So that insane Georgia mom thing

"R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet" (r-saldana) 04/15/2015 at 13:49 • Filed to: None

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I read the Gawker story and all accompanying material and thought to myself before I began reading the police report over on the smoking gun, "I bet her husband was a military guy." I'll be damned if I didn't get to the bottom of the report from TSG and lo and behold "estranged husband is an Iraq war vet".

I focus on this because this seems in line with some of the truly awful, and fucking insane shit that I have heard about in the military spouse community. Some of the seediest shit takes place on message boards designed for this kind of stuff, that were built up in the base housing and towns surrounding military bases. There are some genuinely sick people in and around kids and military members alike. In fact I would venture to say that actual combat veterans need protection from these kinds of people because the disconnect between "You made me very angry, I need to be as far away from you as possible" and "You have made me so angry that I feel nothing while killing you" is not so easy to distinguish.

All things considered, she just officially gave up any even partial visitation rights to her estranged children. and I also hope that the 16 year old who raped her faces punishment fitting his horrible actions. And can I ask the oppo-verse, wtf is the deal with people in their early 20s and teens in this era being so focused on sex that they have to rape and/or take advantage of people?

\is only 30, so not trying to beat the "those damn kids" old man drum

Have some thermodynamic Formula 1 donuts for your time

And some classic Le Mans footage too

For Sweden > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 04/15/2015 at 13:58

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Sure, but YOLO

505Turbeaux > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 04/15/2015 at 13:58

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before the human brain is wired to perform within social norms (in your 20's, or sometimes, never), there is a whole lot of instinct and curiosity that goes on and affects decisions. This is only made worse by the sexualized nature of everything these days. I am not saying media or entertainment is glamorizing or condoning it, but the fact that sex is absolutely everywhere makes people with questionable or undeveloped senses of morality think it is okay to take what you think is yours, and even in situations where it might not happen, the next Victorias Secret catalog to come in the mail for your mom might be the thing that sets you down that path to rape.

Just saying, it is everywhere, everyone is doing it as far as anyone sees. Not like it hasn't been before, but if you see something pleasurable you have never experienced or isn't easy for you to get, you start thinking how to get it at all costs. And I am not sure how to say this without sounding wrong, but she certainly was putting sex out there on the table pretty hard that night. Not that it makes it right, but it was out there

Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 04/15/2015 at 13:59

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I didn't read the smoking gun report, but I saw no mention of rape.

That being said, the two daughter's friends that the mother slept with were both 18, that is the age of consent. I can only assume that this is not how the mother normally acts, and she just got so hammered that she really didn't know what she was doing. You'd hope anyway.

Not that this makes it right, mind you. But I have to say if I was an 18 year old kid and my friends attractive mom started doing that stuff, I can't say I'd complain too much.

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > 505Turbeaux 04/15/2015 at 14:18

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Right, and if any Gawker folks followed me here by chance (they shouldn't I didn't post on the tpoic because I wanted to avoid them at all costs) I am in no way blaming the victim.

I guess even though at one point I may have been sunject to the sensationalism of sexuality at a point in my early 20s, I know that was never at a point that I just "had to have sex with anything with a twat and a pulse". Maybe the long deployments, traumas of combat, and collapse of two of my fathers three marriages have made me less focused on fulfilling my "sexual needs/desires". Even when I was wild and drunk and there were women of less than quality reputation around, I never thought to myself, "Hey self! She wants to have sex with you even though you haven't even spoken with her at all. Oh and she is super plastered drunk, yeah dude she wants it. Go ahead and do it up broseph." That train of thought just doesn't compute with me. I think I wuold rather be celibate than have to deal with any of the potential adverse circumstances that idiots put themselves in, regarding sex.

All that is moot now, since I am married, (But rape can still happen when you are married, not downplaying that one bit) and have no desire to be with anyone but my wife anyway.

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! 04/15/2015 at 14:18

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It is referenced at the tale end of the police report, as a statement made by the teenage daughter.

505Turbeaux > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 04/15/2015 at 14:24

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yeah I had some wild times, I was fucking my history teacher my senior year anyhow so that was a good outlet. Since 23, been pretty monogamous if I was with someone, pretty wild if not. I guess when I am happy and in love I am good to just get in one persons pants and not look around. I certainly haven't been in any trauma like war before to grow me up extra quick either, but it took till around 23 for me to say, okay, you dont have any STD's, you dont have any kids, so lets just calm the fuck down before one of those happens. 14-17 years old though you think some pretty stupid and outlandish things, especially if your parents were as fucked up as mine were - regardless of what is on the media and TV

jariten1781 > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 04/15/2015 at 14:29

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I dun know, I didn't find the military spouse community to be any different than similar social-economic groups. The non-technical junior enlisted group was just like any trailer park, inner city ghetto, or rural town whose money maker had left. Mostly good kids sorting through life with a few troublemakers here and there (though they could cause a hell of a lot of trouble).

One thing that throws a wrench in it for some of them is that the 18 year old kid is being moved half way across the country. He wants to bring his girlfriend along, but the only way to get it paid for is to get married. Now you've got a kid married to this girl who, outside the realities of the military, he probably would have broke up with 6 months later when he found her cheating with his 3 best friends. It gets messy. Then, if he can work it out, the craziest stick around and prey on the new meat. Happens the other way too, guy pressures his gf into getting married so she'll come along. Eventually she finds out his antics and they get divorced, but now she's stuck far away from family and friends without a support structure so she's easy prey for the less scrupulous of the guys.

I figure, with the additional support the military provides it kind of balances the scales so overall the community is pretty line-on-line with other communities of similar skills and earnings.

As to: "wtf is the deal with people in their early 20s and teens in this era being so focused on sex that they have to rape and/or take advantage of people?"

I don't think it's really any different than it's been in the past. Things just go world wide so much easier that the increased visibility makes it feel like it's happen more 'these days'. 20 years ago you never would have heard of this outside GA. 100 years ago you never would have heard of it at all.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 04/15/2015 at 14:29

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I dunno about the rape thing... I'm 30 as well and it seems like shit has gone down hill fast in only a decade. Either that or it's always been happening but more people are speaking out about it, so it's just the reporting rate that's rising. My gut feeling is it's probably a little of both.

As for military spouses... ugh. It's disgusting. I used to be in the Navy and the things I heard and saw were just sickening. Now don't get me wrong, I knew some people that were in wonderful relationships, had families and things were more often than not great. But it seems that things are either great, or get stupid-crazy in a real hurry.

Because marriage takes 2 people, I think there are two primary causes for insane military relationships: the service member and the spouse. I know it sounds overly simplistic, but hear me out on this.

I feel uniquely qualified in saying this, but a lot of service members are stupid. And I don't necessarily mean low IQ or no book smarts, on the contrary, I met a lot of brilliant people there. But I would say on the average, most come from problematic families, and have social issues or problems adjusting. The military doesn't help, either, by acting like a giant baby-sitting service for maladjusted adults. So a lot of times service members wind up in unhealthy, codependent relationships because they've never had experience with positive, healthy relationships. Except now they are on their own as adults and trying to, as they perceive it, act as such. Also consider the stresses of a military lifestyle, the deployments, etc. so a lot of people look to a relationship to find stability.

Speaking of looking for stability, a lot of non-military women in military towns recognize and prey on this. They used to call them "First And Fifthteens," because they knew that's when you got paid, so that's when these girls were most likely to go on a date with you. There were quite a few girls who would juggle multiple guys, so that way they always had a guy around when the others were deployed. And that's just the petty, harmless stuff.

A lot of women would marry, or at least get pregnant by military guys, to get their benefits or to use them as a way to get out of the town if they didn't like it. The problem is, when the member did transfer, they wound up in another town exactly like the one they left, only in a different part of the country. One story I remember, this girl was living at home with her folks and wanted out. She met a fellow sailor who I was living in the barracks with, and proposed a marriage of convenience, because he would get authorized for housing allowance so he could move out of the barracks and she could move in with him and out of her parents home. So they did it, but he took his marriage vows more seriously than she did, because he came home one day from duty to find her having a 3-way with 2 other sailors we knew. To make things even more screwed up, she attacked him with a kitchen knife for reasons no one can really explain. I guess the thought of jail seemed more appealing than having to move back home after he divorced her? I dunno.

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > Snuze: Needs another Swede 04/15/2015 at 14:37

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So many similarities big brother. (Marine here) All I can say is yeah you're right. Either the couple are extremely well adjusted treat each other right and their kids right too, or they are easily on par with the Jerry Springer stars of yesterday.

R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet > Snuze: Needs another Swede 04/15/2015 at 14:38

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Oh and they made those paperwork marriages a felony for defrauding the government. You can end up doing some serious time for it, and they installed a statute of limitations that goes backwards!!! How effed up is that?

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Snuze: Needs another Swede 04/15/2015 at 14:49

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Shit things have gone down hill faster than that. I graduated in 2012. My sister is in the 9th grade currently, and is around stupid shit that I never had to deal with. It's fucking social media. 90% of the bullshit that happens to people below the age of 20, was more than likely rooted from some social media sight. Whether it was bullying or shared explicit images, or fucking anything.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/15/2015 at 14:58

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Good point, I didn't even think of that. When I was in high school you had to be rich to have a cell phone and text message. Of course we also didn't have phones with keyboards. Or that could display pictures.

///Mvious > R Saldana [|Oo|======|oO|] - BTC/ETH/LTC Prophet 04/15/2015 at 16:36

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I read the Gawker story

...well, there's your problem.