek fairly well as the Mondeo in Europe and the Falcon Ghia in Australia though? That’s why I assumed it was an acceptable thing.
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Zibodiz
> Frenchlicker
08/15/2015 at 18:00 |
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I was referring to where they were engineered (i.e. the first-gen Escape, Fusion, second-gen Escort, etc., were engineered in Japan by Mazda, on behalf of Ford. The Five Hundred, and later, virtually all of the current-run Ford vehicles were engineered in Germany by Volvo or Ford Germany.) To the best of my knowledge, the first 3 generations of Taurus were all-American.
I hadn’t thought about it before, but I suppose that having large international sales would be an incentive to use Metric; I don’t know if cars are built with SAE bolts for foreign markets, but if not, it would be simpler to only have one set of bolts.
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Frenchlicker
> Zibodiz
08/15/2015 at 18:09 |
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I prefer working with metric bolts myself. One can do so more absentmindedly. “Hmm what’s the next size up from an 8, a 9!” is easier that “ What the next size up from a 9/16, hm 10/16 so 5/8.” No matter how often I work on things I still do this for some reason. It's a ridiculous fault of mine.
AM3R shamefully returns
> E92M3
08/15/2015 at 19:14 |
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Amen, the HOA lady gave me an earful after I spent an afternoon detailing my cars. I don’t have a garage apparently me detailing my cars is a nuisance if it takes more than 2 hours.
Too bad I don't give a fuck, most neighbors will just tell me my cars look great as they pass by or jokingly ask me to do their car next. The HOA loves to make a problem out of nothing haha.