There is nothing wrong with sporty SUV's.

"My citroen won't start" (lucasboechat)
02/05/2015 at 00:35 • Filed to: None

The X5M, SQ5, AMG SUV's, Range Rover Sports, Cayenne GTS and so on, they are perfectly fine automobiles.

DISCUSSION (31)

 V8 Rustler > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 00:39

I sometimes don't understand OPPO/Jalopnik. They lust after FWD hatches and wagons, but they hate things like the X6M, an AWD Turbo V8 Crossover.

*Ignoring transmission type.

Kinja'd!!!

My citroen won't start > V8 Rustler
02/05/2015 at 00:42

I don't understand that either, surely this is more of an automotive marvel than a FWD Hatch.

bob and john > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 00:42

here is my issue with them:

you want something sporty yes? something have the fam around? why not an RS7? A S6? E63 wagon? They are faster, better looking, and better at hauling crap aorund (helps when the loading point isnt at waist level.

and dont tell me its for the off roading. just dont. With the 275 wide tires and sports car rubber, they things are going about as far off road as my supersports motorcycle.

so, to recap: bad at being an SUV, meh at being a hauler, meh at being a sportscar.
sports wagon: meh at being a hauler, better at being a sports car, cheaper to run, and probably about as good off-road

i get SUV's. dont get me wrong. I'd LOVE an Icon bronco or a diesel G-wagon.

these? no.

Funktheduck > V8 Rustler
02/05/2015 at 00:44

I don't like the x6 because I think it's ugly. I don't dislike the concept though. drive what makes you happy

My citroen won't start > bob and john
02/05/2015 at 00:47

Yeah, but these are not built to serve a purpose. Just like a dog, unless you live in a farm or whatever, you don't go "I want to get a poodle because they are good at hunting ducks" , no I get a poodle because poodles are cute and evil. You buy a X5M because it is insanely fast when compared to other SUV and because it is cool.

Logansteno: Bought a VW? > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 00:48

Sports Utility Vehicles are some of my favorite vehicles. What I would do for a Supercharged Range Rover Sport Autobiography...

My citroen won't start > Logansteno: Bought a VW?
02/05/2015 at 00:51

Friend of mine owns one, I'd kill for one.

CB > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 00:51

You know what? That's actually a really good argument.

bob and john > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 00:51

I dont see the cool factor in it.

this may be my inner engineer speaking, but I like things that are GOOD at what they do. I hate useless compromises.

I like a powerful SUV. I really do.

but to lower it and give it ADSURDLY wide tires to try and make it handle is pointless. its never going to be a great handler. and now you are just ruining the off road part of it. in which case, just get a wagon. its going to better at everything else anyways.

Textured Soy Protein > V8 Rustler
02/05/2015 at 00:55

I dislike the X6—M or otherwise—because it takes a sportyish utility vehicle in the X5 and tries to make it look sportier by chopping the back off, but it doesn't actually end up any sportier. It's just an X5 with the back chopped off so you can't see out the back, and you can't carry around as much crap. I'd rock an X5M though.

My citroen won't start > bob and john
02/05/2015 at 00:57

But the cool factor is that exact thing, it is trying to be something it shouldn't be, that's the reason why Ferrari rally cars are cool. I agree with you, they are completely pointless and there are better alternatives, but a super SUV will always be cool.

bob and john > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 01:00

cool is subjective.

My citroen won't start > bob and john
02/05/2015 at 01:04

Kinja'd!!!

(Just joking, I fully understand your point of view)

bob and john > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 01:04

like I said, inner engineer.

also why i love bikes. you can go bugatti levels of fast for...15?K

My citroen won't start > CB
02/05/2015 at 01:05

That's how I convinced my mom to buy an SRT8 Cherokee haha.

415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°) > bob and john
02/05/2015 at 01:09

Yeah, thats what the All Road etc. was supposed to be, people must think bigger is safer or they just want a giant expensive cock to drive around.

My citroen won't start > bob and john
02/05/2015 at 01:10

The fact that someone managed to make something that weights 2.3 tons reach 0-60 in 4 seconds flat speaks nothing to your inner engineer?

bob and john > 415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°)
02/05/2015 at 01:11

yea. I cant stand them. I think they are just bought by people who want to one up the neighboor. (oh, they bought a X6 50 X-drive? HAVE TO GET AN X6M) or just have to have the most expensive thing they can.

useless cars for useless ego-tistical people.

bob and john > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 01:14

I dont mind THAT part. I'm 100% for that part, stupid amounts of power is GREAT.

but trying to make that bitch handle is POINTLESS. its flawed from the start, no matter what you do it will NEVER handle the way you want it to. and in trying to make it handle that way, you ruined the first reason people would be it: to go off road.

frankly, give it 700hp, give it 2 feet of suspension travel and knobbies, and go have some fun with it. not relagate it to mall crawler.

SmoresTM Has No Chill (O==[][]==O) > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 01:24

Personally, I just want a Hennessy GMC Denali HPE650. That is the pinnacle of "why would you do that/I need one."

Though I still lust after the Cayenne Turbo S and Macan Turbo. They're such great looking SUVs. We took a Cayenne Turbo S skiing in Vermont and our house one the sketchiest, most beat up dirt road (it honestly bordered on being a trail, but wider) I've ever seen. Handled the dirt, ice, and snow like a champ. We even did some very, very minor off roading to test out the "off-road" mode.

 V8 Rustler > Textured Soy Protein
02/05/2015 at 02:23

I've been in the rear of an X6 and it sucks.

Denver Is Stuck In The 90s > V8 Rustler
02/05/2015 at 02:26

In my mind FWD and Performance cant be used in the same sentence. FWD will always be inferior to RWD and AWD in the performance area

 V8 Rustler > Denver Is Stuck In The 90s
02/05/2015 at 03:03

The truth has been spoken.

Denver Is Stuck In The 90s > V8 Rustler
02/05/2015 at 03:05

But also some great efforts have been made. The Focus ST is an amazing piece of machinery, but a mustang will always be better. FWD performance cars will always live at the bottom of the performance totem pole, its embedded into their core design

 V8 Rustler > Denver Is Stuck In The 90s
02/05/2015 at 03:10

Did your RWD Ranger make you change your mind about FWD? I think many people say FWD is good enough because they have never fully experienced all the pros of RWD or AWD.

Denver Is Stuck In The 90s > V8 Rustler
02/05/2015 at 03:19

I actually never cared about which wheels were driven, more about the engine. But ya, after my ranger Im never going back to FWD or an automatic. Well, maybe but I will never only own a FWD and/or automatic car at any given time. I would want a RWD manual to park beside it.

C9200 > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 04:42

I'm with you! Nothing wrong with a sporty SUV. They're not for everyone but they suit their little niche in the market.

Alex B > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 07:25

I agree. The X5M is a great car.

Alex B > V8 Rustler
02/05/2015 at 07:25

It looks really good from that angle.

philsphan09 > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 07:59

IMO the SQ5 is the ultimate sports SUV. You get the Audi Quattro, Fast SUV and stylish....and like $10 million dollars less than the Cayenne GTS / RR Sport.

spanfucker retire bitch > My citroen won't start
02/05/2015 at 08:55

You forgot my favorite!

Kinja'd!!!