![]() 11/25/2015 at 14:30 • Filed to: None | ![]() | ![]() |
(Austin) In Metro News today, an area man is painting his living room while trying not to fall off the ladder and break his neck.
When asked about the task, Ttyymmnn replied, “It’s basically a pain the ass, because we have to keep living in the living room while I’m painting it.”
This is not the first time the living room has been painted. Ttyymmnn painted it 13 years ago, prior to moving into the home with his wife, Mrs. Ttyymmnn. However, they mistakenly chose to paint the room a plain satin white. It has not held up well over the years, and is actually quite boring. The ravages of three young boys have not helped.
“After painting the foyer, I told my wife, ‘You’re going to love it. No, you are GOING to love it, because I am NOT painting it again.’”
However, Mrs. Ttyymmnn expressed some doubts that the new color, which they both hemmed and hawed about for weeks, fearing that it is too dark.
“It’s perfect,” Ttyymmnn reassured her. “No, it’s perfect. Really. You are GOING to love it.”
The project is scheduled to be finished by the end of next week, though delays are inevitable, as the trim work always takes more time than expected. Check back with Metro News for updates.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 14:34 |
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The casual reader would note that no mention is made of what music is playing whilst the walls are being painted. Hopefully, not John Zorn.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 14:39 |
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The background music for this project is whatever video games the boyos are playing. They’ve been home all week, and they are bugging me to let them help. I’m resisting.....
![]() 11/25/2015 at 14:43 |
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I love these types of ceilings.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 14:45 |
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There must be underlying interest in UPS or Amazon.
You could have just stapled boxes to your wall.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 14:49 |
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You’re doing it wrong.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 14:56 |
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Let Mr Bean show you how to do it the right way.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:00 |
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I
Fucking
Hate
Painting
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:00 |
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That’s pretty accurate, really.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:01 |
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???
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:02 |
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I have no idea.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:02 |
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Not sure if serious. Popcorn ceilings were invented by Old Scratch himself. They are evil.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:03 |
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You GIF hadn’t loaded yet. Actually, one of my boys has just about enough hair to do that.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:05 |
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I don’t particularly dislike it, but it was much easier when we painted the first time, before we moved into the house. We could do it all at once. Now, I’ve got to move furniture, paint one wall, with trim, then move furniture back. It’s going to suck.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:07 |
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They seem more homely to me.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:07 |
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Mmm dat smell.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:08 |
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Gotcha. Your boys would have a ball. Dad.........not so much.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:19 |
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They keep wanting to help, and I’m not so sure I want them to. The results might be very much like your GIF.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:20 |
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I have a feeling you’re right.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 15:21 |
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No, they really suck (IMO). They get dirty, they flake off, they capture cobwebs. You can’t paint them, and where my ceiling is separating in the living room will require professional repair. I’m likely going to have the popcorn removed from the living room, kitchen and hallway. Somebody once told me that contractors do popcorn to hide shoddy drywall work.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 16:00 |
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Fucking great; thanks to this painting project, traffic is now backed up on Mopac AND 35! Thanks Obayymmnn!
![]() 11/25/2015 at 16:04 |
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Popcorn does help the acoustics quite a bit. That said, its horrible shit.
Best way to get it off is to drop a tarp over the whole floor, fill a spray bottle with water, and soak the popcorn in sections. Then use a putty knife to scrape off the sections. Then curse yourself for ever thinking that removing popcorn ceiling would ever be better than leaving it alone.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 16:07 |
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Whenever I paint, it’s more like: “Local Man annoys wife”
![]() 11/25/2015 at 16:14 |
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That's why I will pay someone else to do it.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 16:15 |
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Somehow, I think traffic on those roads doesn't need my help to be terrible.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 16:32 |
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Still more interesting and relevant to my life than the shit that flies for news stories around here. Damn feel-good stories.
/end rant
![]() 11/25/2015 at 16:58 |
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I have not forgotten your question about my helping to share stuff to Oppositeblog. Let’s talk a bit more about it off the grid. You can contact me at my screen name @ gmail.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 17:34 |
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Your shirt made my day. Also, very true. Also, also, painting undeniably sucks ass.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 17:39 |
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I really don’t mind the job. I just wish I could empty the room and do it all at once. All the cutting in. All the edges. All the walls. All the trim. There’s no reason why this job shouldn’t take more than a couple of days. It’s going to take two weeks.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 17:58 |
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You are correct sir! They also help in sound deadening.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 17:58 |
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Just move. Next guy’s problem.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 19:05 |
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Unless you’re the one who wants it gone.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 19:32 |
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I was trying to be funny. Yes it is an eyesore and a pain if you own that ceiling.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 22:14 |
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YOU TAKE THAT BACK, SIR.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 22:28 |
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Hire the kids? Isn’t that why you have kids? Free labor?
![]() 11/25/2015 at 23:10 |
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They want to help, but I have enough trouble keeping myself from making a mess. They helped when we painted their room, and we trashed the carpet.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 23:25 |
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“trashed the carpet”
That’s fun. But I bet it really was fun! It’s those little things are make it.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 23:37 |
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Yeah, it was fun. At that time, all three boys were sleeping in the same room. Since they couldn’t decide on a color, we have two blue walls, one green wall, and one yellow wall. And they are bright colors. I’d probably have to repaint it if we ever sold the house, but I doubt we will.
![]() 11/25/2015 at 23:42 |
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Too many memories anyway. Glad you have them with your family.
![]() 11/26/2015 at 03:24 |
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Drop clothes? Your way sounds more fun, tho.
![]() 11/26/2015 at 03:27 |
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Just fyi - we just did one of these. You need to dry scrape first, then WET scrape (or possibly a combo if water is used.) It’s important. That first coat of ceiling paint after a dry scape comes off in sheets at some indeterminate time lateron. Make sure it’s wet scraped if you ever remove it.
We ended up using someone that just dry scraped. Thought it was done. Oops. Won’t be hiring him anymore.
![]() 11/26/2015 at 03:28 |
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Hey - that’s the same result of a Wagner Power Painter! Damn - I didn’t know I could reproduce that with long hair.
![]() 11/26/2015 at 08:12 |
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Are you a musician? Composer?
Ttyymmnn is a musician, and so is our father. I am as musical as either of them, but not a musician, per se .
I’ve read a tiny bit about John Zorn, and he is definitely a provocative artist. I think I am equipped enough musically and intellectually to recognize that fact.
I do not mean to sound defensive, just making conversation. Your comments in this space are always clever and thoughtful.
Happy Thanksgiving!
![]() 11/26/2015 at 08:17 |
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This piece is sonorous and approachable, as compared with the piece that Wobbles posted, which was my initial introduction to Zorn:
http://oppositelock.kinja.com/john-zorn-bone…
![]() 11/26/2015 at 08:18 |
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If you’re going to paint, I say, choose interesting colors.
![]() 11/26/2015 at 09:37 |
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Wait. Wait. Wait. You two are related? Neat.
As to your question: I used to regularly play sax in a variety of genres, although calling myself a musician seems disingenuous. My enthusiasm far outstripped my natural talent and my discipline.
I find some of Zorn’s work very affecting, and I can appreciate how it can be very polarizing. It took me many years to find gateways which allowed me to appreciate modernist and experimental/avant-garde compositions.
Also, my all-caps response was meant to be humorous, not serious. Apologies if that was unclear. Happy Thanksgiving!
![]() 11/26/2015 at 09:41 |
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Even with drop cloths, we manged to trash the carpet.
![]() 11/26/2015 at 10:02 |
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No, it was good. I assumed positive intent.
Yes, Ttyymmnn and I are brothers and he is the one who lured me into becoming an opponutter.
What’s your profession? I’m a 7th grade math teacher.
![]() 11/27/2015 at 01:45 |
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Ah so, the old Drop Cloth Shuffle then, eh? Done that before, too.
You needed to replace that carpet with hardwood anyway, right? I mean, how else to get a decent road bed for Lego creations to crash into each other.
![]() 11/27/2015 at 09:02 |
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As men, isn’t this our only job? Or at least our primary job?
![]() 11/27/2015 at 12:49 |
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I would like hardwood, but I don’t think I can sell my wife on it.
![]() 12/01/2015 at 17:48 |
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Just checking in to let you know that I did email you. In case you have to look in your spam folder, it sent out at 6:50PM EST on the 25th. Happy belated thanksgiving, cheers.
![]() 12/08/2015 at 14:01 |
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I’m failing to finish a dissertation right now, and I alternate between teaching college classes and doing research assistance to pay the bills. So, I guess my profession (broadly defined) is: academic.
![]() 12/08/2015 at 15:04 |
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What is your primary academic area of interest?
![]() 12/08/2015 at 15:06 |
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(Looks around shiftily, hoping to not self-doxx...) International political economy. But, I’m a social science dilettante, so if a project seems interesting and I have some skills (quantitative, research design, game theory, etc.) which fit the bill, I’ll probably try it out.
![]() 12/08/2015 at 15:53 |
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Economy... I have a BS in mathematics, but I have never completed even an elementary course in statistics. Folks frequently say that we are a
military industrial complex.
Or a
prison industrial complex
. Seems to me we are also an
academic
complex. And to be clear, I am happy that we are, but there are some things that I find decidedly
not
interesting and cosmically
ir
relevant. Which is not to say that I feel so about
international political economy
, only that I’d rather work in the shipping department at Ikea than study that topic.
![]() 12/08/2015 at 16:10 |
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Haha. I can understand that sentiment COMPLETELY. Before I restarted my studies, I worked odd jobs (driving trucks, working on audio equipment, teaching college prep courses, and the like), and there are days when those alternatives seem vastly more exciting to me.
![]() 12/08/2015 at 17:38 |
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I regularly tell people that I want to quit teaching and drive a Pepsi truck. But more recently I began CrossFit workouts and I’m thinking that I’d like to work for a commercial tire service and be dispatched to change flat tires on big rigs and earth movers and the like. And I wasn’t kidding about working at the shipping department of Ikea. That would be fun.